The Sunday School answer is still the best one

So I was making my way out after listening to the lunchtime talk from Joe Boot on whether Christianity is restrictive or promises true freedom with a non-Christian friend. I confess, I think he did ramble on a bit, and I wasn't sure if he really spoke to the heart as well as to the mind, as it were. But it was all in all a good presentation contending for the intellectual credibility of the Christian faith, and he marshalled the philosophical arguments well.

Anyway, I then noticed a girl whom I had chatted to briefly last night at another event, and so decided to go over and say hi. And got ambushed.

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Me: Oh, hi... (interrupted)

Girl: (obviously still buzzing from the talk, speaking at 100mph) Yeah wasn't that a really good talk but I really disagreed with him as I think it was all based on an assumption that needn't be made that life had to find its meaning in God I mean we can obviously derive meaning from other things like family or friends and find fulfillment in that don't you think?

Me: (trying to pick myself up from the bullet train in front of me) Errr...yes...but isn't it, um, true, um, that his central point was how much life would simply be meaningless without a God? And um, what an empty life that would be?

Girl: Sure but do you really need a God for that I mean I don't see why you need God for life to be meaningful at all when you can be perfectly happy with what you've got at the moment...

Me: (screaming silently at brain to come back from lunch break and voicebox to stop stuttering) Yes, I can see where you're coming from... (obviously stalling for time while brain wakes up from siesta)...so um, what you're saying is that ultimately, there's no reason why it can't be up to us to find our own meaning in life...

Girl: Yes... (looks expectantly at me while I desperately attempt to look to be in deep contemplation)

Me: Errm...(here I started a sentence - twice - before hastily rephrasing it)That's interesting, as um, I think he (Joe Boot) chose a particular line looking at how ultimately only Christianity lends our lives deep meaning. But you're right, why shouldn't we be able to um, make our own meaning? But the question isn't simply pragmatic, it isn't just about where we find meaning or fulfillment or happiness, it's also about truth. If God is God, if he's real, he's there, then surely he's the one who has the final say as to where we find real meaning or happiness? I mean, if there's no God, then you're right, we can invest meaning in whatever we wish. But if God is there, then surely he's the one whom we derive meaning from, and so we want to live in conformity with what he says.

Girl: (finally slowing down a little) I see...so what you're saying is, there's actually another issue at stake here, whether God exists or not...

Me: (Whew!) Yes, exactly, that's what we need to think about first...

Girl: But...I don't see how that question can ever be answered. I don't think there's any way we can ever find out if God does exist or not.

Me: (depending on reflex at this point, and probably the Holy Spirit) That's interesting, because that's exactly what the Christian claim is. You know, in John's Gospel, it says that we can actually find out whether God exists, what he's like because, because, and this is what Christians believe, Jesus has made God known. Look at Jesus, Christians say, and you'll know God.

Girl: ...never really thought about that before...

Me: And so Christians will say, look at Jesus' claims. What's he like? Is he whom he says he is? I mean, if he isn't, then Christianity falls completely. But if he is, can you see how that completely changes everything? (Girl nods) It just turns your world upside down! So we need to find out more about Jesus. He's the pivotal figure.

Girl: So you're saying I need to go find out more about Jesus because he's basically the pivot, the one on which everything stands? Yeah I can see that.

Me: Do you think you'll be exploring more on this then?

Girl: Yeah, I think I will! Got to go!

Me: (still slightly dazed) What just happened??

The conversation lasted, I think, only 7 minutes or so, but I don't think I've quite wrapped my head around it just yet. But I guess, the Sunday School answer is really, still the best one. I certainly hope she'll realise that.

*Conversation not verbatim obviously, but I think I've reproduced the phrasing fairly accurately


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The wind blows wherever it pleases...

Some of you might remember my friend L, whom I got to share my life with for a little while. I miss his great cooking! You might remember me reading the Bible regularly with him and getting to share the gospel. I share a little bit about that here. He's now back in his home country, and I hope and believe, still thinking through Christianity.

Another friend I've made more recently is a guy I'll call HH. HH has already been thinking about Christianity and reading the Bible even before he came to England. He started off based in Oxford at a language school, where he ran into some Christians, including the ones who just might be my future boss and colleague at a certain church where I'll soon be at! They showed him great hospitality and also read the Bible with him. He then moved to London to go to another language school here, where he happened to run into another person who happened to have Oxford ties. Er, that would be me. I got to know him a bit, more formally as he came to the evangelistic Bible studies I was co-leading, and as we chatted and spent a little bit of time outside formal settings. I wasn't the only one, of course; Christians who could speak his language would immediately have some advantages over me, and they could engage with him at a level I couldn't possibly hope to attain. But HH and I got along well, which was easy since he was quite a likable guy anyway, and hopefully continued to be a friend and witness. I remember in particular the one night when he talked honestly about his problem of anxiety attacks and me trying to think through how to help him as best as I could specifically as a Christian.

There was no doubt God was working in his life. He couldn't stop bumping into Christians! Last night, as we were both going to be going our separate ways soon, he to Bristol to start a Masters, me to Oxford, I gave him this book, which I hoped might be of some use to him - I even wrote a message in it in which I express hope that the book might a stepping stone in which he would get to know and trust Jesus for himself.

Tonight, another friend invited HH and me over for dinner. On his way here, HH said he had some good news. I thought, "Maybe he's bringing more food!" (Yes, I really did think that! I'm obviously Malaysian). Obviously you readers can see where I'm going much better than I did. I was caught flat-footed when he announced, unambiguously, that after a long chat with yet another Christian, that he had now put his faith in Jesus! Didn't see that coming at all. In fact, he thought that we would have twigged something by now and had, rather hilariously, expected us to have some sort of long speech prepared to tell him how to live as a new Christian. We sort of stumbled our way thru what were some of the things to expect as a Christian, and some of the privileges as well, and a little bit on the place of doubt in the Christian life and how to break the news to his family.

But it's brilliant news to see God at work regenerating those he has called. I know this doesn't quite make sense - but I always feel astonished when somebody I know actually decides to be a Christian, as in "really? We didn't put him off it? So he actually believes the Bible?" (I know, somewhat paradoxical in light of my recent blog posts on Scripture as well!) But Jesus surely knows what he's talking about when he says: "The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit." (John 3:8)

Anyway, yes, just thought I'll share.


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Slave labour

Last week my brother worked a 40-hour day. Yes, you read that right. He went into the office on Tuesday morning and did not emerge until Wednesday night, and this without virtually any shuteye. (Yes, the coffee machine was put to good use). Apparently, some client - who btw, happens to be a well-known Malaysian corporate figure - decided that he wanted a certain deal to be done in some crazy timeframe and so the underlings were put to work after signing the obligatory waiver. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, slavery still exists, and not only in the seedy underbelly of Third World countries, but within the glittering glass-walls of the City.

Be a lawyer, they said. As I told my brother yesterday, it's almost enough to make me embrace a new calling: trade unionist.

Hermeneutics quiz

This was an interesting hermeneutics quiz (how we read our Bibles) designed by Scot McKnight (HT: Lim Kar Yong - who is such a liberal! How can we let such ppl teach in seminaries one... :-p)

"Ever wonder how two people can look at the same passage of the Bible and come away with such different applications? The ways we interpret the Bible, and what enters into our process of applying the Bible, are important for us to be aware of. Without this self-awareness, we can have blind spots in our Bible reading and not even know it."

This quiz "is designed to clarify how you understand the Bible and how you apply it. Some people will quibble with the categories in the quiz or insist on more than one answer. That’s okay. No test like this can reveal all the nuances needed, but broad answers are sufficient to benefit from taking the quiz."

I scored 57, which apparently means I'm a moderate (53-65). The other categories are "conservative" and "progressive". According to McKnight, moderates "are conservative on some issues and progressive on others. It intrigues me that conservatives tend to be progressive on the same issues, while progressives tend to be conservative on the same issues. Nonetheless, moderates have a flexible hermeneutic that gives them the freedom to pick and choose on which issues they will be progressive or conservative [makes me sound wishy-washy! -BK]. For that reason, moderates are more open to the charge of inconsistency. What impresses me most about moderates are the struggles they endure to render judgments on hermeneutical issues."

There were some answers I found very hard to pick actually, and some where I was not entirely happy with the language used, but McKnight did acknowledge as much. I still think my answers actually make me a conservative, and that those who hold to literalistic readings of the Bible be better called "fundamentalists".

The question on tattoos reminded me that I was at quite a different place eons ago. When I was 15 or 16 I remembered being at a youth camp where I was a small group leader for the first time. Somehow we ended up having a conversation on whether it was Christian to have tattoos or not and I remember trying to push my group, asking them if it was okay to have a "John 3:16" tattoo. Then I read out Leviticus 19:28. We all then agreed that it was settled, no tattoos, whatever the tattoo proclaims! I feel sheepish thinking about it now...

So what are you?

Apologetics in the service of God

What a fine, fine essay on apologetics in service to the kingdom of God. Definitely one of the best I’ve read on this topic in some time. It’s the type of stuff I wished I’ve written. Thanks, Mr. (Dr.?) Rauser!

My church is doing a series of apologetics-evangelistic talks this week, and as some in my seekers Bible study group wanted to go to last night’s talk, I went along with them. Professor John Lennox, whom I’ve already mentioned a couple of times on this blog, was doing one on "Has Science buried God?". This is the third time I’ve heard him speak on this topic, and this was possibly the best and most moving yet – he responded very sensitively to a question on suffering and Auschwitz, and his account of the conclusion of a recent debate with Richard Dawkins was arresting. Given time to put forward their concluding remarks, Lennox had spoken of the resurrection and hope, to which Dawkins condescendingly responded: “Resurrection? We’ve just had a very fascinating discussion on science and religion, and you end on this fanciful note? How unworthy, how utterly unworthy of the universe.” Lennox reflected on this statement for a long time afterwards, and concluded: “Dawkins has it backwards, ultimately, it is the resurrection which gives worth to this universe.” Btw, if you didn’t know before, Lennox has finally written a book, God's Undertaker, on this very topic, so if this is something you want to dig further into, then his work should definitely be on top of your reading list!

Lennox is a fine communicator with the ability to explain complex things simply, but as my group is not proficient in English, they obviously struggled with the talk. But in helping them try to understand, I actually thought they probably got more out of it than some hardened atheists I know. I asked one of them, “So what were you able to follow?” He said, “Science is limited”. I laughed and replied, “You got half the lecture!” He was able to agree whole-heartedly with that, and had no objections to the argument from complexity either as articulated by Lennox after I had explained it to him. Considering how many people fail to see that a purely scientific approach is actually silent on questions of ultimate reality, this was a heartening experience.

Which brings me back to the essay I mentioned at the beginning of the post.
One of the things the essay brings to our attention is quite simply, the degree to which belief or unbelief may seem convincing is related to its surrounding culture, what is sometimes known as the "plausibility structure". I think for my seeker friends, it is possible that not being raised in the intense furnace of a culture that glorifies rationalism meant that it was much clearer to them that science has its limits (although my premise is undermined by the fact that they come from an atheistic culture as well). Also, just seeing an Oxford professor unashamedly claim to be Christian, even if they can’t follow every detail of his lecture, helps communicate that Christianity is never about blind faith. Whereas one of my other friends, was telling me how frustrated he was in inviting people to this talk, as none of them were even willing to entertain the notion that religion/Christianity – not necessarily synonymous, mind you! – might have something worthwhile to say. Tim Keller makes a similar point:

"Every culture hostile to Christianity holds to a set of 'common sense' consensus beliefs that automatically make Christianity seem implausible to people. These are what philosophers call 'defeater beliefs'. A defeater belief is Belief-A that, if true, means Belief-B can’t be true.

Christianity is disbelieved in one culture for totally opposite reasons it is disbelieved in another. So, for example, in the West it is widely assumed that Christianity can’t be true because of the cultural belief that there can’t be just one 'true' religion. But, in the Middle East, people have absolutely no problem with the idea that there is just one true religion. That doesn’t seem implausible at all. Rather, there it is widely assumed that Christianity can’t be true because of the cultural belief that American culture, based on Christianity, is unjust and corrupt...So, each culture has its own set of culturally-based doubt-generators which people call 'objections' or 'problems' with Christianity."

Elsewhere, Keller is keen to show that the gospel affirms various individual cultures, explaining that we need to "connect the story of Jesus to baseline cultural narratives", or in other words, showing that a culture (Asian, African, Western, gothic, skater-bois, etc.) need not necessarily be set in stark opposition to the gospel. But at the same time, the gospel must confront the idolatrous aspects of each of our respective cultures. This is where arguments can play a role. So, as both Keller and Rauser show, even in a world where people are pragmatic rather than abstract in their reasoning, or seeking to make meaning out of their lives rather than looking for answers to intellectual objections,

"we need to recognize that the rational discussion is intricately interwoven with a broad range of non-rational factors (e.g. psychological, sociological and hamartiological [i.e sin]). As such, this involves a shift from focusing on arguments to persons within the context of a broad cultural renewal and the strategic use of arguments within that renewal."

Thus, this is not to denigrate the place of love, integrity, community, stories, relationship, social concern etc.; just the opposite really as all those are key. It’s simply not to drop rational arguments from the list. In my experience, I find that this is true, non-Christians enjoy being part of a loving Christian community, but they also do want to know how Christianity answers the big questions and the claims it makes on our lives. "Defeater beliefs" need to be dismantled: the belief that Christians are arrogant can be dismantled both by seeing Christians love their neighbour and serving each other in humility, as well as a more cognitive understanding that the gospel Christians believe is actually one that sees

1. everyone, including themselves, as sinners, i.e not just failing to love God but actively hating him
   
2. giving Christians no basis on which to peddle their superiority over others, but a basis which recognises their profound need of the mercy of God
   
3. and therefore humbly accepting the grace and forgiveness Jesus offers as a gift through his death in my place, finding significance in him rather than in feeling superior over others
   
4. And also the basis for why Christians want to share their faith with others, not because they want to impose their beliefs on others or because their religion is better, but because it is good news!
   

But we need our rational faculties not merely in the act of deconstruction but reconstruction as well. And so, for example, becoming a Christian means

1. being convinced of the historical plausibility of the resurrection
   
2. and its implications: that Jesus is victorious, that this provides a foretaste of the world to come, that judgement is coming.
   
3. This in turn gives Christians the necessary impetus to work in light of eternity, and so be willing to witness explicitly if tactfully, help the poor, fight injustice, and celebrate the goodness of culture where it is to be found. As John Lennox points out, atheism undermines the basis for a just world, Christian theism affirms it.
   

The gospel is eternally relevant: it always speaks in some way to our hopes and fears and dreams, healing our balms, and it is also eternally demanding: challenging our worldviews, correcting our perspectives, calling us to times of hardship.

Anyway, do read the whole thing so that my ramblings might make some sense: Worshipping a Flying Teapot? What to Do when Christianity Looks Ridiculous.


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Profile of a baby-snatcher

Quake in fear, all mums and tots! BK is on the prowl...

Was on the Tube yesterday and probably stared too long at this super-cute toddler and his antics in the same carriage. I got out at Waterloo only to discover that the Jubilee Line wasn't running, so I hopped back onto the Northern Line to change at Kennington. Once at Kennington, got onto the train I wanted only to discover, having left them back at Waterloo, the same mum and cute tot! The mum was visibly startled to see me again, and after my earlier stare-a-thon she had probably sized me up as some pram-snatching stalker. Thankfully, once she started cooing at her kid again she forgot all about me.

Cannot...resist...cuteness...

Point of the post? Er, do I need one? I could talk about the other time when a fistfight broke out on my train carriage, shattered windows and all...

Starstruck

Overheard (though not by me) in the lifts at Covent Garden Tube station -

Out of town Girl 1: "Ooooh, ooooh! We're in London now! Do you think we'll see anyone famous?"

Out of town Girl 2: "Oh I hope so. Loads of famous people live in London. I bet we do. Especially here!"

London Girl behind them (snorting): "Yeah. All our famous people come to the lifts at Covent Garden."

Films of the year

First, the pseudo-advert and the biggest 'awwww' of the year...


Next, the trailer...


And on to the main feature!

I haven’t watched that many films this year, partly because London cinemas are more expensive (although the one near my bro’s place is certainly value-for-money: fairly cheap for a very pleasant environment, and even better, not overly crowded!), but also because my two movie kakis are no longer in this country. :( As with the books, I’ll simply list them as far as I can remember. Some are technically older releases which I caught on DVD.

Babel was nominated for an Oscar earlier this year and I really enjoyed it. It intertwines three narratives set in the Americas, Africa and Japan respectively, exploring the consequences of our actions, cultural prejudice and the importance of family. I know quite a few think it overwrought though. Hot Fuzz is my favourite comedy of the year, certainly one of my overall favourites of 2007. Simon Pegg and Edgar Wright team together again in this hilarious story of a cop whose record is so good that he gets assigned to a sleepy English village so that the others don’t look so bad. I also absolutely loved Sunshine, the sci-fi flick from Danny Boyle about the dying sun, even if recent revelations (to me) regarding Alex Garland’s screenplay put a new spin on my interpretation of the movie. The Curse of the Golden Flower wasn’t bad, although the kaleidoscope of colours and the intricate politics of the imperial Chinese court is a potent combination guaranteed to make your head spin. The Lives of Others can lay claim to being the best film of the year, as it follows the cat-and-mouse game between an East German secret agent and the dissenters of the Communist regime, culminating in powerful sacrifices having to be made on both sides. The Painted Veil is an adaptation of a Somerset Maugham book, regarding the healing of a fractured marriage of a young English couple set (mostly) in 1920s China. It’s great to see a positive portrayal of marriage on the big screen.

Amazing Grace is a good biopic of William Wilberforce, considering that I thought it could easily have been very dull. Spiderman 3’s pacing may have been a little off, but is still a great summer movie. I’ve written a sort of reflection-cum-review elsewhere on this blog...Transformers is exactly what you’d expect, mindless entertainment. Story? What story? It’s all about the robots baby. Little Miss Sunshine was the quirky indie hit of 2006, a story that ostensibly is about the hilarious attempt to get the youngest daughter, Olivia, of a rather dysfunctional family to a beauty pageant on time but is really about family sticking together, no matter how messed up we are. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix is huge fun, although knowing the book definitely helps. The Simpsons Movie feels just like an extended TV special, which is fine as long as you’re a Simpsons fan. Gags aplenty. I admit it, I watched High School Musical! Another well-written romantic comedy was the Korean film Two Hundred Pounds Beauty. It’s both intelligent and funny! I also caught the London International Animation Festival this year, which featured a collection of animation shorts. I remember enjoying Recto Verso in particular.

Little Children is one of the best “dysfunction bubbling underneath perfect suburban life” films I’ve seen. My in-depth review is here. Darren Aranofsky is acknowledged as one of the more talented directors working in America today, but The Fountain is just terrible. It’s overly melodramatic and contrived. Thankfully, the movie I watched after that was the magnificent Ratatouille, which continues Pixar’s winning streak. I say it has a longshot for an Oscar Best Pic nomination. This is one not to be missed. Once is a sweet slice-of-life tale of a friendship between a budding street musician and a Czech immigrant, backed by an excellent soundtrack. Fracture is a courtroom thriller with an overly cocky Ryan Gosling battling Anthony Hopkin’s cunning. The performances of both lift the movie out of B-grade territory.
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That’s it, I think. I feel like I missed out on quite a lot. Having not watched the second instalments of either Pirates of the Carribean or the Bourne franchise, I naturally didn't watch Part 3. I did watch both Shreks but decided the underwhelming reviews meant that it was time to put Shrek 3 to bed. Some of the films I’ve heard raved about include the Romanian film 4 Months, 3 Weeks & Two Days, No Country for Old Men (not yet released in the UK), The Diving Bell and the Butterfly, the harrowing documentary Darfur Now, Michael Clayton, Knocked Up (well, my brother thought it was intelligently written and the reviews seem to agree), Rescue Dawn, Zodiac and This is England.

Ghibli also had a film out this year by Hayao Miyazaki’s son, Tales of Earthsea, but that has gotten a mixed reception. The Golden Compass has gotten more bad reviews than good, and I don’t mean from Christian outlets with agendas! American Gangster is apparently solid but nothing more. Ditto for Atonement. Lion for Lambs too talky and more suited for the theatre than the cinema, concludes the vast majority of reviewers. The Devil Came on Horseback is another much-needed Darfur documentary. The Assassination of Jesse James is meant to be pretty good and solidifies the comeback of the Western, although it’s also very long.

Some of the films I’m looking forward to watching include indie favourite (and also favourably reviewed) Juno, Lars and the Real Girl and Enchanted, which, although it supposedly suffers from a lacklustre ending, is meant to be Disney gently poking fun at itself.

Roll the credits...

Paste Magazine’s best films of 2007
Top rated films according to Rotten Tomatoes
Awards Daily best films of 2007
Roger Ebert, when he finally gets round to choosing it
Christianity Today Movies Top Films, not yet out

What were your top/favourite films of the year?


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A conversation

I sat next to a guy at evening service today. He was a little scruffy-looking, with a haircut not dissimilar to Nicholas Cage in Con Air. Actually, I thought he looked uncannily like someone (in?)famous, but I still can't figure out who. He looked fairly intimidating, not the kind of guy you want to play roughhouse with. It was a little surprising, then, when we both stood up at the end of the service, to find out that I was actually taller!

The service started with a reflection on Scripture,and I noticed that he didn't have a Bible and offered to share mine with him. He nodded politely at me and said he was fine without one. As the music struck up, I then noticed that he didn't have a service sheet. (We're old school, no OHP projectors!) So again, I offered to share. He mumbled something and declined again. Then I cottoned on. He must have found reading difficult, and if I insisted I would just have embarrassed him. So I let him be.

Because my church is pretty big and so it's likely you're sitting next to someone different each week, there's always a moment during the service where we have a pause and introduce ourselves. So at this juncture, I said hi to Nicholas Cage. He gave me a name. David. Not Rusty James or Motorcycle Boy then. We talked a little. He seemed reticent, yet at the same time pleased that I was attempting to engage him in conversation. He asked me how long I had been coming - I've been here for just over a year now. He claimed to have been coming for two. I asked him how he found it. "Oh, I like it maybe 50%? No, just 40%," he said. "What about you?". "Oh, errr...70?" I said, probably unhelpfully. I wish now that I had pursued what he thought of the church or said something more about the church as family; putting percentages on it was simply travelling down a cul-de-sac. In any case, he chuckled.

He then asked me if I was a Christian. I nodded. He wasn't. But he was coming as he wanted to learn. I asked him if he had been learning much. "Well," he reflected. "It's not easy, you know. I've been listening, real hard, but," he knocked his forehead lightly, "not much goes in here, you know? I'm sure you find it easier as a Christian," he looked at me a little wistfully. I wanted to encourage him and almost quoted Jeremiah 29:13. Instead, I said, not very coherently, something along the lines of how it was really God's work that helps us understand and I'm sure it could help him too, which this time drew a more cynical look. He replied, "Ah, but the devil is at work too." We lapsed into a silence. And then I asked him, "So when you're not here on a Sunday, what do you do?". He said rather reluctantly, "Oh, I work." Seeing his reluctance to divulge information, I didn't probe further. But with some effort, he looked at me directly, and said, "I work in a casino." I nodded; that wasn't shocking really - it wasn't like he had announced that he was pimping Eastern European girls for a living. At this point our conversation was interrupted as we were brought back together by the service leader. But it was not before he whispered to me: "I've seen the devil's work firsthand."

Charlie preached a characteristically fine and heartfelt sermon on 1 John 2:28-3:10. As always, Charlie helped bring out the relational implications as we saw what it meant to live as the family of God, as his children. In light of David's comments on God and Satan, I couldn't help but wonder what he (David) made of 1 John 3:10. 1 John is not an easy letter to read and can be read very moralistically. Charlie did a good job of making sure we still saw Jesus in v.5 and v.8, but I did wonder whether a non-Christian would have seen the gospel of grace, especially if he was thrown right into this passage without any prior knowledge. (This isn't a fault of either Charlie or the Apostle John of course!)

At the end of the service I bit my lip, sent a quick prayer to my Father and turned to David. "What did you think of the talk?" I inquired. He looked startled to be asked his opinion. "What do I think?" he repeated. The cynic re-emerged. "Well, it's not very realistic is it?" he said. "How so?" I asked. "Well, the world, everyone's, full of sins aren't they?" I agreed: "Yes, the world is a broken place - none of us are good, we're all sinners." We lapsed into another short silence, and then he mumbled something - I wasn't able to catch it all but it was along the lines of "what's the point? All this doing good, all these rules are useless anyway." I saw that this was rapidly heading towards moralism, so I tried to redirect the conversation towards Jesus. We had a short exchange but I don't think he quite got that Jesus is the centre of Christianity and who we're all about. He shook his head, sighed, then said: "Oh, all this scanning [his word] to see whether you're doing right or not. I think it must be exhausting. It's more relaxed, you know, to not worry about such things." I replied, as gently as I could: "Actually, I think it's the other way around." He suddenly looked very interested. "Why is that?" So I tried to explain how Jesus, and indeed, the message of 1 John, is one of reassurance and security, and freedom to follow and know God.

At this point, someone who apparently knew him came over to say hi, and it was clear from their ensuing conversation that he had been actively trying to love David and to introduce him to God's love. I was encouraged by that. It was time to go, so we said our farewells.

I thought about David on the way home. I thought about how he must really be spiritually hungry, even as he oscillated between cynicism and longing. After all, to keep coming to church even when he liked it "only 40%"? I wondered how he felt being in a predominantly middle-class church. I wondered what he saw at work in the casino and how that coloured his world. I wondered too how to reach non-book people like him. Before writing this post, I remembered vaguely that Tim Chester had written an article on this very subject and googled around for it in vain. If anyone knows where it is, please do tell me!

I'm glad too. I think how difficult it must be for Charlie and others who are engaged in the preaching ministry, and how they must work hard at "speaking God's words", as it were. I'm grateful that the Holy Spirit is the one who ultimately does the work and not us. I'm encouraged that there's people, like this brother, who are following God and loving him by loving others. In a big church like mine, I know it's easy to be critical and be especially dismissive of it as a middle-class ghetto. But there's much that goes unseen.

I'm not too sure why I wrote this post, but I had to get it out of the system.


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IFES world student day

Today is IFES World Student Day. I am a big fan of the student work IFES does all over the world, and can testify to having benefitted much from my involvement in OICCU. I remember truly understanding the global reach of IFES a couple of years ago when I heard Lindsey Brown, the former General Secretary, speak twice, once to a predominantly white audience in Oxford at a missions evening, and then, that summer, coming to Kuching and encouraging an audience of local tertiary students whose English was not the best but who were so obviously hungry to know God better and to live for Him. (It was actually pretty surreal as I was the only overseas student at that Kuching gathering!)

Students can testify to God's workings everywhere, and this is my favourite student story of 2007:

BGC CU (a small arts college in the UK) are a small group of students, around 15 or so, who were recently thrown out of their Student Union, derecognised as a student society and had their bank account frozen. The SU had sent along a "spy" to the weekly CU meeting, which happened to be one of the PURE course sessions which teach the biblical view on sex and relationships. The girl enjoyed it so much that she actually came back the following night, boyfriend in tow!

After much prayer and discussion, the Student Union decided to reinstate the CU just before they were due to put on some events designed for student witness. Guess who became a Christian at those events? Yes, the very same spy!

Let it not be said that God doesn't possess a sense of humour! :)

May the angels truly dance!

I thought I'll share this. A few months ago, I told the story of my good friend L and shared my joy at what I thought was his decision to turn to Jesus. To my embarassment, it turned out that my announcement was premature. My friend, L, told me that he didn't think he was a Christian yet, although he was "trying to be one". As we talked, it became clear that he still hadn't grasped the gospel yet, but was still hungry to know more.

L went back to his home country over the summer, but returned a couple of weeks ago. Today we met up to read the Bible together.
I thought that as I've been doing Romans in my Bible studies, we would turn to Romans 1:1-17, and particularly to bring out the nature of the gospel as Paul describes it in this letter. As a lead-in question, I asked, "So, what would you say, generally speaking, is good news?" He was slightly confused by my question, so I said, "I suppose if I got really good results in my exams, that would be an example of good news, wouldn't it?" He agreed enthusiastically, and together we thought of a few other examples: a good friend gets married, Manchester United thrashing Arsenal (what? that is good news!). I thought I'll push him a little more, and asked, "What about on a bigger scale, maybe? What would be really good news?" Now, at this point, I was thinking that he would reply along the lines of "the end of war" or something like that. He then trained his gaze meaningfully at me, rubbed his chin, and said, " You know what, BK? I know what was definitely the bestest good news for you. It's obvious. It was when you met and knew Jesus. There surely can't be any better news than that."

That answer probably accounts for the spilt coffee all over my Bible and jeans. Probably from all the tension of trying to keep my jaw shut.

We had a good time exploring what Paul says about the gospel, and it was great, noticing the divine origins of the gospel and its supreme subject matter: Jesus Christ. As we got to 1:16 and looked at it, I asked him (actually, this must be the Holy Spirit, since there's no way I'll ever be so bold!): "So, why do you think I want to tell you about Jesus?" And he went: "Because you're not ashamed?" (If I had more coffee I'd would have spilt it all. And I was thinking to myself: "Oh L, how wrong you are! I'm more ashamed than I care to admit!"). And he went on: "And you want me to believe in him because you know that's the best for me." Now at the is point I was thinking, who's really getting more out of our Bible-reading time here, me or him?

I was really happy that he seemed to grasp more of the saving work of Jesus. Even better was when we went to the evening service tonight, and I saw the sermon outline included "Denying the gospel" and "Living by the gospel". (It was on 1 John 1:5-2:2). At the end of the service, he told me that he had prayed to God, asking him to help him follow Jesus. And he said that there were less and less barriers stopping him, although there was still one significant barrier, which I wouldn't share here. We had a good discussion on forgiveness and how the gospel impacts us corporately, especially in the way Christians relate to others. He asked good questions and pushed me harder to think through some of my own assumptions.

I thought I'll share this simply as an encouragement to others, and to catch a glimpse of the glorious gospel we have. I know how difficult witnessing is, and I'm a wimp most, if not all, of the time. Yet I'm just stunned sometimes, even with Romans 1:16 being hammered into me, how dynamic, how powerful, how life-giving the gospel is. Please do pray for L that he would turn to Jesus. Only God changes hearts. And pray for me too. Even as I share this, I'm aware I have mixed motives, as if sharing this proves my Christian credentials or elevates my status or something. Instead, I turn to the words of that old hymn that it might prove true:

May the love of Jesus fill me
As the waters fill the sea;
Him exalting, self abasing,
This is victory, this is victory.

...And may they forget the channel,
Seeing only Him, seeing only Him.

[Complete digression: This hymn has been set to a smashing new tune by Mark Peterson!]


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Drawing an arrow from Bhutan to Barcelona

I read The Global Soul: Jet Lag, Shopping Malls, and the Search for Home by TIME journalist Pico Iyer around July. It's an absorbing read, as Iyer tells the story of his multicultural upbringing and the globe-trotting that forms part of his profession, while reflecting on what it means to be a global citizen in today's connected world. Occasionally he overreaches - attempting to establish a link between an observation and a more general point he's trying to make when none exist. Still, I guess you could say that about a lot of reportage.

The anecdote he shares about Bhutanese archers is, for some reason, the one that sticks the most in my mind, and when I read this little story, I knew I wanted to share it. Here is Iyer, at the 1992 Barcelona Olympics:

They were archers, from Bhutan, as it transpired, who couldn't quite orient themselves amidst this crush of alienness.

They'd never seen a stadium before, one of the teenagers explained, They'd never seen a high-rise building, or a working television set, and they'd never seen a boat. I remember how, in their landlocked home, I'd watched students practise archery between the willow trees behind the Druk Hotel., their arrows whistling through the silent air.

None of them had ever boarded a plane before, one of them went on (in careful English - the Raj having penetrated even those places that television could not reach), and none of them had ever competed before crowds (besides, Olympic rules are so different from Bhutanese that they were all but guaranteed last place). "I thought Barcelona was going to be peaceful, like Thimbu," one of the young students said. "It's so busy!" The Olympic Village alone was almost the size of their capital.

...what stays with me, many years later, is the image of those guileless, bewildered, excited, souls, one day in a hidden kingdom where everyone has to wear medieval clothes and all the buildings are constructed in fourteenth century style, and the next, in the midst of the greatest planetary show on earth. And then, after two weeks surounded by exploding flashbulbs, to be back in their forgotten home, where the only concrete mementos they'd have of their surreal episode would be their photographs. Whenever she had a free moment, one of the archers told me, she hurried off to take pictures of the habor. She'd never seen an ocean before.

P/S I never saw him, but when I was at Oxford, the Bhutanese prince was studying there too, and had to leave halfway to quell a civil war! Kind of puts my essay crisis into perspective...

I *heart* Malaysia

There’s an air of pessimism regarding the state of Malaysia that’s really palpable this time around, and it’s not without its grounds. It's not merely in the spirit of Merdeka however, but more importantly, as someone who self-identifies as a Christian, that hopelessness, bitterness and despair should never form the lens that funnels my vision, although the line of sight itself will likely be murky. In this respect, Wai Nyan’s been trying to get people to engage in an exercise akin to polishing our telescopes: brainstorming on why we love Malaysia. Here’s some of my stuff.

What exactly is a nation? Benedict Anderson once famously defined it as an “imagined community”. In other words, l will naturally feel that I share in some form of communion, a shared kinship, with other Malaysians even though I will never meet every single Malaysian out there. I set some form of boundary which differentiates me from non-Malaysians. And this is true, as far as it goes. I was born a Malaysian, I have particular experiences and memories from having been raised there, and I regard it as "home". The Malaysia I know best is the part situated on the island of Borneo, and my list will inevitably reflect the limitedness of my experience. At the same time, the Malaysia I love does not remain confined by those limits. I’m happy to accept mamak stalls as uniquely Malaysian, even if most of my fellow countrymen forget that mamak stalls is actually a West Malaysian thing. I’m not fussed at all if you drop the adjectival "West".

Having had the opportunity to meet many people of other nationalities, I also know that in one sense, we are not all that different. We speak fondly of Malaysian time, i.e our capacity to be late for any and every function, but Mexicans (and many other Latin American cultures) speak of Mexican time in exactly the same terms. South Africans call everybody "mama" and "papa" the same way we refer to everyone as "uncle" and "aunty". Jamaicans have their own colloqualisms - "mon" - like we do. And so on and so forth.

Still, I do love Malaysia, hence this post. This list isn’t original or imaginative in the very least. I think everybody else has nicked mentioned what I wanted to say. It was actually really difficult to come up with! Food, unsurprisingly, is a prominent theme. It’s also not ordered in any way.


1. A multiracial society. This is an obvious one, and we sometimes downplay it as an expertly stage-managed Tourism Malaysia charade. Nonetheless, it’s easy to take this for granted. Having had to explain the makeup of Malaysian society to countless friends, you begin to realise the rich mosaic of people we have that is hard to find anywhere else. It means we have quite unique problems as well, but I don’t think I’ll trade this for anything else.

2. Manglish...which is actually a very sophisticated language. (I even managed to squeeze in a mention of it in one of my Finals papers on literature and language!) The versatility of the suffix "lah" never ceases to amaze me, its applications ranging from emphasis ("Comelah!") to suggestiveness ("Trylah!") to dismay ("cannotlah..."). And where are you going to find a translation that can capture the essence of "perasaan"? So how do you learn Manglish? Aiyah, this kind of thing very hard to teach one you know! Just talklah!

3. As Deb has pointed out, many Malaysians are at the very least, trilingual. That’s cool. Even rubbish me can speak more than one language: English, Malay, Hokkien, and errr..Spanish (I took it for 6 months a couple of years back and even passed an exam!). My sis-in-law is the queen of dialects: Hokkien, Foochow, Cantonese, Hakka and who knows what else...

4. No one else can quite put his finger on the pulse of Malaysian society like Lat and Kampung Boy. And his caricatures of Malaysian politicians are laugh-out-funny too, especially Sami Veeeeelluuuuuuuu......

5. Kolo mee. Really, all you non-Kuchingnites are missing out...

6. Heading to the interior of Sarawak on a longboat and seeing longhouses with

7. Astro...which I also miss – it’s as good a cable TV provider as anywhere! (Aiyoh, my worldliness is showing...)

8. My halo is slipping! Fine, fine, I also love SIB. Is it back in place yet? But seriously though, I have huge affection for the church I grew up in, a truly Malaysian denomination with a rich heritage and which gave me most of my non-Chinese friends. Hudson Southwell’s Uncharted Waters is the most comprehensive history of SIB at the moment, while Shirley Lees' Drunk Before Dawn and Ray Cunningham’s Longhouses Open Doors are good introductions. From a Malaysian's viewpoint, try Solomon Bulan's The Bario Revival.

9. The many, many public holidays! (Bank holidays to you Brits.) I’m such a bum.

10. The various kuih-muih and other such delicacies which I never know how to describe in English.

11. Fruits. Ironically, I’m actually not that keen on durians, rambutans, and lychees, but hey, where else are you going to find them?

12. It’s winter and the chill is setting in. You’re a struggling overseas student without much money to spare. Foraging around your room, you throw away last week’s laundry and put aside those chocolate fingers you’ve been nibbling on all week, only to spot that packet of Maggi Kari flavour hiding in the corner. You become a theist faster than I can say: "Free Will Defense!"

13. “The air is wet, soaks / into mattresses, and curls / in apparitions of smoke. / ...the damp linen covers / of schoolbooks... / Drinking Milo / Nyonya and Baba sit at home / this was forty years ago / …by clouds and rolling darkness / …listening to the down-pouring rain…”
Those are lines from Shirley Lim’s poem Monsoon History, and does a great job of capturing the associations I have with milo-drinking. The early mornings when it’s still relatively dark and I’m drowsily catching bits and pieces of mum’s pearls of wisdom on the wonders Milo does for my bones, subconsciously tugging at my school uniform while trying to figure out if I have Kimia or BM first thing in the morning, which will radically affect my attitude to being late for class.

14. This is replicated in many places all over the world, but you know that nice buzz you get when you’re at a pasar malam or open air makan area, like in say, Guerney Drive in Penang? I miss that. Pubs are NOT AT ALL the same.

15. It’s quite nice to know that animals like proboscis monkeys, pelanduks, hornbills or orangutans are quintessentially Malaysian.

16. And to know that Malaysia has great natural beauty too, from coral reefs, gargantuous caves to Rafflesia flowers (Ok, they’re smelly, but still, when else will you be scared of a flower?). Ever seen those in Hull?

17. Back to food. How about them kampua mee? Yes, I can see West Malaysians scratching their heads now. Ask a Sibuan, they’ll be more than happy to regal you with lavish descriptions of their signature dish.

18. Like the English football/rugby/cricket teams, our badminton teams always make it to finals of majors but choke. Still, I’m glad that we can call Eddy Choong, the Sidek brothers, Foo Kok Keong, Cheah Soon Kit, Soo Beng Kiang, Yap Kim Hock, and latterly Wong Choong Hann and Lee Chong Wei our own.

19. I like the idea of an open house, and being able to welcome and feel welcomed by others.

20. Belacan, another thoroughly versatile ingredient! Now I’m craving kangkong...

21. Is it nerdy to think that the infamous dawn raid on Guthrie in the London Stock Exchange in 1979 was cool? I’m always picturing a bunch of swashbuckling pirates making away with bucketloads of treasure!

22. Bata shoes! Ok, this was an unabashedly nostalgic pick. But don’t you just love them Bata?

23. I have to confess, I find it extremely entertaining when Malaysian politicians put their feet in their mouths. I say this non-maliciously; they’re better than any soap opera! Latest example: Nazri Aziz to YouTube: I'll sue you!

24. The liveliness of the Malaysian blogosphere. I really enjoy the diversity found there, from humour to socio-political to the personal.

25. I should include a towering Malaysian figure, and how about Lim Kit Siang? He is indefatigable, and there’s no doubting his impact on Malaysian politics. This guy, after Tan Seng Khoon, is Mr. Opposition. Devalued as it is, give the man a Datukship!

26. Teh C Peng. My staple drink for many, many years.

27. Being able to sit in Twin Otters (that's those 20-seaters) and peek into the pilot’s cockpit! We used to fly these whenever we balik kampung to see my (now deceased) grandfather.

28. I have absolutely no scientific evidence for this, but it seems to me that we do have very good human resources. Anecdotally speaking, it always seems as if a lot of the talented people in the world have at the very least, some sort of Malaysian connection. Probably ‘cause I only notice if it’s mentioned that they’re Malaysian, so this is a flimsy reason. But I’m still sticking it in!

29. Cheap! Cost of living in Malaysia is decent, and I really wish I could go out to eat without any qualms.

30. I think I should pay tribute to all those roti-men, Paddle Pop ice-cream drivers and butchers on cycles that tirelessly come around with their wares.

31. Char kuey teow. Mmmmhmmmm...
32. Satay. MMMMMHMMMMM.....
33. Kaya. MMMMMMMMMMMMMHHHHHMMMMMMMMM.........

34. OK, let me stop thinking about supper and get more local. The Sarawak Museum is actually really good and for those of you who’re in Kuching, it’s worth dropping by. And the (world's only?) Cat Museum is another place I find myself revisiting...

35. Ah well, I know MAS gets tons of brickbats, but having travelled on quite a few airlines, from BA to KLM to Qantas, MAS is still really good. It just needs to be free from political interference and duit kopi stuff. And of course, it’s nice to lay claim to Airasia in terms of its entrepreneurship.

36. I may as well pay tribute to some great Malaysian academics, including Prof. Ungku Aziz and Syed Hussein Alatas. Social scientists seem to be our strong points, even with the enforced nuzzle placed on them.

37. Funny that I don’t actually know anything about finance, but I’m fairly sure I’m correct in thinking that our securities market has some of the best (legal?) frameworks in place, and that of course, we were pioneers in Islamic banking.

38. I haven’t mentioned it yet in this list, and I’ve only been to one 4 or 5 times, but mamak stalls are great for food and late night chats! I expect more people dragging me to one when I drop by the Peninsular.

39. The Sports Days in my school were always one of the highlights of my calendar (my favourite being that time when I decided to play to the crowd, and taking the lead too early in the final lap of the 1500m, only to run out of steam at the end. (Strategy, boy, strategy...). It probably isn’t uniquely Malaysian, but it gives off a whiff of Malaysianness, to me anyway.

40. How about those old adverts for Tora dating lagi! Or Dindang? Oh gosh, I’m laughing just remembering them right now. Adverts here in the UK are so sophisticated, I wonder what the Brits would have made of those?

41. I’m going to plagiarise from a t-shirt I own (see how low I’ve stooped?) How about them Malaysian sign language? You know, think about those unique gestures when you need to ta-pao something, or the puking thing.

42. The legend of Bujang Senang and Jong’s Crocodile Farm. The latter was owned by the grandpa of one of my ex-classmates. Don’t know the former? Shame on you ignorant West Malaysians! I know Sang Kancil after all! Although BJ was the exact opposite of SK, being a real, enormous crocodile that terrorised the Sri Aman area back in the early 90s.

43. There must be quite a few World Music festivals out there, and I don’t actually know what standing the Rainforest Music Festival has, but I’ve always enjoyed my time there.

44. Another place I usually enjoy is the Sunday Market, where my mum likes to drag me to after church. My favourite is that guy who got into a shouting match with a rival to see how many superheroes they could name: "Superman lelong! Superman lelong! Batman lelong! Spiderman lelong!" I'm guessing Superman pineapples are better than Spiderman starfruits...

45. Wow, no food for the last couple of items. Time to rectify that. Kueh chap is great!

46. I just remembered, and I almost wish I hadn’t because there’s no way I can ever satisfy this craving – my mum’s angzhou bak.

47. It’s number 47 and I’ve only realised I haven’t included an obvious one! It’s the cultural uniqueness of Malaysians. Malaysian culture is really, really complex, and I’ll leave it to the anthropologists – but the whole campur-campur of East, West and everything in between means that it’s difficult to pin down characteristics. The best word for it: Rojak.

48. What about the Section 2 of the Star? I miss Star2 (with the exception of the Sunday incarnation, which for some reason is always poorer than the weekday editions), which I would always thumb through whenever we get it. Section 1 isn’t that great though.

49. Wai Nyan, you have no idea what a service you were rendering when you showed me Along Along Bukit Beruntung all those years ago. Only two other people (and one of them could possibly be reading this) truly understand what a lifesaver this was when we were all stressing out for Finals 15 months ago. Sorry if this is a bit of an insider's joke. Malaysian humour at its best.

50. And I guess the obligatory ending, because I’m Malaysian. I suppose it’s possible to engage in sophisticated discussions of social constructions of identity and psycho-analyse everything to death, but still – that’s what I am. Malaysian by birth, and Christian by new birth through grace. The two come together and engineer a love for Malaysia.


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And the angels dance!

I have just received the best news in the world!

L is from China and a friend of mine at university. He only arrived in England last October and struggled initially with the language and Western culture in general. He didn't look like the sort of person I'll initially click with: a chain smoker, a tai-ko look etc. But I also knew well that appearances deceive, and how difficult it is to be a stranger in an alien environment.

God has given me a knack for being able to understand people even when they don't articulate themselves well, and of course, coupled with the fact that I am Chinese after all, even if my Mandarin is rubbish, I was able to better understand him, help him with his English and negotiate the everyday foibles of life - purchasing cheaper train tickets, using the library etc. And he taught me a lot as well: he has much experience in life, and his generous spirit and his bravery at studying in a foreign tongue never fails to amaze me.

At some point, it came out that I was a Christian, and he confided in me that he had been shown kindness in New Zealand by Christians as well, where he had initially studied English. And he was eager to know more. I broached the topic of my faith in several conversations, and introduced him to Christian friends whom he could better converse with in Mandarin.

And one day, I took a chance. I asked him if he wanted to read the Bible with me. To my big surprise he said yes! And so we began looking at Mark's gospel together over a couple of months. It's a great experience to read the Bible with a non-Christian, especially one who has zero Bible knowledge, and I had to make sure that I explained Bible terminology such as "sin", "repent", "believe", "prophets", "Pharisees" as simply as I could without completely draining them of meaning!

Nevertheless, I took him to the Gospels simply because I wanted us together to see Jesus. Together we saw Jesus coming onto the scene, declaring himself to be the King who had been promised ("The time is fulfilled! The kingdom of God is at hand!"). We saw Jesus' compassion on the paralytic and his amazing twin claims to being the King ("Which is easier to say, your sins are forgiven, or go, take up your mat and walk?") and Rescuer ("I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners"). We saw Jesus exercising his Kingly power over creation ("Even the wind and waves obey him!"), evil spirits ("What do you want with me Jesus, Son of the Most High God?"), illness (the woman with infirmity) and even death (Jairus' daughter). And we see Jesus telling us why we are in need of a Savior ("What comes out of a man is what makes him 'unclean'"). We saw Jesus ready to help a man with even his unbelief ("I believe, help my unbelief"), for only Jesus can cure us of our spiritual blindness (Peter's confession of Christ comes after Jesus performs a rather unusual healing of a blind man, and it is clear that Mark deliberately sets the narrative that way).

It was a good experience, but it was not without its frustrations. Many times, I wondered if I was really communicating a gospel of grace or if I was subtly communicating a works-righteousness gospel. There were times when L seemed on the verge of becoming a Christian, only for him to shrink back. Many times I despaired at my own prayerlessness and my own failure to model a Christ-centered life. I worried if I was getting too pushy, or not challenging him hard enough. But through it all, I also knew that God was really the One who was overseeing things, and I was not the one who was ordering the future.

We haven't reached the momentous events of Mark 15 yet (although he does know how Mark's story ends). In fact, I had been neglecting meeting with him to read the Bible together recently, partly out of busyness but also partly out of discouragement. But tonight L gave me a call. He told me that he had read a book of testimonies that I had given to him. And that finally, he had decided, at 2am, just like one or two in that book, to get on his knees and talk to the Creator of the Universe, who also happened to give his only Son out of love for us.

And that, he thinks, he's finally become a follower of Jesus!

It's not an easy decision. I know in many ways, his understanding of following Jesus (as is mine) is still limited. But he knows it will cost - together we read Jesus' warning that following him means taking the way of the cross. When we next meet, I'll be reading the story of the rich young man with him. Only with God is all things possible.

And I know that really, L becoming a Christian was only possible because of God. It didn't have that much to do with me, I was just in the right place at the right time. But I rejoice anyway, knowing that my God is both a sovereign God and a loving God.

Update: See my follow-up post May the angels truly dance.



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United in Christ, even in disagreement

One of my favourite stories, which I have heard a couple of times over the last few years, is that of George Whitefield, the great evangelist, and John Wesley, the founder of Methodism. It's a tale I've often used to remind myself of the possibility and beauty of Christian fellowship with people who are different, and who differ with you. Whitefield was a Calvinist and Wesley, of course, an Arminian, who believed in the possibility of sinless perfection. They were good friends but disagreed profoundly over this issue.

One day, one of Whitefield's supporters walked over to him and asked, "Sir, do you think we shall see Mr. Wesley in heaven?". Whitefield turned to look at this fellow, and replied: "I fear not". He paused, then continued reverently: "For he will be so near the throne, and we shall be at such a distance, that we shall hardly get a sight of him!"