Tension is a passing note...

Everlasting arms

2010-11-23T10:06:00.005Z

Song of the month for me. Could potentially sound overly fuzzy/cheesy (and subject to the 'God is my boyfriend' critique), but I think it does capture my current sentiments fairly well. :>

Everlasting arms
Come all who are weary
Battle worn and weak
Come all of us broken, tired and in need
I for one am weary lonely and afraid
So let us run for shelter
In the Saviour's warm embrace

Come one and all
Let us fall into the
Everlasting Arms
I'm running into the everlasting arms
I'm falling into eternity's embrace
Where I'm safe
Here my heart has found its resting place

Here we find our healing
Here we find our peace
Wrapped in your unfailing love
Surrounded by your peace
So I for one am letting
All my walls fall down
In this place of safety
This child is finally found
So come one and all

And I am finally home
No longer alone
You surround me
All around me
With your love

Here in your everlasting arms
I'm running into your
Everlasting arms
I'm falling into
Eternity's embrace
Where I'm safe
Here my heart has found its resting place
Here my heart is found its resting place

Vicky Beeching

Your hand of mercy

2010-10-12T06:25:00.004Z

An old Emu song that has been resonating with me these few days. (Hard to find the music for it though!)

Although we had no claim
you held Your hand of mercy to us.
What we receive for all our work
on earth is pain and death.
Your love we do not deserve.
We could not save ourselves.
And yet You gave a gift of life
through Jesus hanging,
bleeding on a cross.

In selfishness and sin we have been
blinded from Your truth.
We hate, we hurt, we hide from You
pretending we’re in control.
But please now open our eyes.
Replace this heart of stone.
Make us Your new creation and let
nothing keep us from
the love of God.

We praise you God our Father
for the gift of Your dear Son.
for Jesus Christ who shared our earth
and died that we might live.
And now You’ve opened our eyes,
Replaced this heart of stone,
Made us Your new creation
and now nothing keeps us from the love of God.

Although we had no claim
You held Your
hand of mercy to us.

the irony of salvation

2010-10-07T14:13:00.003Z

Reading this caused me to pause and wonder at Jesus once again...

In the same way the chief priests, the teachers of the law and the elders mocked him. "He saved others," they said, "but he can't save himself! He's the King of Israel! Let him come down now from the cross, and we will believe in him.
- Matt 27:41-42

Precisely because he chose not to save himself, he saved others. He saved me! He is the King, not just Israel, but of everything. And because he chose not to come down from the cross, I believe, I trust in him. There's nowhere else to go. God came down, in the person of Jesus, so that I might be lifted upward to see him, and look forward with hope to the redemption of the cosmos.

Off the cuff on pastoral ministry

2010-09-16T13:28:00.002Z

I read a few pages of Brothers, We are Not Professionals this morning. And I am struck again by how anyone could aspire, attain to pastoral ministry. Piper says of those of us in this vocation - "we do not try to secure a professional lifestyle, but we are ready to hunger and thirst and be ill-clad and homeless". He goes on to list daunting statement after daunting statement - we are to pant after God in prayer. We are to weep over our sin. We are to be God-besotted lovers of Christ. We are afflicted but not crushed, always carrying in our body the death of Jesus. And on it goes. Is there any "professionalism" in any of this? Who is worthy of such a calling?

Elsewhere, Carl Trueman has an interesting trilogy of posts calling the pastor to be a jack-of-all-trades in an age of increasing specialisation and fragmentation. I remember once reading somewhere else where this particular person opined that a pastor should be well-versed not just in biblical studies and theology, but abreast of the latest developments in politics, aware of cultural anthropological and sociological theory, be well-read in the field of bioethics, ready to involve himself in all sorts of socio-political activism etc. etc. Just reading it was exhausting! And obviously unrealistic. Nor does it quite seem to reflect the biblical emphases on the qualifications of pastoral ministry. Nonetheless, it is true that a pastor, as Trueman points out, should at least be seeking to read his context and culture as best as he can, to be aware of current affairs and of history, to be cognisant of a diversity of trends; in other words, to be at least competent over wide subject areas - a GP if not a specialist doctor. And you still have to think. Who is worthy of such a calling?

Then I read Kevin DeYoung's advice to young pastors - part 1 & part 2. It's the sort of common sense we need, Number 4, for instance. That the priorities of the pastor should be proclamation, prayer and people still ring true even if it's not new. OK, so now that sounds simple, right? Then I think of how exhausting it is to plod on, wrestling with exegetical difficulties, stressing over the packaging of that sermon or Bible study, despairing over some theological or ethical Gordion knot. I think of my own prayerlessness. I think over how I could have encouraged that person better, handled that person better, counselled that person better. And the refrain remains: who is worthy of such a calling?

And then I turn to Ed Stetzer's interview with church planter Darrin Patrick. DP laments the fact that "most pastors don't know how to build systems, structures, and processes that are not contingent upon them. Most pastors can care for people, but don't build systems of care. Most pastors can develop leaders individually, but lack the skill to implement a process of leadership development." And I think, hey, wait a minute, that's exactly the sort of thing I'll be weak at! Who is worthy of such a calling?

Then I suddenly hear the music playing softly in the background on my computer.

Spirit of grace, You’ve shed Your light
Upon our darkened eyes, unveiling Jesus Christ
Come change our hearts, conform our ways
To honor Jesus’ Name, His glory our refrain
Let His love compel our own
As we worship at His throne

Only Jesus!...

Who can be in pastoral ministry on his own? Indeed, who can be a Christian on his own? None of us. Only when we derive our identity not from ministry success or some similar thing, but from the fact that we are loved by God and are called his child because of the death of His Son, only then can we go on. Who is worthy of such a calling? Only Jesus. And therefore, only because of Jesus can we be counted similarly worthy.

Not yet dead

2010-09-10T13:21:00.004Z

Nope, this blog isn't dead, yet.

I did toy with the idea of completely calling it a day, but when I've been poring through the archives, I was actually surprised. Mostly, pleasantly surprised. There are a lot of thoughts (and memories) crammed in there!

It was a really interesting exercise actually. Some posts I remembered distinctly. Some I don't remember writing at all. Quite a lot I still agree with, but would now refine or nuance it more. (But you can't say everything!) Maybe one or two which I would now throw away. Some of my convictions have strengthened. Some of my convictions, relaxed a little. What is especially interesting is what I have chosen to say, and not say, on this blog. What you get, I think, is a true shape of my thoughts, but not the complete shape. For eg., there's one period where you could reasonably infer I was becoming quite "emerging", which isn't the whole truth. I was fascinated by that particular stream, and tried to be generous with it, as I try to be with all things. But I don't think I was as "emerging" as it might look.

The main point is that writing still helps me to focus my thoughts and to do some thinking aloud. It's a good discipline to try to maintain. I know I just won't be able to keep up a good pace of blogging with my schedule nowadays, but I want to keep on trying to write and reflect in this space. I often still do have lots and lots of thoughts floating around in my head which needs some space to breathe, and this is still the ideal place for it.

:-)

Keep going - Acts 18:1-23

2010-06-09T10:04:00.003Z

Sermon on Acts 18:1-23. (I'm aware my blog has been nothing but a sermon repository lately!)

Was pretty tired, so by the time we got to the evening - I was finding even singing difficult!

Sermon prep. I think I figured early on that this passage functioned as encouragement, so getting the main point wasn't quite as hard as the last sermon. But trying to figure out the constituent parts as well as appropriate illustrations/implications/applications turned out to be hard work! I was much more indebted to the commentaries this time around; in fact, I think I was a bit too reliant on them. For background on Corinth, I looked at Scot Hafemann's entry on the Corinthians in Dictionary of Paul and his letters. For theological insights into the text, Peterson (Pillar) and Larkin (IVPNTC) were helpful. I also thought of specific people in the congregation as I wrote this. If time permitted, I would have liked to spend an additional minute or so thinking through the socio-political consequences in our context as the outworking of point 4.

Pacing of this sermon could have been better too. On the whole, I thought this passage came up at an opportune time though, and I hope that every single one of us, me included, were encouraged by this portion of God's word. God was gracious, for I know at least one person for whom this struck home.

Outline:
Weary in the city?

A tourist's guide to Corinth (v.1)

What does God say?
1. Keep trusting! Because God is always working out his plan wherever we are (v.2-4)
2. Keep persevering! Because God's gospel always provokes division (v.5-8)
- The watchman in Ezekiel (rf. Ezekiel 3:16-21, 33:1-20)
3. Take courage! For God is with us always (v.9-11)
4. Be confident! For God can and does use anyone to advance his purposes (v.12-17)
5. Be thankful! For God is all of grace (v.18-23)

Keep going!

Latest sermon - Gospel unleashed!

2010-05-16T16:24:00.004Z

My latest sermon, on Acts 16:6-40. This was recorded, as is custom, at the first/morning service.

I was unwell that day (at the 2nd service people commented on how tired I looked), but I don't think I realised how low on energy I was until I listened to myself here! I'm pretty flat. At the evening service apparently I was a bit more alive. Thanks to a couple of friends who showed up for moral support.

In terms of prep, surprisingly, I barely consulted any commentaries for this one. Graham Beynon in the Explore Bible reading notes (April-June 2010) and a sermon by Sinclair Ferguson which I listened to were largely helpful. Whenever I looked at a commentary, it was FF Bruce in the NICNT that I turned to, which gave useful background info. Sermon structure was especially hard to crack; took me ages to find something for the sermon to hang on. This is the longest sermon I've ever written.

There was a powerpoint, which was basically the map, and some Scripture references.

Here's the outline:
Gospel Unleashed!

Intro: words words words

The gospel is God's heart for the world (v.6-10)

The gospel is God's power
...to open hearts (v.11-14)

...to unite believers (v.15)

...to liberate (v.16-20)

...that provokes (v.21-24)

...even in bleak times (v.25-34)

The gospel drives Paul's actions (v.35-40)

Song sung in response: Be Thou my Vision

On Facebook

2010-04-29T13:38:00.002Z

What you should know about Facebook's changes.

Facebook's eroding privacy policy: a timeline

Doug Groothuis review of Church of Facebook.

Exhausted!

2010-04-23T10:29:00.002Z

Been playing catch-up all month long. With plenty more to do.

The future of publishing?

2010-04-12T14:14:00.003Z

A very clever video on the future of publishing, produced by the folks at Dorling Kindersely. You need to watch the whole thing as there's a twist!

Word ministry - on clarity and failure

2010-04-08T14:22:00.004Z

Two recent posts from The Gospel Coalition that are particularly relevant to Word ministry.

Andrew Lisi: I believe the great task of any Christian – from early believer to seasoned theologian or pastor – is to take the unique language of Scripture and theology and make it accessible to those who have not been exposed to any of it without losing the essence of what God is communicating in His Word. I am constantly learning how difficult of a task it really is, especially because I also believe we must retain the clear language of the Bible.

David Murray: And we take all our failures to our unfailing Lord for His full and free forgiveness. We take our failed evangelism, our failed sermons, our failed pastoral visits, and our failed counseling to the Lord, and pour out our hearts to Him: "Lord, I’ve messed up another sermon...I’ve forgotten to visit that needy soul…I was too scared to speak about you to my fellow-passenger...I’ve misjudged the mood of my elders...I’ve unnecessarily offended that family who left...I was insensitive in counseling...I’m paying for breaking a confidence..."

But as we confess our failures, we experience the Lord’s unchanging and unconditional love. And we re-emerge...humbler and weaker, but wiser and happier too.

As always, both posts worth reading in its entirety.

Resurrection: not just an afterthought

2010-04-05T12:24:00.005Z

I wrote the following for publication elsewhere. For those wanting to explore further, I'm sure Sam Allberry's Lifted would be a reliable guide, although I haven't as yet read it.
-----

“[After] All that stuff about science and physics, and the complications of physics and things, what it really comes down to is the resurrection of Jesus...It’s so petty, it’s so trivial, it’s so local, it’s so earth-bound, it’s so unworthy of the universe.”

So says noted atheist scientist, Richard Dawkins, in a debate. And though we no doubt deeply disagree with him, we sometimes find it harder to explain why, exactly, it's so important. If all our debt has been paid on the cross, why the resurrection? Here, very very briefly, is a non-exhaustive list why resurrection is key.

Firstly, resurrection tells us that the Davidic King is now ruling. King David prophesied that the Messiah would be enthroned when God raised him from the dead (Psalm 110:1, Acts 2:34-35). Here is a King whose reign is all-encompassing and all-conquering. The empty tomb of Jesus testifies to the fact that He is that King! No wonder the disciples were transformed! God raised him, they saw him, they lived for him.

Secondly, resurrection tells us that new life really is found in Christ. Negatively speaking, “if Christ has not been raised, your faith is futile and you are still in your sins.” (1 Cor. 15:7). We know that sin leads to death. Jesus, in dying on the cross, has taken our punishment upon himself. But in rising again, he demonstrates that the cross has done its work. Sin is completely dealt with! We know we are truly justified (Rom 4:25), and death is no longer the end. We can rest, wholly assured.

Thirdly, resurrection tells us that we presently have new power. In Colossians 3:1, Paul can say of Christians, “you have been raised with Christ” (past tense). In one sense, we have been resurrected already. The Holy Spirit who raised Jesus from the dead (Rom. 8:9-11) is the same Spirit who dwells in all believers. Resurrection gives us a glimpse of life in the future. But that future resurrection life begins to bear fruit in us today as we walk God's way.

Fourthly, resurrection tells us that a new creation is coming. Peter praises God for his great mercy in granting Christians “a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead.” (1 Peter 1:3). Jesus' resurrection will not be the last. His resurrection, instead, guarantees that it will be the first of the many who trust in him (1 Cor. 15:20-21). And through the resurrection of God's children, all of creation groans in hope too, as it awaits complete renewal (Rom. 8:18-23). Far from abandoning the earth, God will one day reshape it.

Resurrection, unworthy of the universe? On the contrary, the universe is unworthy of such a momentous event. Christ is risen, hallelujah!

A Crescendo of Wonder: a Good Friday sermon

2010-04-02T16:58:00.000Z

The events of Good Friday are utterly breath-taking. We celebrate nothing less than this: "that God was pleased to reconcile to himself all things, whether on earth or in heaven, by making peace through the blood of his cross" (Col. 1:20).

We are talking here about something that happens at the very foundations of the universe. Call it cosmic redemption, ontological healing, metaphysical reconciliation, the Bible's version of Star Wars, or whatever helps you think about the largest, most ultimate reality, the "Really Real," capital R, capital R.

And it is all accomplished through what seems like a paradox. "Making peace through the blood of his cross" is like saying that a nuclear missile has become an olive-branch, that Guantanamo has become a garden of healing, that a sword has been turned into a plowshare, that a tank has been turned into a tractor. The very thought of it leaves us weak in the knees with astonishment.

Keep reading...

Back in Malaysia

2010-04-01T06:41:00.005Z

I figure it's probably the right time to mention this.

After 8 years spent in the UK, I am now back in Malaysia for the long haul. That's always been the plan. It, however, has happened a little earlier than I expected. I had been looking to return in the 2nd half of 2010, after I had finished off my 2-year apprenticeship. God's timeline was different. Regular readers of this blog will know that I had visa problems which meant that I returned late last year. At that point, I was still looking to go back, but in the end, it was not to be.

In a recent prayer letter, this is what I wrote:

About a month ago, I preached on Matthew 26:1-16 at 3 services, about the woman who pours perfume all over Jesus....The main thrust of that passage is how utterly amazing Jesus is, and that we should treasure Him above all. At one point in the sermon, I said something like this: "What if we prayed and worked hard for something, but don't get it? How we respond might give us a clue as to where our treasure really lies." Well, that was probably the most difficult part to say personally, because I knew that part was speaking to me as much as anyone else. Especially when you have to say it 3 times!

...I am, of course, very sad at this change of events, although at the same time, I know God has been faithful all this while and that this time of stretching for the past few months have been good for me. One thing I can say, it hasn't been boring in the least!...There have been many good things about coming home – from being able to be clearer with my parents what my long-term plans are, learning what the situation for Christians is like on the ground, being able to connect with other like-minded evangelicals. There are the trade-offs too: from not being able to benefit from getting further training in Oxford, being unable to build on some of the relationships I've formed there, having to move again for the 3rd time in 3 years.

For the year, I'm going to be based at SMACC. At the moment, I'm not sure what lies beyond 2010. Having spent enough time in full-time paid gospel ministry, I can say for sure that there's nothing else I would rather do, even if it is often hard work. Long-term, I hope to go to theological college, perhaps in 2012 or 2013.

I'll probably reflect on my time in the UK in another post. But my British decade is over. I'm back in Malaysia, a little (maybe even more than a little!) uncertain about what the future holds, but trusting in the God who was willing even to give his only Son to die for me, that I might have new life with him.

Where did all the Christian writers go?

2010-04-01T06:33:00.003Z

Where did all the Christian writers go?. Evan Maloney wonders aloud how Christianity, for so long the bedrock of Western literature, seems to have disappeared from contemporary writing. Although the analysis is pretty reductionistic in places, it's still an interesting read. It also reminds us how some "secular vs 'Christian' fiction" debates would have made no sense at all in times gone by. Whenever the Guardian posts any article about religion, the comment thread is usually very frustrating to read, but not this time. People like Marilynn Robinson get a mention!

National education feature

2010-04-01T06:24:00.007Z

I meant to link to this earlier. The Nut Graph had a very interesting 4-part feature reviewing the national education system. I am personally convinced that any substantial reform of Malaysia must reckon with the way education works here.

Going private
Chinese medium schools to the rescue
The homeschooling option
Whither national education?

Why Theology Matters

2010-03-19T09:29:00.004Z

DugDownDeep_Carnahan.mov from Covenant Life Church on Vimeo.

Fantastic video about why theology matters for all of us. Originally for Joshua Harris' Dug Down Deep.

Christianity Today has done some very good cover stories lately, and their latest one, The Mind Under Grace is very much worth reading. It's about how doctrine and life come together. A sample:

...we have to ask: Is it possible to live out discipleship without a good measure of heady doctrine? I see doctrine not as a boundary but as a compass. Its purpose is not to make Christians relevant or distinctive but rather to make them faithful in their contexts. Doctrine is a way of articulating what God's presence in the church and the world looks like. It can orient us by helping us, like Jon, major in the majors...

...Doctrine, while static at times, is meant to help us think about our lives more deeply by considering alongside other Christians the implications of our thoughts and deeds. Doctrine is wisdom that helps us clarify our mission.

Sarah Pulliam Bailey's side story Practically Theological investigates how teaching doctrine is making a comeback among younger evangelicals. My own experience in the UK, as well as in KL, where I have been doing some teaching, corresponds to this. And that is good news.

As a side point, a few others and I have been reading a little of J. Greshem Machen's 1923 book Christianity and Liberalism, and he makes some great points of doctrine and life. That is, they should be in tandem, not in opposition, to each other.

The Quid Pro Quo God

2010-03-07T14:36:00.002Z

A couple of recent conversations suggest how hard it is to exorcize the quid pro quo god. Quid pro quo is a Latin phrase meaning "something for something." The quid pro quo god is one who does something for us if we do something for him, and the one who refuses to do something for us, or even punishes us, if we fail to do something for him.

Put this way, it seems impossible that anyone in their right mind would believe in such a god. The rub, of course, is that none of us are in our right mind—that's one of the effects of sin. And one reason we're attracted to the quid pro quo god is that he's a god we can get our minds around. He makes sense. He seems reasonable and fair: We do our part, he does his, and all will be well.

The problem is our part, which we tend not to do well at all. And when repeated efforts at doing our part fail, we discover that the quid pro quo god turns out to be a demon. Naturally, we try to exorcise this demon without success.

Read the whole thing.

Preaching on the ultimate treasure

2010-02-22T15:17:00.005Z

Talk about getting thrown into the deep end! After preaching a full sermon for the first time a few weeks ago, I preached at 3 services yesterday. Obviously ppl haven''t been put off by me...yet. :) We're about to start a series finishing off Matthew (chapters 26-28), and I had Matthew 26:1-16, where the woman pours perfume all over Jesus. I think I found the passage personally beneficial as well, as like most of us, I struggle to treasure Jesus from day to day.

For what it's worth, you can actually download it here. Unfortunately, the sound quality is not very good. But if you right click and save it, and then turn the volume up, you can catch most of what I'm saying, I think. This was recorded at the first service, where I was probably the least fluent, so you can catch a few stumbles here and there. It's the same sermon at all 3 services, but with some slight variations. The first service has more families and some expats, so one section of application and language was adjusted accordingly. I applied one point differently at the other services, and allowed myself a tiny bit more local expression. The first minute is me just making some preliminary remarks and praying, and the sermon starts a minute in.

The Bible version used is the ESV. There was an outline to follow, roughly reproduced here:
---
Introduction: King of Kings, Majesty?

Jesus' teaching in Matthew's Gospel

The setting (v.1-2)

The characters
The chief priests and the elders (v.3-5)

The woman and the disciples (v.6-13)

- Grace and poverty (2 Cor. 8:1-9)

Judas (v-14-16)

- OT background: Faithful and unfaithful shepherds (Zec. 10:1-11:14)

Jesus, our Treasure
---

The song sung right before the sermon was King of Kings, Majesty (Jarrod Cooper) and the song offered in response was I Will Offer up my life (Matt Redman)

Dug Down Deep

2010-01-25T12:49:00.004Z

A friend of mine, enthusing over a speaker at a meeting recently, said something along these lines to me: "Theology is good and all, but this guy got powerlah!" (In other words, this guy had great rhetoric). I, unfortunately, couldn't think of what to say in response during that time. But it showed something that seems embedded in the thinking of many Christians here, that somehow doctrine and experience are to be separated. We wouldn't go so far as to say doctrine doesn't matter, but it's the other stuff that really gets us pumping as Christians. Which dismays me, because the opposite is true. What we really believe really does matter, because it drives all other areas of our life. There's a reason Scripture exhorts us to watch our doctrine closely. In fact, I would say the aforementioned speaker was the least powerful where his theology was weakest.

Which is why I'm pleased to hear of Josh Harris' latest book, Dug Down Deep, and why I'm choosing to feature the book here. This is a book about doctrine, told through the lens of Josh's personal experience. Josh speaks of his hopes for the book: "I hope the book will be accessible to people who might not normally read theological books. That includes Christians who are turned-off by doctrinally faithful but arrogant believers as well as people who are skeptical of the usefulness of Christian doctrine. I also hope that it will be given to friends outside the faith who have never really understood basic Christian beliefs."

Furthermore, Josh Harris, because he is known as the guy who wrote that dating book, reaches a wider constituency than other Christian writers who fall in his camp. His style is also deliberately very simple, which I think is a plus. We need Josh Harrises alongside the Don Carsons.

I've come to realise that because Malaysians don't read in general, so just recommending or giving a good Christian book isn't a very good strategy to help each other mature in Christ, the goal of every Christian. It either doesn't get read or just read superficially. But the reading of good Christian books can still be useful in the larger context of a relationship, of ongoing teaching and discipling. And I hope that Dug Down Deep might still prove useful in this regard.

Challies and DashHouse have fuller reviews if you want to know more about the book. You can find out more about the book and preview Chapter 1 here.

January update

2010-01-25T12:43:00.003Z

Just a quick update - I've been in Kuala Lumpur since just after the New Year. I went to a great if intense conference, and then been helping out at a church here while I wait for my visa. I have some good news on that front - there's been progress and I should be returning to the UK next month. Been very busy, and trying to get used again to being in a big city! I'm also preaching a full sermon for the first time this weekend, and haven't as yet done much prep, so need to be getting to it ASAP!

Honouring your parents: a short bibliography

2010-01-03T11:23:00.003Z

Since there isn't much out there in terms of what it means to honour your parents as a Christian in an Asian context, I thought I'll just list what helped me.

Greg Jao, 'Honor and Obey' in Following Jesus Without Dishonoring Your Parents, Jeanette Yep (ed.). Helpful, especially in looking at the relevant biblical texts.

*Marvin Wong, Honoring Parents in Between Friends: Reflections on Christian Discipleship in the 'Real' World. He summarises and builds on Jao's work with more sustained reflection. This is the single best thing I read.

Goh Kim Guat, Confessions of an Errant Child in Kairos Magazine, June 2003, Building Strong Families. An honest sharing of the struggles of caring for an aged mother, alongside a meditation on grace. Available here. One of my church members also shared a similar experience in our church newsletter which I also found helpful.

Also,

Sarah Lanier, From Foreign to Familiar
Denis Lane, One World, Two Minds

These are two short introductory books on crossing cultures. Though these books tend to be geared towards missionaries, they're also very helpful for building understanding across generations, I find.

Latest on use of word "Allah"

2010-01-02T03:44:00.001Z

If a Malaysian High Court ruling stands, Roman Catholics here can resume using the word "Allah" as their translation for God in their local language.

The court on New Year's Eve overturned a three-year-old government ban that prevented the Catholic Church from using the term Allah in its literature. The Arabic word has been used by various faiths in this Muslim-majority nation for centuries, and the church argues that it is the only suitable way to denote God in the Malay language.

Read the whole thing.

Interview with Patrick Fung

2009-12-31T06:30:00.002Z

Interview with Patrick Fung from Urbana 09 on Vimeo.

Patrick Fung is currently the general director of OMF.

Merry Christmas!

2009-12-25T04:23:00.001Z

How sweet the day when Christ was born
When God Himself took human form
He came to wash our sins away
Our death to die, our debt to pay

How sweet the day when Hope appeared
The One who frees us from our fears
He came to break the power of sin
And give us power to follow Him

Oh sing for joy, lift up your voice
Let us sing for joy, the whole earth rejoice
Let us sing for joy to the Son
For Jesus our Savior has come

How sweet the day when Christ returns
We’ll see the One for whom we yearn
Then we’ll look full upon His face
Our hearts will burst with songs of praise

Come, Lord Jesus, come

© Stephen Altrogge / Sovereign Grace

2009

2009-12-16T05:45:00.004Z

It's been an interesting year, I guess. Ignoring my current state of limbo for the moment, I still sometimes pinch myself that I get to do what I do. I am extremely privileged to work for a great gospel-centred, mission-minded church, firm in its convictions yet generous in its partnership. I can obviously tell you of its failings as well - I'm part of it aren't I? - but of the 3 churches I've been a part of in the UK, it's still this one which I truly regard as my home church away from home. They just need to overhaul their website. :-p And working for them has only deepened my appreciation. When I was wrestling with the decision to pursue an apprenticeship, I said to God, (for a variety of reasons) this is really more or less the only place I'll consider doing it. And to my disbelief, God opened the door and said, here you go!

What are some of the things I've learnt and struggled with? I think one of the hardest things is the blurring of lines between what constitutes work and non-work. In one sense, that's a good thing, because it encourages a more integrated, "holistic" if you will, approach to life as opposed to compartmentalising it, a feature of modernity. That's one of the central thrusts of the missional movement, to consider the rhythms of our day-to-day life through the lens of mission. But it's hard too because sometimes you need to switch off but you can't. For the layperson, it would never cross their minds to consider church as "work". For me, it is and isn't, if that makes sense. It does mean learning to rest is very, very important. I now have an inkling what burnout might look like, having veered dangerously close to it in February. And like it or not, being a "full-time" worker also changes the dynamic of your relationship with others as well.

I find one-to-one work rewarding. There's nothing like being able to teach and read and listen and wrestle with God's word together, encouraging someone to grow in grace, to see how God's word and their world might intersect, to pray, and to talk about life together. Of course it can be frustrating. Often I think you don't actually get to see the results of your work. But it's great nonetheless.

Some of my other highlights: the conference I went on right at the beginning of the year, one of the best. The student conference where I was a leader. 2 hours in an ice-cream parlour where it seemed right to follow an important conversation about grace rather than take out my pre-planned Bible study. Money not being a problem this year because of generous friends. A mission trip which I was apprehensive about beforehand but which turned out to be absolutely worth it. Giving talks for the first time. 4 Person of Christ lectures which stretched my mind. Going to watch All-England Championships: Lee Chong Wei! A new Christian going great guns.

Lowlights: Cultural stress. Loneliness, for ministry inevitably carries some of that. A wish for more parental support (although relatively speaking, I think my problem is probably quite mild). Friends who don't want Christ. Orlando Magic losing to LA Lakers: well not really, since I didn't expect them to make the Finals in the first place! :) Of course, visa woes. If the UK Border Agency was a person, I really want to strangle it now. Strangle it! MUAHAHAHA....*looks around sheepishly*

I've got far to go when it comes to depending on God, but hopefully 2009 is yet another small step forward.

'Cause this is a healing song, oh and I've got a heart that fails
But love is pushing me along, I'm lifting up above this veil
This is a healing song, oh and I don't know if you can tell
But love is pushing me along
I'm pressing up against the rail, pressing up against the rail

...You and I, we've come so far
We've come so far, we cannot look back
- Healing Song, Bebo Norman

The wrap makes a return

2009-12-12T06:44:00.004Z

I don't think I've done an around the web post this year at all. Here you are then:

304,358 Malaysians migrated from March 2008 till August this year. That's a lot, so it's no wonder the debate has been rekindled. I think over half of my classmates from secondary school days are now overseas. Tay Tian Yan exhorts us to wake up to this reality. Farish Noor has the commentary: migration as protest. The follow-up. Helen Ang also has this must-read article analysing demographic trends in Malaysia. Don't miss that one. Finally, for a Christian perspective, Bishop Hwa Yung's article Should Christians emigrate?, first published in Kairos's Emerging Church Issues and reprinted here in NECF's newsletter, is a worthwhile read.

Jared Wilson usually has good gospel-centred stuff. 10 things good pastors say. Don't Waste Your Calvinism.

4 questions with D.A Carson.

The Gospel Old and New - Kevin DeYoung. Helps articulate some of my dis-ease with a few currently popular gospel presentations, although I hope we're humble enough to be aware of our own weaknesses as well.

Brothers together in Christ. Learning to love each other as Christian men.

Self Knowledge for godliness and ministry from Mark and Jennie Baddeley. I look after their kid in Sunday School btw, although they don't really know me. :) I linked only to part 6, but you can access parts 1-5 from this post. Worth reading, especially their reflections on personality tests in parts 3 onwards.

The 50 biggest movies of 2010.

Thought-provoking article examining friendship in the age of online social networking.

What were your worst books of the decade? I'm glad some people felt the way I did about Vernon God Little. Mohsin Hamid's The Reluctant Fundamentalist wasn't bad but disappointing as I had high expectations for it.

Shattering the Tiger [Woods] dream. Lessons learned.

(Sovereign Grace) Music

2009-12-10T11:42:00.004Z

We Sing from the album Sons & Daughters - starts properly 45 seconds in

We’ve come together in Your name
We’ve come together to proclaim
How great You are
Once we were going our own ways
Now we’re a people for Your praise
How great You are

We sing as sons and daughters
Sing to God our Father
All because of Jesus
We sing, His blood has bought us
Sing, Your mercy called us
All because of Jesus we sing

Jesus, You’re powerful to save
Jesus, You’ve risen from the grave
How great You are
Your blood gave us peace with God
Your love has broken down our walls
How great You are

By grace we have been saved
To be Your dwelling place
You took our curse and made us one
It’s nothing we could do
Our only boast is You
So we rejoice in what You’ve done

© Joel Sczebel, Pat Sczebel, and Todd Twining

I really like what Sovereign Grace Music is doing - great lyrics with great congregational singability. I own and love Songs for the Cross-centered Life and Valley of Vision. Even their older album All We Long to See, which I listened to online, didn't quite sound as dated as I expected; enjoyed it too. Still, too little people know about them, so doing my little bit here to commend them. One song Malaysian Christians might recognise is written by a Sov Grace writer before they became Sov Grace: I stand in Awe (You are beautiful beyond description).

Some of their strongest songs: I Will Glory in my Redeemer, Jesus Thank You, The Glories of Calvary, O Great God, Let Your Kingdom Come, their reworking of the hymn Before the Throne of God Above.

Other recent music
My favourite British Christian musician Matt Redman
We Shall Not Be Shaken - Review, Interview

Paul Baloche, who is pretty popular I gather
Glorious - Review, Interview

Sara Groves, singer-songwriter; I should really own at least one of her albums!
Fireflies & Songs, Review, Interview

Thinking through ministry and parents

2009-12-06T11:30:00.010Z

[This is a bit more of a personal post]

The past month has been difficult. I've felt really disheartened at various points. I've had a few...battles (the word doesn't seem quite right. Disagreements? Skirmishes?) with my parents once they realised that ministry wasn't just some passing fancy I'm into at the moment. While I didn't start my church apprenticeship 15 months ago by announcing to my parents: "I'm going to be a pastor/church planter/missionary for the rest of my life!", I think just doing the apprenticeship signalled that I was definitely exploring the call to full-time paid gospel ministry (thereafter I will simply use "ministry" or "full-time ministry" interchangeably to refer to this). When I sought counsel about the way in which I should engage my parents, the advice I receive was to keep them informed and to gradually open up to them some of my plans, so that it wouldn't be a bolt out of nowhere. I still think that was sound advice. And I believe that for the most part I have. I was up-front, for example, with the fact that I went to talk to a pastor in KL with a view to future options nearly a year ago now.

An apprenticeship is meant to be a testing ground to explore the call into full-time ministry, and simultaneously a stepping stone should it seem as if that call is to be pursued further. And to be honest, everything seems to be pointing that way. The work is very hard, make no mistake, but I love what I do. I appear to have teaching and preaching gifts, even if they still need to be worked hard at. Character, that most important of traits, is harder for me to judge, but I haven't been pulled aside and told that I have such serious transgressions as to be disqualified, if that counts for anything! :) Which is why I'm thinking about this seriously.

But it's hard to communicate with my parents about all this. My parents don't fit neatly into any box - on some fronts, they seem like very traditional Asian parents; on others, they have proved to be more open-minded. I'll say, for instance, that they were more positive about me embarking on my apprenticeship than I expected. Still, they've got a very different worldview from mine. And to be fair, the only models they have to go on are those in Malaysia. I noticed, for example, that they just don't seem to understand, despite me trying to explain it as clearly as I can multiple times (and believe me I've tried!), that people do get paid for this stuff, as yes, they do get paid enough to cover their basic needs at the least! Now, to be honest, I don't know much about pay structure and things like that in Malaysia for those in full-time ministry, but I am realistic enough to know that it's pretty low. (If you know more, please enlighten me in the comments!) In some harder situations, for example, a pastor will have to go bivocational. But that's not going to happen with me with the current options I have. I do think it will be hard. I come from a middle-class background, as is obvious from being able to go to university in the UK. So nice holidays abroad, for example, might no longer be easy to come by on a salary of your average full-timer. But it's not the end of the world.

There's also the "you can still work a full-time job and do ministry on the side" argument: this seems to be a favourite of Asian parents everywhere, as some of my other friends in ministry testify. Well, I had to explain the "full-time" in "full-time ministry", and the value of ministry of the word, but how do you do that when their worldviews are so different? It's made even more complex when I naturally advocate every-member ministry, i.e full-time ministry does not make you more inherently spiritual; there is a sense in which every Christian is full-time. But then to say that there is also a sense in which some people are set apart for full-time ministry. Regular readers of the blog will remember that I preached from Ephesians 4:7-16 over a month ago, which touches on this very issue. Frustratingly for me, it seems as if every church member apart from my parents understood what I was going on about!

And then there's the "you should gain experience in the real world first" argument. This one I've thought about long and hard, because this argument has validity. After all, I am very young. And I think every young person thinking about full-time ministry must wrestle hard with this. In the end, though, I think this one has to be decided on a case-by-case basis. Why? There are quite a few reasons. Firstly, it isn't always the case that you must experience something to be able to minister effectively into that situation. After all, no one person will ever experience the full range of possible experiences. If you get married and have kids, then you have traded off the experience of being single into your old age, and vice versa. Would you say the married/single person has nothing to offer the person of different marital status simply because he or she has never had that experience? Now, that's not to say experience in the working world is not valuable, and it could definitely give you unique insights that are not available elsewhere. What is it like to work for a prickly non-Christian boss? When everyone is busy handing out duit kopi? But I'm trying to say that it's not the clinching argument. For some, they will benefit from time in the working world. For others, it's not necessary.

Also, I do sometimes bristle at the fact that Christian ministry isn't the "real world". I've met up with a non-Christian managing director of a publishing company at least 10 years, if not more, older than me to read the Bible together and to talk about life. I've sat with a homeless person and warmed up his sandwich. I laughed together with PhD students and discussed pressing academic matters. I work in a cross-cultural situation as the only non-Western staff member of my church. Granted, my experiences of the world look different, but is this less "real-world"? The other thing to consider is the difference in age and how that dynamic works in an Asian culture. I've thought about it. And I think this means that it's definitely true that I probably won't gain a hearing from them initially. But does that disqualify younger ones like me automatically from ministry? No, it means I have to work hard at every aspect of my godliness, to be a bit more tentative in some of the things I say, to be quick to listen and slow to speak to older heads.

You probably think from my above two paragraphs that I've already made up my mind to go full-time straight away. Believe it or not, I haven't. I spoke to our long-term mission partner, who is a British-born Chinese (Malaysian and HK parents), when I was on a mission to X Country in the summer. He has first-hand experience of parental opposition. And he offered really good advice. One reason in favour of working a "secular" job is simply to grow up a bit. Now I think sometimes I am in need of that! But he cautioned against taking a secular job simply to "earn credibility". That advice takes on renewed force now that I know some of my mum's friends have been whispering amongst themselves about the son who went to a highly esteemed university but is thinking about taking a job that doesn't command much respect! (These are professing Christians, btw, and I confess to dreaming up some rather unChristian retorts). But that has made me pause about completely rushing in. At the same time, since I've been back, one thing that has been hugely emphasised is the urgency of the task. Malaysia is really lacking in full-time Christian workers, and more than one person has independently expressed their concern to me about the next generation and whether we lose the ground that was so hard-won. So there is definitely a part of me that simply wants to press on and not dither.

Oh, and of course, there's the classic Ephesians 6:2 argument, a favourite of all Asian Christian parents. I always think, how about verse 4? But what has helped early on is recognising honouring your parents does not mean obeying them in everything. Of course, we have to be careful - that doesn't suddenly mean you can justify your every disobedient action! But v.4 does provide supporting context. It's not just that parents are not to exasperate their children, but that they are to do so by instructing their children in the ways of the Lord. And so to honour your parents is to walk in the way of the Lord, in line with the task God has set them, which can sometimes mean not going with their every whim! (The mission partner I mentioned earlier also had some interesting exegetical support from Exodus, but I'm not sure I can completely recall it now so don't want to put words in his mouth).

Wow, you're probably thinking I've been so calm and reasoned! Trust me, I'm not. I have been upset with myself that I have gotten argumentative and defensive with my parents so easily and quickly! And I don't want to paint my parents as the veritable bad guys. I have to understand how their worldview and life experiences has impacted them, and I am actually confident that in the long term, they will be supportive. But it's been very disappointing not to feel their support now, though it was expected. And it is quite hard when you're treated like a kid when others treat you like an adult! They seem to think I've been very gung-ho when really, my temperament (and more importantly, the fact that God surely doesn't like impetuous fools) militates against it. Instead, I've been torturing myself with "should I or shouldn't I?"

Well, I was going to write more on some of the more disheartening moments in the past month, but those are nothing to do with parents, so that will have to be for another post. Comments welcome.

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Anyone wants to play secret Santa?

2009-12-02T12:21:00.004Z

Thought I'll indulge a little and post a partial book wishlist - partial, because a complete list will probably be never-ending! :-p I'll also just stick to Christian books on this one. Now, who wants to buy me any of the following, or at least contribute an Amazon gift voucher...

If it's in italics, that means that given the opportunity, I'll be sorely sorely tempted to get it.

A good evangelical NT intro - this is the one I'm eyeing.
Beginning to think that having an NT intro would be useful, and people have been nothing but positive about this one by Kostenberger et al.; at the very least, on par with Carson/Moo.

FAQS, ed. Alison Mitchell
Youth work is definitely a possibility for the future, but I've never really done any reading in this area. This is apparently a very good intro book.

Making sense of the Bible by H.H. Drake Williams III
An intermediate-level book tracing 10 themes (eg. covenant, Holy Spirit) through Scripture.

God the Peacemaker by Graham Cole
Latest in the New Studies in Biblical Theology series, looking at the impact of the cross at both personal and cosmic levels.

The Power of words and the wonder of God, eds. John Piper and Justin Taylor
The theme of the Desiring God 2008 conference in book format

The Trellis and the Vine, Colin Marshall and Tony Payne
Brand new from Matthias Media on the nature of Christian ministry and discipleship-making.

Anything by Tim Keller
I actually don't own a single Keller book. His latest, Counterfeit Gods, is near the top of my wishlist, but any Keller book, I reckon, is worth owning.

Introverts in the Church by Adam McHugh
I've actually been following the development of this book for a while now about a topic I'm very interested in - I've always hoped to write a long post/series of posts about this at some point. I've even entered a draw hoping to win a free copy (results pending), but if I don't get it, I'm sure I'll still buy this one.

Christ's victory over evil, ed. Peter Bolt
To be honest, this book might be too heavyweight for me at the moment, but I reckon this will still prove valuable at some point.

A book that has yet to be written, to my knowledge...
A thoughtful, insightful look into parent-children relationships from an Asian Christian perspective. To be fair, I do know someone who is at the moment working on a project that might explore this.

OK, I'll stop here, already feeling guilty over book envy.

Self-pity and God's pity

2009-11-30T06:22:00.003Z

This one is from Glen Scrivener. Loved it enough to post it in its entirety here.

Self-pity is, for me, like a low-level virus, a background throb, a sapping sickness. It heavies my bones and fizzies my blood.

But the other day I gained instant relief. I was reading Psalm 103 in the King James version. Verse 13 says:

Like as a father pitieth his children, so the LORD pitieth them that fear Him.

Could this be true? Does the LORD Himself pity me? Yes. With fatherly affection and concern. I provoke the heart-felt pity of the living God.

You might think this would confirm my dreadful indulgence. After all, heaven seems to agree with my self-obsession. Actually no. He pities the fool who pities himself. In spite of my wallowing, the LORD’s pity is a great ‘nonetheless.’

A father whose child cries only for attention may still choose to pick up the boy, spin him round and kiss him. He is not caving into the child’s manipulation. Instead He is loving from his own free grace. And the boy is weaned from self by the love of another.

In the same way our Father in heaven reaches down in His Son to self-pitying wretches. And He lifts us up, not to confirm our self-centredness but to replace it. Now that heaven pities me, I simply have no need. What could my own self-preoccupation add to the divine pre-occupation of the LORD, who sets His affections on me?

And so this verse brought a tremendous release. Just as the LORD’s love frees us from self-love, His service frees us from self-service, so His pity frees us from self-pity.

A pastoral question on a beatitude

2009-11-27T09:03:00.006Z

I'm leading a Bible study for teenagers tomorrow on the beatitudes - general intro, and then homing in on the first 2 (v.3-4). And I was wondering if someone can help me out pastorally.

In v.4, we have Jesus saying: "Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." In context, it appears as if this isn't just general grief for a sad or tragic event in one's life, but more specifically, a mourning over sin. (Very briefly, I take this line because the Sermon on the Mount is about kingdom living, and the way of the kingdom is the way of repentance. I haven't consulted any commentaries as I don't have one at hand, but I'm pretty sure the standard ones take this view and back it up). However, mourning over sin specifically doesn't necessarily preclude the former, since we grieve not only over our own sin, but sin in a fallen world, which affects every part of creation: hence the existence of natural evil, tragedies and so on. We mourn at the way sin twists and distorts our lives, both in the personal corruption of each of our own selves, and in the disruption of shalom, how things are not the way they ought to be. We find comfort in the gospel, that we are saved from the penalty of sin, and that one day sin will be completely gone.

I'm mindful that at least one girl in my group lost her dad in a tragic accident a few years back, and so such a verse will no doubt be a balm. I think at least another girl is from a single parent family, and who knows what lurks in the background of others in my group. So I want to be sensitive. But I do want them to see that Jesus is talking about mourning over sin in particular. So, any idea how to approach it? Useful phrases or remarks? Stuff that is simple but not simplistic? Any help much appreciated! I've got another 24 hours to think about it...

If I were a Christian filmmaker/scriptwriter

2009-11-23T12:20:00.007Z

WN asked me today: if I was a Christian filmmaker/scriptwriter, what sort of film would I make? He caught me off-guard and I had to say I didn't know. So here's an attempt at an answer. This isn't new, but it's worth restating.

Firstly, every person and every culture has a Big Story, one in which they both shape and are shaped by. Within this Big Story there might be many sub-plots. However, the movement in each of these stories will include in some form creation-fall-redemption-restoration. Any story will seek an answer, explicitly or implicitly, to the well-known four questions posed by Richard Middleton and Brian Walsh:

1. Who am I? Or what is the nature, task, and purpose of human beings?
2. Where am I? Or What is the nature of the world and universe we live in?
3. What's wrong? Or what is the basic problem or obstacle that keeps me from obtaining fulfillment?
4. What is the remedy? How do I solve this problem or where do I find salvation?

This includes films. It could be said, in fact, that films are one of the primary ways in which people attempt to make sense of their place in the world today. Whether they ponder over a so-called weighty film or simply seek solace in a light-hearted comedy, they are still in some way engaging in the task of sense-making. Every film, in summary, offers a vision of what the world is like, and how the world ought to be.

The Christian filmmaker or scriptwriter is aware that his faith claims to have the True Story. We understand that we are to understand humanity in light of God and of sin, and we know where redemption is to be found. Therefore, "it follows that storytellers in our Christian community carry a major responsibility for keeping us alert to these stories and the way they work." (Eugene Peterson). This is because stories can grab us in ways mere arguments can't, and stories always reveal something about their creators. "We feel the emotions, get caught up in the drama, identify with the characters, see into nooks and crannies of life that we had overlooked, realize there is more to this business of being human tan we had yet explored. If the storyteller is good, doors and windows open." (Peterson) So if I were a Christian film-maker or scriptwriter, then I must offer a vision of how the world is like, and how it ought to be, in line with a Christian worldview.

But how I go about that is up to me and my (imagined!) creativity! The possibilities are vast. Think of some recent films. The Dark Knight, for example, might seem to be the antithesis of what a Christian film-maker should offer, but one of the things the film does so effectively is offer a very chilling vision, via the Joker, of what a world ruled by chance and randomness rather than God would look like. This is not to claim that the Dark Knight is a "Christian" movie. Nonetheless, it is extremely effective at jolting us out of our complacency and opening our eyes to the hideousness of a fallen world. Any script that can do that is worth exploring, although I would never allow it to fall into a hopeless cesspool of despair. If in Genesis 3, God himself already offers hints of hope (v.15), then surely we should do the same.

But a Christian filmmaker doesn't have to be so "arty". I think one sort of film I might like to make is a romantic comedy which doesn't envision the partner as the saviour who "makes me whole". That would be incredibly counter-cultural. If it's done well, I think that would have a bigger impact than some "weighty" film. What the viewer of such a film will encounter is the truth that even Mr. or Mrs. Right can't function as your redeemer. What would be great too is a film that celebrates marriage, as most recently Fireproof does, given the dominant image of marriage in films to be dowdy and "a trap". [Spoiler alert] I can't remember much of the film Forces of Nature, but I do remember the ending, where the main character chooses to go back to his marriage partner instead of making off with his fling. That came as a genuine shock. I don't remember the rest of the film being very good, but if it had been better executed, then I can imagine that ending carrying a real poignancy and weight about it. [end spoiler alert]

Does a Christian filmmaker need to make an explicitly "Christian" film, i.e one in which the gospel is proclaimed? Well, they could. I would love to see a film with actual characters with an evangelical faith, not cardboard stereotypes, and if I were a good film-maker, I would love to explore such a character. But I don't think a Christian film-maker necessarily needs to do so. A film should rest on the foundational biblical storyline, and perhaps show the weaknesses of an alternative storyline, but it doesn't always have to be about the climax of that storyline (the gospel event). We could show the beauty in the everyday, in the nature of true friendship, for example. I'm thinking of something like The Station Agent. Or the nature of true sacrifice in some epic. And so on.

I suppose there's plenty more to be said, but hopefully that provides the beginnings of an answer!

You can also browse some of my previous posts on films

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Wordsmiths: Psalm 25

2009-11-21T04:40:00.002Z

ESV

Of David.

25:1 To you, O Lord, I lift up my soul.
2 O my God, in you I trust;
let me not be put to shame;
let not my enemies exult over me.
3 Indeed, none who wait for you shall be put to shame;
they shall be ashamed who are wantonly treacherous.

4 Make me to know your ways, O Lord;
teach me your paths.
5 Lead me in your truth and teach me,
for you are the God of my salvation;
for you I wait all the day long.

6 Remember your mercy, O Lord, and your steadfast love,
for they have been from of old.
7 Remember not the sins of my youth or my transgressions;
according to your steadfast love remember me,
for the sake of your goodness, O Lord!

8 Good and upright is the Lord;
therefore he instructs sinners in the way.
9 He leads the humble in what is right,
and teaches the humble his way.
10 All the paths of the Lord are steadfast love and faithfulness,
for those who keep his covenant and his testimonies.

11 For your name's sake, O Lord,
pardon my guilt, for it is great.
12 Who is the man who fears the Lord?
Him will he instruct in the way that he should choose.
13 His soul shall abide in well-being,
and his offspring shall inherit the land.
14 The friendship of the Lord is for those who fear him,
and he makes known to them his covenant.
15 My eyes are ever toward the Lord,
for he will pluck my feet out of the net.

16 Turn to me and be gracious to me,
for I am lonely and afflicted.
17 The troubles of my heart are enlarged;
bring me out of my distresses.
18 Consider my affliction and my trouble,
and forgive all my sins.

19 Consider how many are my foes,
and with what violent hatred they hate me.
20 Oh, guard my soul, and deliver me!
Let me not be put to shame, for I take refuge in you.
21 May integrity and uprightness preserve me,
for I wait for you.

22 Redeem Israel, O God,
out of all his troubles.

→ Good reflections here.

Observations on being home

2009-11-18T11:59:00.013Z

If you haven't figured it out yet, I am still in Malaysia, and have been for the last 6 weeks or so. The process of resolving whether I can get a new visa is still frustratingly slow. It's certainly nice to be back home, but once you've started getting used to having your favourite foods available again, being in limbo does wear on you. People have been very nice and have tried to be encouraging; more than one person has said to me: "You've been working too hard, so you should enjoy the holiday!" There's also no doubt that God has brought me back for good reasons, some of which I can guess at, others I might not know. But I am raring to head back. Anyway, here's a bunch of stuff I've been picking up.

Reverse culture shock #1. After being in an egalitarian society where 70 year olds expect me to call them Mike, not Mr. Jones, and to discuss things on a peer-to-peer level, I'm finding myself a little confused about what is and what isn't appropriate to talk about with those older than me. I think it doesn't help that there're degrees of differentiation too! My family would be a bit more traditional and there's more of a hierarchical mindset, whereas my church is relatively speaking, much more relaxed. I suspect I'm erring excessively on the polite side.

Reverse culture shock #2. So when an uncle (in Malaysia, anyone who is reasonably older than you is often addressed as such, not just family. No responsibility is taken if you misjudge somebody's age!) offered me coffee, I said immediately: "Yes, please!" After watching his body language thereafter, I realised then that I should have played the "No No" game, making some tentative refusals before accepting his offer. Ergh.

Reverse culture shock #3. Most of the literature dealing with this subject note that symptoms often include

Difficulties explaining coherently your time and experiences abroad. Those who listen don't have the frame of reference or travel background to understand.

Reverse 'home' sickness. Feelings of being lost and lonely.

The relationships at home have changed. The returnees as well as those who stayed at home have altered.
I think I've experienced bits of this, and it's reminded me that when I finally come back home long-term, whenever that might be, I would have to deal with this.

Theory and praxis. I think it was the veteran missionary Martin Goldsmith, who used to pastor a church in Malaysia, who said: "Asian (or was it Malaysian?) Christians are short on theology, long on ethics." By that he meant that Asians tend to dislike theoretical musings for its own sake, but want to see its connection to daily life, the "real world" if you like. Otherwise it would just be dismissed as irrelevant. This has positives and negatives. Positively, it immediately lends Christian reflection a pastoral and missional orientation. Theory and practice must not be separated. Negatively, this often leads to pragmatism, whatever works. They just want to know "what to do", and to think too deeply is "unspiritual". I bring this up because I am sensing this a little.

Bible study. I was also thinking about how our Bible studies work. In Asian Bible studies, it is common for people to immediately think about their own experiences and contexts and to share them as they go through a passage. I was previously very critical of this, and I think there is good reason to be. There's always the danger of reading our own experiences into the text and seeing things which aren't actually there. Tangents also often lead the group to chasing red herrings and completely missing the main point.

But I now think I've allowed myself to be over-critical. Rightly done, I see that there is a lot of value in just naturally intertwining our understanding on the passage with reflections on our lives. I've been observing my home fellowship group and though we don't always get it right (and to be fair, who does?), I thought that for the most part, whenever somebody shares or offers a reflection, it's been tied to the text and not just some random whimsy to offer a thought for the day. It's just their way in which they allow the Bible to bear on our lives. In fact, it's challenged me because I probably don't let God's word really peer as deep into my soul as it should. I suppose the cultural anthropologists might argue that this is because "Western" thinking is more linear and "Eastern" thinking is more circular. So while the principles remain the same: we need to know what the Bible says and means before we can apply it to our lives, there is a variety of models, and I know I can't lead a Bible study here exactly the same way as I would in the UK.

Social networking. Media commentators have picked up on this (eg: here, here, and here), but seeing it for myself was quite different. I was quite stunned by the virtual connectedness of the teenagers in my youth group. The amount of photos taken and placed on Facebook was quite something. Again, social commentators have noticed that we are once more heading into a world where the boundaries between the public and private spheres are blurred, as it was in a pre-industrialised age. But it's still jarring to see photos of myself that I didn't even know were being taken suddenly appear on the Net!

Spiritual warfare. I wasn't home for that long before I heard of a case of demon possession. Growing up, of course, it's not that rare to hear such stories, but it reminded me once again that it's certainly one area to think about for anyone wanting to do ministry in Malaysia. What you don't want is to capitulate to the latest faddish teaching on the one hand or to ignore the spiritual realm on the other.

Wrestling in prayer. I think I identify a little more with the psalmist now. "Lord, please help me to trust you. I know you are sovereign over all, I know that you are good, and that your plans are best, so whatever the outcome is, help me to accept it. [clenches teeth] Lord, help me not to be so half-hearted in what I just said. It's going to be hard if you don't allow me to go back, but help me to grow in my trust. But God, I do believe you are a generous Father, and that Christianity ain't fatalism. My prayers do count for something, don't they? So do the prayers of others? So I pray you'd allow me to head back - I don't see how that's a bad thing. [Pause] I mean, Lord, I'm not actually presuming to tell you what's best for me, oh no, not at all. But it's a fair request? [Pause] Ummm, but I know you're more concerned about me being more like Jesus, more concerned about being more like what you've made me to be than where I am. Consider it all joy and all that. So ummm, help me trust you again no matter what. [Deep breath] But...pretty please?" It's ping-pong prayer, back and forth, back and forth.

Sin. You'd like to think that you've grown stronger, and then you come into a stressful situation and learn that your sinful patterns are more entrenched than you realise. Thank God for his grace.

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How to worship

2009-11-11T12:07:00.000Z

Assimilation and identity

2009-11-10T12:07:00.005Z

The late missiologist Paul Hiebert, together with Young Hertig, has an interesting though dated (1993) article on Asian immigrants in urban cities, with particular reference to North America. They examine the issue of identity and assimilation, suggesting that the core question is: to which culture does the immigrant really belong? Each generation after immigration approaches and answers this in a different way.

1. First generation - clear sense of identity. That is, their identity is very much tied to their "home" culture. They might develop survival skills to cope in the new culture, but their values, beliefs, things & events they find significant etc., are those of "home". If women come from patriarchal cultures, they are unlikely to be exposed much to the new culture, from staying at home etc., and so are often isolated.

2. 2nd generation - deep identity crisis. They encounter schizophrenia, for at home and within the family, they absorb certain values and beliefs, but in school and public are enculturated into the new culture. So you have a clash, with this generation often having to make decisions about how much to take on board parental values, resulting either in withdrawal, rebellion, or more likely, compartmentalization. The best case scenario is if one is able to integrate the best of both worlds. Add in other factors such as the different paces at which siblings within a family might assimilate and it gets even more complicated. One critical factor in the assimilation of second generation young people is the attitude of their parents. Other factors like social mobility etc. all count for something too.

3. 3rd and 4th generation - assimilation and appreciation. Here the identity crisis is not so acute, because they have figured out their place in society more, whether by carving out a niche for themselves or completely assimilating. But when we get to 4th/5th generation, we find that some begin to seek their roots once more, especially if their racial features are more distinct. Here we may find the problem of "hidden immigrants" - eg. looking Chinese on the outside but born and bred in America, and so actually being completely different culturally.

Also, at a deeper level, language becomes an issue. Hiebert and Hertig quote Cheryl, a Korean teenager in LA: "I try to speak Korean when I talk with my mother, but the most important emotional stuff I say in English because I cannot express it in Korean. So my mother does not have any idea what I am trying to say. It is really frustrating. I don't understand why she does not try to learn English. She has lived here almost twenty years." I think a few of us Malaysians will share similar experiences.

So why am I blogging about all this? There's the personal side, of course: I have often wrestled with questions such as this partly due to my upbringing, my family and educational background, the friends that I have, and of course, as someone involved in ministry with international students in a Western country. And because I just wanted to see if I could stimulate some thoughts from my readers, and the article above provides some important intercultural, and indeed, intergenerational insights which are relevant for the Malaysian context, although obviously we are very different in many ways. I think, for example, of the differences between English and Chinese-educated Chinese and the questions of trying to "preserve" a culture versus the "interaction" of cultures. Or the often frustrating family dynamics that those of us who are younger struggle to decipher - why are parents always so obtuse? (Apologies for the examples being obviously Chinese, that's my makeup). Or the wider politics of race and racial discourse - would you describe yourself as Malaysian or Malay/Indian/Chinese/Bumiputra/Iban/Kadazan/Martian first? I actually assert my "Malaysianness" more, I think, but I know others will differ from me.

Some might take exception to using an article on the "immigrant experience" to draw parallels to the Malaysian situation, since "immigrant" itself is a contested term in Malaysia. A big number of us will resent being labelled as pendatang, as if we were 2nd class citizens. That, of course, is to miss the point. It's simply a historical fact that many of us will have ancestors who at some point immigrated to what we now call Malaysia. I know we live in a plural society, so I wonder if we're not so much assimilating into a clearly marked majority/mainstream culture as forging a distinctively "Malaysian" culture, although again what that is is up for debate. How do you compare Sino-Kadazans in Sabah with the Nyonyas in Malacca? But maybe again the lack of flattening is a good thing. It means we're more aware that we all have particular categories and assumptions that affect how we view the world.

Plus, these are questions, I am convinced, we need to reflect on as Malaysian Christians, especially as it impacts on things like pastoral practice, evangelism and so on. It also challenges us to consider afresh what it means to consider ourselves to be Christians first and foremost, to be sojourners in this age. As Tim Kellers notes:

"Identity is a complex set of layers, for we are many things. Our occupation, ethnic identity, etc., are part of who we are. But we assign different values to these components and thus Christian maturing is a process in which the most fundamental layer of our identity becomes our self-understanding as a new creature in Christ along with all our privileges in him."

OK, I've rambled with no clear direction for long enough. Comments welcome. For more on the migrant experience, I can think of no better teacher than the short stories of Jhumpa Lahiri. For an intro to cross-cultural issues, try Sarah Lanier's From Foreign to Familiar or some of Duane Elmer's books.

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Litany of complaints

2009-11-08T13:44:00.005Z

I was at a dinner tonight, and as is fairly common at such occasions, conversation soon turned towards the injustice located in the structures of Malaysian society. There was the litany of complaints directed at our education system, corrupt bureaucracy and so on.

I've been thinking about why I usually feel a little uncomfortable whenever the floodgates open. OK, so part of it is probably that by nature, I'm not a happy bunny when it comes to conflict. I like the still waters, not the grand rapids, thank you very much. Maybe I'm guilty of apathy. But I do believe that to pretend that all is well, to be tidak apa about the wrongs that the innocent suffer, the way that so many crooks seem to get away with their abuse of power, is wrong, plain and simple. It's also probably fair to say that in context, the 2008 political tsunami notwithstanding, such talk arises perhaps because there is a feeling that we need to be woken up from our general malaise. We can't maintain the status quo forever. So such conversations are full of heat and light.

And yet. Here are a few reasons why I feel unsettled whenever such talk occurs among Christians (btw, this isn't necessarily true of tonight's conversations; they simply sparked the thought):

1. These conversations sometimes have the whiff of self-righteousness around them. Look at how rubbish everything else is. It's as if the taint of sin has affected everything and everyone apart from the one pontificating away. We feel justified by the way we remain above the fray. The purity of our motives. Surely there must be a humbler way to express our anger and sadness at the way the current system is broken.

2. These conversations are often tinged with cynicism. Things will always be this way. It's better to send our children away. I'm like, whatever happened to God bringing all things in heaven and earth under Christ? Whatever happened to God putting the world to rights? Maybe again, by nature, I'm an idealist, a romantic, a head-in-the-clouds kind of guy, but it seems to me that Christians have the gospel - good news - the good news that shouts "Jesus is the crucified King!" and calls on us to turn from sin to the living God. And that should shape our responses to injustice.

3. These conversations lose sight of God. My immediate point above suggests that sometimes we act more like fatalists than theists. We forget God is on the throne. He does care about what goes on in his world, not just churchy things. He can effect change, and he loves to use his people to do it. And although contemporary Christianity sometimes shun the image of God as judge, it's actually good news, because it reveals our God is just; the bad guys aren't gonna get away with it. But our God is a merciful God as well. And this is great news, because to our horror, we discover that actually, we are more like those we condemn than we care to admit. We too are in need of mercy, and in view of God's mercy, we offer our bodies as living sacrifices, not the other way around.

O Lord, the next time we are tempted to recite from the Book of Common Complaints, help us to remember instead the Lord's Prayer. For there we find nourishment in remembering who our Father is, strength as we ask for his kingdom to come, and humility as we acknowledge our need for forgiveness. Then maybe we can go out into the world and shine like stars in the universe, as we hold out the word of life.

excerpts

2009-11-06T14:32:00.004Z

[Warning: potentially explosive]

"...And so the light of candle three
Today, is meant to help us see,
That waiting is a holy work
Of faith in God. Nor does there lurk
Beneath the timing of his ways
Some secret malice that displays
Itself in holding back the flow
Of future grace. God does not go
From here to there by shortest routes;
He makes a place for faith and doubts.
Nor does he hasten on his way,
But comes when it is best, today,
Or maybe twenty years from now,
Or more."
- John Piper

The Law is for the proud and the Gospel is for the brokenhearted.
- Martin Luther

Lord cut, Lord carve, Lord wound, Lord do anything that may perfect Thy Father's image in us...
- Samuel Rutherford, from a letter written in 1638

Reaching the next generation

2009-11-03T12:04:00.003Z

I was going to flag this up, but forgot. Better late than never. It's Kevin DeYoung's excellent series of posts on reaching the next generation. Worth reading in its entirety.

1. Grab them with passion.
2. Win them with love.
3. Hold them with holiness.
4. Challenge them with truth.
5. Amaze them with God.

As Kevin says in his introduction, the secret is that there is no secret. Love God, love people, as Jesus so succintly put it. Uncomplicated but uncompromising. To steal a line from Gregory the Great, such a strategy is shallow enough for a lamb to wade in but deep enough for an elephant to swim.

On making your preaching debut in your home church

2009-11-01T05:39:00.004Z

So I've just read this a few minutes ago... (HT: JT)

Your first few sermons are always terrible, no matter who you are.

If you think your first few sermons are great, you’re probably self-deceived. If the folks in your home church think your first few sermons are great, it’s probably because they love you and they’re proud of you. If it’s a good, supportive church there’s as much objectivity there as a grandparent evaluating the “I Love You Grandma” artwork handed to them by the five year-old in their family...

So what?

The great thing about Christian ministry is that Jesus doesn’t start all over again with his church every generation. He gives older men in ministry who shape, disciple, and direct younger men in ministry. This includes (although it’s not limited to) critiquing your sermons...

...Your bad sermon says nothing about your future. If you’ve got folks in your life saying, “Hey, that was a really bad sermon,” that does indicate something about your future, so praise God for it. It’s probaby a sign that God has something for you to say, for the rest of your life.

:D Absolutely right. Well, no one told me it was bad this morning. Although I'm very glad no one said outright: "That was a good talk." That's one of the worse things to hear, because you're never quite sure what the definition of "good" is. Are you just being polite? Did you like the sound of my voice? (Doubtful). I remember the first evangelistic talk I gave and a non-Christian came up afterwards to thank me for a "good" talk. I winced internally, because to me it was clear the challenge of Jesus' claims had completely passed him by. It's more gratifying when someone says, as happened this morning: "That's the word we all needed to hear." And even more specific adjectives, like "clear", are preferable, I think.

I suppose the one disappointing, though not entirely surprising, thing for me is that my parents, who heard me speak for the first time today, just didn't really quite know what to make of it; both the point of the talk, and the fact that it was their son who was giving it. They discussed some of the other items which were shared this morning, but they pointedly avoided any discussion of mine. One rule I sometimes use in writing talks is: would my mum get the main point? And maybe I failed.

The other thing that's really difficult, of course, is for the preacher to consciously point away from oneself. The lines from Kate Wilkinson's hymn is one I will constantly need to repeat to myself: "And may they forget the channel / Seeing only him".

Speaking this Sunday

2009-10-30T15:16:00.002Z

I'm going to be speaking for the first time at the main service this Sunday for my home church. Probably close to 15 minutes (I got allocated 10 but I just know I'm going to overshoot, although I'll try my best to keep it short)! I'll also be briefly interviewed beforehand. I'll be speaking from Ephesians 4:7-16, and my brief is to encourage people to think through "ministry".

I am going to be soooo nervous - do pray for me! A prophet is never welcome in his home country blah blah blah...just kidding...

Disdain disdain

2009-10-26T15:59:00.003Z

disdain. to look upon or treat with contempt; despise; scorn

In the book Workers for the Harvest Field, David Jackman recounts an interview with a ministry candidate. This person had been going on and on about how much he loved to teach the Bible when Jackman's colleague interrupted him: "Yes, but do you the people you'll teach it to?"

I've often thought about this question - do I love people, especially those whom I encounter as someone in "ministry"? If in my eyes, people simply become projects to moan and fret over, then I might as well quit. Any ministry of the Word that I do, excepting God's grace to work through jars of clay, might as well be a yodelling performance for all they care. That's what John Wesley apparently told one of his proteges: "Your temper is uneven; you lack love for your neighbours. You grow angry too easily; your tongue is too sharp - thus, the people will not hear you".

I have struggled with this. I think of the person I've been reading the Bible one-to-one with this year. I think there are times when, after going through the same thing for the umpteenth time, I have thought to myself: 'Why don't you just get it (and become a 'better Christian'?...and show what a brilliant discipler I am...and on it goes)". I think of a recent cell group Bible study I was in - if you think it's you I'm talking about, it isn't :) - and how frustrating it was. It was so easy to heap scorn onto them, to flash my inductive Bible study credentials, spit out a tonnage of verbiage and leave the room with gold dust on the floor and stars in their eyes. But these are Christians, people who are trying to follow Jesus in their imperfect ways, people who carry baggage around with them, in other words, people like me. I think too of how easy it is to disdain those who seem to have so reductionistic, so shallow an understanding of the gospel. Can't they see it's about the kingdom of God? Why aren't they at the forefront of political activism? Or why are they always taking verses out of context? Or why are they always protesting against Harry and his Da Vinci Materials?

But when I look at the Bible, I see something different. God in the Old Testament is portrayed as a warrior, and the Exodus can be seen as a great victory of a great king. Yet in Psalm 78 God is described as leading his people like sheep through the desert. In Hosea, I see God despairing of his hard-hearted people, but telling them, how can I give you up? I look at Jesus, looking over the crowd, and having great compassion on them because they were lost. I look at the way he treats the rich young man, with that beautiful line: "Jesus looked at him and loved him" (Mark 10:21). He is the good shepherd who lays down his life for the sheep. To be sure, we see Jesus getting exasperated with his disciples and even more antsy with the Pharisees. And I don't think I'm saying that there is no place for criticism or even a bit of a kick up the you know where. That evangelicalism is in need of a shot in the arm is not in question. It's just not the point of this post.

I'm part of a messy community. A community that's slow to learn. That includes myself. I long to see it become more conformed to how God wants it to be, but sometimes it seems as if we're heading the opposite direction! But God says his Word does not return to him empty (Isaiah 55:10); it is effective. And so I am committed to a ministry of the Word, however it might look like, from formal teaching to informal encouraging, allowing the gospel to be applied specifically to our lives. That means there are battles to be fought, because such a commitment is not going to be unopposed, not least by the devil. But when I become self-righteous, when I start looking at disdain at others, that's when I've forgotten the gospel of Jesus myself. When I become impatient, I've forgotten how patient God has been with me in calling me to himself.

I don't want that to happen. Oh Lord, how we need to know your grace again!

Wordsmiths: Dream Song 14

2009-10-21T13:06:00.001Z

Dream Song 14

Life, friends, is boring. We must not say so.
After all, the sky flashes, the great sea yearns,
we ourselves flash and yearn,
and moreover my mother told me as a boy
(repeatingly) "Ever to confess you're bored
means you have no

Inner Resources." I conclude now I have no
inner resources, because I am heavy bored.
Peoples bore me,
literature bores me, especially great literature,
Henry bores me, with his plights & gripes
as bad as Achilles,

who loves people and valiant art, which bores me.
And the tranquil hills, & gin, look like a drag
and somehow a dog
has taken itself & its tail considerably away
into the mountains or sea or sky, leaving
behind: me, wag.

John Berryman

The Word in the week

2009-10-19T12:40:00.009Z

James 1:13-27 is a mirror. Well, actually, it isn't just James; all of Scripture is a mirror, according to verse 23. It reflects reality, life as it really is. I was looking at this passage recently, and was thoroughly surprised by it - there are things that doesn't quite say what I thought it said, but for now, I just want to concentrate on verse 18.

"[God] chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created."

God is the subject. And he's good. Trustworthy. Generous. James make sure that our picture of God is right in the preceding verse. This is our God. What has he done? He has given us new life! He's taken the initiative. We had nothing to do with it. How so? Through his word, which is implanted in us, which can save us, according to verse 21. It is again, something he has graciously gifted us with. And to what purpose? That we might have the blessing of growing and persevering as Christians, becoming more like Jesus, and so give our Creator the glory.

I guess the main reason I mention this passage is that in one sense, it sums up last week for me.

1. On Tuesday evening, I went out with a good friend I haven't seen in several years. It was great to laugh and reminiscince. But the best part was getting to talk about Jesus and Christianity for 90+ minutes or so. My friend has shown interest in so-called spiritual things before, and God was kind enough to, through a friendship that has endured all these years, let me win his respect enough to gain a hearing. I briefly talked him through the big turning points of the Christian story: creation, fall, redemption. We chatted about how God was the Big Boss, the one who is in charge of the universe. We saw how sin wasn't merely bad behaviour, but how the heart of it was a wilful desire to place ourselves as God, which in turn estranges us from Him. I confess to stumbling a bit when getting to Jesus (the one place you don't want to stumble!), but again, God was gracious and I went to one of my favourite passages in this situation, that of Jesus and the rich young man. I did wish I had spent more time talking about justification, especially as one of his questions concerned that point.

We also talked about relativism and how on closer inspection it doesn't hold up. He was very honest and said that although he was a relativist, he can see how that wasn't very solid ground to stand on. He was also very honest in his own assessment: if the essence of sin was as described above, than he was worshipping himself, and well, he didn't really want to give that up yet. I listened too as he told me a little about Buddhism - he comes from a Buddhist background - but how he was finding that enslaving. Towards the end of the evening, he said something along the lines of how he was trying to find and please God, whoever he was, and hope for the best, and I felt led at that point simply to turn to Acts 17:22ff. Having gotten his permission, I simply read out Paul's sermon to the Greeks. It was amazing how relevant it felt at that moment. I didn't have to fumble for an answer, the Bible was doing the talking for me!

We parted, having consumed copious amounts of fluids, with him saying that he would definitely look more into Christianity. I've suggested a few titles for him to read, apart from looking into a gospel itself, and pray that God would be working new birth in him.

2. On Friday evening and most of Saturday, I went along to the Kuching Bible Conference, which I only knew existed last week! It's a conference seeking to encourage expository preaching by modelling it, similar to the aims of its Klang Valley counterpart. This excited me greatly. Expository preaching sometimes does have a bad name, partly because people have seen it poorly modelled and assume that it's simply another synonym for lecturing. Which of course, it isn't! Apparently Christopher Ash spoke last year, and he would be as good a model as any. This year we had John Carter, an elder from a church in Leeds with vast experience. He certainly worked us hard through the letter of Galatians! If I had one criticism, it was that he was good on the detail but not so good on the flow of thought, so that it was hard to see what the big picture of Galatians was. But ignore this armchair critic - it's good to see this initiative in my hometown, and especially good to see some of the movers behind this conference was definitely not whom you normally expect to be behind this sort of thing! Because how does God work? He works through the "word of truth".

3. The real highlight of the week for me, though, was Saturday evening, as you can tell from my previous post. Going to the youth group brought back fond memories for me. But without a doubt, although I was nervous going in, the happiest bits were spending some time with the Form 4s (that's 16 year olds) and hopefully allowing one Bible study to become a fond memory for them. To be able to laugh, discuss the pertinent questions of identity, and to actually get them looking in the Bible and be able to see that God's word does speak into their lives (and mine). My mum looked at some of the material I prepared and cautioned me about pitching it too high. So I had a look at it again, but I thought: no, one or two of the questions are hard and they'll need some guidance, but that's ok. They can get this. And they did!

Now that more time has elapsed since Saturday evening, I can now think of lots more things I wished I've done better. But God's word, as we looked at it, was working in us, so that "we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created." That's all you could ask for. They probably won't remember the specific study years, months, maybe even weeks, from now. But maybe the Holy Spirit will help them remember that God is gracious. Good. Trustworthy. And generous. And they'll thank Jesus.

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So you think you can handle it, eh?

2009-10-16T14:47:00.005Z

I've lead Bible studies with PhD students, and I've read one-to-one with a managing director of a company, and I've told Bible stories to under-5s*...

So tell me, why am I utterly terrified to be leading a Bible study for teenagers tomorrow evening?

Maybe because God will decide tomorrow that BK could do with a huge helping of humility...

To be fair, I am excited too!

*If you thought PhD students asked hard questions, I'm sorry, you got it backwards...

UPDATE Saturday 17/10: Well I had a real blast! My group were a little quiet and shy understandably but we were definitely looking into the Word and having loads of fun by the end of it. I liked them, and for my sake, they pretended they liked me. :) Especially gratifying to hear them articulate the main points of the study and especially what Jesus had done when our youth co-ordinator got every group to review what they've learnt at the end. Alongside reindeers, murdering basketball players, and "The Shirt"....

How I know I'm not in the new creation yet

2009-10-16T14:43:00.002Z

Nyamuk Nyamuk Nyamuk
Musuh kita semua*

*"Mosquitoes our common enemy", from a government jingle from ages ago promoting a campaign to eradicate places for mosquito breeding.

Making sense of Matthew 17

2009-10-14T05:37:00.006Z

I read Matthew 17 for my quiet time today, and I'm trying to figure it out. Maybe I'm dense, but I'm not sure I get it! So am using this blog to untangle some thoughts. You probably need the passage open in front of you somewhere to follow me.

What we have here is the transfiguration account, the healing of a demonised boy, and an incident peculiar to Matthew's gospel on paying the temple tax. I don't recall ever reading about the temple tax before. In the wider context, Simon Peter has just confessed that Jesus is the Christ in 16:16. Jesus now begins to stress how he must go to Jerusalem and be killed, and that he would be raised to life. We see this in 16:21, repeated in 17:9, 12b, 22-23 and later on in 20:18-19. This isn't exactly what Peter wanted to hear! But Jesus rebukes him, and teaches that he is to be the suffering Christ. To follow him is to take up your own cross. This is the path for his disciples. But this isn't the end of the story, as 16:27-28 indicate. Jesus will reign gloriously when he resurrects. V.28 seems to point towards the immediate aftermath of his resurrection, while v.27 appears to look further along towards the second coming. Cross before resurrection, suffering before glory. That's the pattern Jesus is teaching, both for his own ministry and that of his disciples.

v.1-13
This teaching of Jesus, therefore, seems to be re-affirmed by the transfiguration episode. We heard that Jesus will come in glory, here we see Jesus appearing in glory! Jesus is reaffirmed by God the Father in v.5, with the same words as when he was baptised. This time there is also an addition: "Listen to him!" Listen to what he's just been teaching about suffering and glory!

The disciples are just as confused as ever though. In Mark's account, he records how they discuss what "raised from the dead" mean. Their thought processes go something like this:
ok, we're waiting for the Messiah,
who will put the world to rights again
(this is when resurrection happens, right?)
but Elijah's meant to come first to prepare the way.
Wait a minute, where's Elijah?

But Jesus corrects their understanding. Elijah's here already! He's John the Baptist (v.13). So that means the Messiah is here! But this Messiah isn't what you expect - he "is going to suffer at their hands". Actually, that's what happened to John the Baptist (v.12). Suffering before glory, again.

v.14-23
Then we get the story about the exorcism of the boy. Disciples failed, Jesus didn't. I was a bit puzzled by this account. Is this simply a story suggesting that if we have enough faith, we'll have a powerful deliverance ministry? What we have to do is to simply believe? That seems, at first glance, to be a plausible interpretation. But a closer look suggests otherwise. v.22-23 has Jesus teaching about his impending death and resurrection again, which he obviously thinks is important. That doesn't sit well with simply interpreting this story as Jesus giving a model example of how to cast out demons.

Rather, in v.17 it seems better to understand Jesus' rebuke as a continued failure to actually trust in the words of Jesus. Peter's rebuke of Jesus that he could not be killed at the end of chapter 16 is one of many examples. No wonder Jesus is exasperated and possibly resulted in him putting in a quick call to his Father: "Dad, they're not listening! Could you tell them to?" (v.5) Their unbelief was not so much a failure of technique ("maybe we didn't quite have the required deposit of faith to cast out the demon!") but more of a failure to depend on God and trust what Jesus says. That's why Jesus repeats his teaching (v.22-23). So while there is probably something to be gleaned here about deliverance ministry, that's not the main point at all. Certainly it isn't a call to us to look for demons behind every sickness! What Jesus wants to emphasise is a dependence and trust in him. That might result in us actually performing an exorcism if God chooses to, but the authority belongs to him alone.

v.24-27
Errr...this one ah, I'm not surelah. Apparently, Jewish males of a certain age had to pay taxes for the upkeep of the temple. Jesus' point in his exchange with Peter seems to be that the tax is now void. That's because of who Jesus is - he is God's King. (And presumably what he's about to do, go to the cross). But then Jesus chooses to lay down his right and pay the tax, something Paul probably took note of since it will come out in his writings.

Summary
So I guess the big point here is that Jesus is showing that he is the King (Christ) and we should listen to him, trust in Him. But He is the Suffering King, who will go to the cross to die for us. But to follow Him is not a futile exercise, for even though we too have to take up our cross, there is glory in the end. So let us praise God and remain faithful.

What do you think?

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"that through endurance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope"

2009-10-13T03:37:00.005Z

I didn't make it to the Klang Valley Bible Conference, but I did get to listen to Dr. Bryan Chapell's sermon at City Discipleship Presbyterian Church on Romans 15. It was food for the soul, causing me to marvel at our faithful and merciful God once again. Have a listen here.

(HT: The Agora)

The Lausanne Global Conversation

2009-10-11T05:05:00.005Z

New questions are emerging which are different from the older, familiar ones. And the older ones are also taking on new forms. Think, for example, of the issues surrounding the massive rise in people movements over the past 50 years, and of the trends in urbanisation, and of the penetration of other faiths. Christians need to talk, and global issues need global conversations.

The Lausanne Movement is working in partnership with publications around the world in providing the 12 key articles by leading theologians on issues facing the global church. Each article will be published in the same month by everyone, to spark the conversation globally. These articles each have four commissioned respondents from different parts of the world and will be accompanied online by video and photo essays, and responses from people like you.

The Lord gave gifts to his church to share and, through Lausanne, the Africans can share their joy and perseverance, the Indians their wisdom on living in a pluralistic context, the Persecuted Church their precious trust of what it means to share in Christ’s suffering, the converts from other faiths their insights into ways of reaching those whose faith they once shared, the West its scholarship (which we should remember was once found in North Africa), and so on around the world. In ways unimagined, we can share these gifts even across different languages, through automatic translation tools. Those translation tools are not perfect, but, with a commitment of all to the authority of Scripture and a willingness to listen and learn, we will manage to understand one another. The work you put into the global conversation will be richly rewarded.

The Lausanne Global Conversation will include:

a series of 12 articles appearing in Christianity Today (and in dozens of publications around the world), plus parallel articles in the Canadian media and elsewhere

thought-provoking blogs, podcasts, radio programs and video discussion forums

interaction on Twitter and Facebook

advance written and multimedia presentations from CT2010 speakers

connections to related discussions on the web already underway

in-person interaction at Bible colleges, mission agencies, churches and theological institutions through the Cape Town GlobaLink

Here is the very first article to kick off the whole conversation:
Whole Gospel, Whole Church, Whole World
by Christopher Wright

The Lausanne Covenant - substantially crafted by John Stott, includes the phrase: ‘evangelization requires the whole church to take the whole gospel to the whole world’.(1)

One might argue that the three wholes embodied in this ringing phrase are hardly new, and go back to the Apostle Paul, if not to the patriarch Abraham himself. Let us look at what each means.

The whole Church means all believers. The whole world means every man and woman. The whole gospel means all the blessings of the gospel. That is surely better than some missionaries taking some blessings of the gospel to some people in some parts of the world. But the three wholes also have more substantial, qualitative implications worthy of a Global Conversation.

‘The whole gospel’

The phrase suggests there may be some versions of the gospel that are less than whole - that are partial, deficient, less than fully biblical.

First, we must give full weight to the spiritual realities of sin and evil, and we must evangelistically proclaim the glories of God’s redemptive achievement in the death and resurrection of Jesus. There would be no gospel without the cross. Indeed all blessings of the gospel derive from it, from personal salvation through Christ’s death in our place to the reconciling of all creation. The cross is at the heart of The Lausanne Movement, and the theme around which the Cape Town Congress revolves is ‘God in Christ, reconciling the world to himself’.

The whole gospel must be drawn from the whole Bible. So we also have to ask how the social, economic, and political dimensions of the Old Testament relate to Christian mission. For centuries God revealed his passion against political tyranny, economic exploitation, judicial corruption, the suffering of the poor and oppressed, brutality and bloodshed. The laws God gave and the prophets God sent addressed these very matters more than any other issue except idolatry (they regarded such things as idolatry’s manifestations). Meanwhile the psalmists regularly cried out in songs of social protest and lament that we tend to screen out of our Christian worship.

Unfortunately one can still detect a subtle sense that somewhere between Malachi and Matthew, all that changed. As if such things no longer spark God’s anger. This makes the alleged God of the New Testament unrecognisable as the LORD God, the Holy One of Israel. He has shed the priorities of the Mosaic Law, and the burden for justice that he laid on his prophets, at such cost to them.

I find such a view of God and of mission to be unbiblical and unbelievable, if thewhole Bible is the trustworthy revelation of the identity, character and mission of the living God.

The great Christ-centred, cross-centred redemptive truths do not nullify - rather, they complete - all that the Old Testament revealed about God’s commitment to the wholeness of human life, and redeeming his whole creation, for God’s own glory in Christ.

As gospel people we must believe, live and communicate all that makes the gospel the staggeringly comprehensive good news that it is. I hope The Global Conversation will show multiple examples of this in action.

The whole church

In a quantitative sense, the expression ‘the whole church’ insists that mission is the task of all Christians, not just of the clergy or missionaries. The Lausanne Covenant talks of our being ‘called out’ to be ‘sent out’. The whole gospel is fully expressed only when the Church, Christ’s body on earth, faithfully fulfils the three roles Christ himself fulfilled on earth and for which he empowers us through his Spirit. We are called to a priestly role in worship and in prayer; to a prophetic role in declaring God’s message and priorities to his world; and to a servant role. When these are practised together we truly reflect God’s redeeming love for the world. Let’s look at dimensions of wholeness that will need to be included in the conversation.

Missional church.
What other kind of church is there, than the one that God created for mission? As someone said, ‘It’s not that God has a mission for his church in world; but that God has a church for his mission in the world.’

Scandalous lack of wholeness. The church is not just the delivery mechanism of the gospel. It is itself the product of the gospel, and is to be the living, visible, proof of the ethically transforming power of the gospel. The failures and abuses in the worldwide evangelical community are, in the literal New Testament sense of the word, a massive scandal—a stumbling block to the gospel being seen, heard and accepted. For that the only answer is repentance and reformation.

The global Christian community. We need the whole world church to work with much greater levels of mutual cooperation and partnership.. There is a lot of listening to do, a lot of learning and un-learning. Our task across borders and boundaries is to do better, in Paul’s words, at accepting one another, counting others better than ourselves, and looking to their interests more than our own. A Global Conversation is a good place to start, though not to end.

The whole world

We can take the phrase ‘the whole world’ in a purely geographical sense. Nowhere is not the mission field, including our own country. There are still many unreached peoples, many languages that have no Scripture, many places where the name of Christ has never been heard. All these are urgent priorities for evangelistic mission. The ends of the earth are still waiting. And today the ends of the earth may also be our next-door neighbour, or the migrant in our midst. But we need to go deeper and consider other dimensions of our whole world:

The world story. If our Bibles begin at Genesis 3 and end at Revelation 20, we are in danger of missing the whole point of God’s great story of the redemption of all creation. We will think only of saving sinners from the final judgment, not about living in the present creation as those who already bring the transforming values and prophetic truth of the new creation into the here and now.

The world of worldviews, philosophies and faiths. What are the gods that surround us, and what is the Christlike and neighbour-loving response to those who worship them? We must not confine this to thinking only about world faiths. There are whole ideologies of secularism and atheism that need to be engaged, along with the idols of patriotism and hedonism, that are happily thriving on the worship of those who claim to be disciples of Jesus Christ.

The world of creation, and our responsibility to the world which God has reconciled to himself through the cross (Colossians 1:20). If the planet was created by Christ, sustained by Christ and belongs to Christ as his inheritance, the least we can do is to look after it. Biblical stewardship of the earth should have been an evangelical theme long before the threat of climate change turned it into a matter of self-preservation.

The world of globalization, and the public square. What kind of missional engagement should take place in relation to globalized economic trends and forces, massive migration, the cyber-world of the Internet and new technologies, and all that goes on in the marketplace and public square, in business, politics, education, media, journalism, medicine, and the whole world of human work?

The world of violence, war, and terrorism. Apart from addressing the appalling scale of death and destruction that these idols produce, do we not have a responsibility also to challenge and expose their falsehood and to ask what gospel reality is implied by Jesus when he said, ‘Blessed are the peacemakers’?

The world of human need and suffering. If the gospel is good news in relation to all that sin has turned into bad news, then it must be big enough, and our mission wide enough, to include the transforming power of God in relation to disease, hunger, brutality, human trafficking, and all forms of ethnic hatreds and oppression.

I close by returning to the Congress theme verse in its rich and profound context. The Apostle Paul’s words in 2 Corinthians 5 18-19 are a wonderful summary of the theme of this article. “All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ...”

The reconciling, redemptive ministry of Jesus sends out those whom he has called out. And we are sent out to bring the whole gospel of God to the whole of God’s world. None of us can engage in every area. That is why God created the church with a multiplicity of gifts and callings, so that we can, as a whole church bear witness to the whole gospel in the whole world.

I invite you to join the global conversation now at www.lausanne.org. May it generate more intelligent understanding and more focused action, as we work with God in his global mission.

Chris Wright is International Director of the Langham Partnership International, and Chair of the Lausanne Theology Working Group.

(1) For the Lord we Love: Your study guide to The Lausanne Covenant by John Stott is available in The Didasko Files series from Christian bookshops or online retailers. (64pp ISBN 978 1 906890 00 1)

Here are responses from Samuel Escobar, Emily Choge, and Christopher Heuertz

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curveballs

2009-09-26T16:52:00.003Z

Some of my readers would know this by now. Due to the way my visa situation has developed, mostly due to the way the entire immigration system in the UK has been restructured, I'm leaving the UK next week. Hopefully, this is merely temporary, and I would be back in a few weeks time with a fresh visa, but nothing is entirely clear-cut at the moment. In theory, all the paperwork seems fine, but it's hard to be confident in the current climate.

It is quite a worrying and disappointing time for me, of course, to say nothing of the disruption it's causing the international student ministry here. I also have had, and probably will continue to, wrestle with trusting God and his sovereignty and goodness. It also means I'm forced to evaluate how much stock I'm putting into my own plans and whether I am willing to allow God to change them.

Nonetheless, I can already see the positive side of going home at this point in time. It'd be great to actually be back in Malaysia for more than just a week or so and see how it's going, to catch up with people (maybe even some of you?), to have some reflection time, and as my supervisor put it, to see what good works God has prepared for me to do.

Thank you to those who have prayed and continue to pray for me. It is much appreciated.

Are we searching for a better god?

2009-09-17T20:30:00.005Z

One of my friends has just started reading a fascinating book called Searching for a Better God by Wade Bradshaw, who used to be on staff at L'Abri England. He's been waxing lyrical over it, so I borrowed it to read on one of my lunch breaks.

Loads of thought-provoking stuff. Bradshaw starts off by showing that all of our lives are grounded in some form of hope. You could say we all fashion narratives out of our own lives, with a climax or ending we hope to reach, although he won't put it that way. In that sense, we live teleologically. He then argues that (Western) culture has shifted imperceptibly. Whereas previously the main question people ask would be: "Does God exist?", this has now shifted to "Is God good?". That isn't to say people no longer ask the first question, as New Atheism shows. But people reject the gospel not so much because they don't believe in God, but because they no longer believe that the God, as found in the Bible, is morally good. What sort of God would allow, even command, the atrocities found in the Old Testament? What sort of God is so intolerant, of homosexuality, of pluralism? In truth, we humans are morally superior to such a God. God "cannot be a source of hope, not because He isn’t real, but because He would not be good to know and to live with forever."

That's as far as I got. Bradshaw then presumably goes on to wrestle with such new challenges, as the chapter headings for the rest of the book suggest: Is God angry? Is God distant? Is God a bully?

I certainly have lots of time for Bradshaw's argument. This is a generalisation, of course, but those of us in our 20s, it seems, living in a world where any disaster can be communicated to us via twitter, where we are subjected to a 1001 worthy causes (reminding us of the dark side of the world we live in), are tired of living for ourselves. Consumerism has been tried and found wanting. We long for more. We want to find something beyond ourselves. We're looking for a better hope, in other words. And so there is a renewed activism, a passion for social justice. Even in Christian circles, this can be found in expressions as diverse as the resurgence of what is sometimes called "New Calvinism", where the glory of God is emphasised and "man-centered theology" abhorred, and those stressing the cosmic dimensions of God's salvation and downplaying penal substitution. I guess you could also claim this is also seen in the language of the "kingdom" being deployed more commonly if differently, though I wonder if some charismatics (John Wimber was not shy about such terminology!) and Reformed types (we've been reading Vos/Goldsworthy since you were in your nappies, don't lecture me about "kingdom"!) would object.

Interestingly, as a Christian, I think I share similar struggles. The fixed point of God's sovereignty has not, as far as I can tell, posed a huge struggled for me. But the fixed point of God's goodness, that he actually cares for me and the details of my life, is one I struggle with more. Granted, it's not quite the same issue being articulated as that of the non-Christian, but I wonder if they spring from the same DNA.

I think too of one of the (Asian) girls some of us know. She's been coming to Christian things for quite a while now, and she's willing to say Christianity is objectively true. She was even encouraged that one of her mutual friends - getting baptised this Sunday! - actually came to Christ. But for her, she isn't sure if Jesus is worth it. Is this God really that good?

Anyway, happy to hear comments.

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NBA Hall of Fame

2009-09-12T20:12:00.003Z

Every year the NBA Hall of Fame inducts a few people into its hallowed halls. They've just admitted the Class of 2009, and what a class. One person overshadows them all, of course: Michael Jordan. But he's not who I want to talk about. Alongside Jordan is John Stockton, the NBA's all-time assist and steals leader. There have been flashier passers, but Stockton is the type of player who knows where he wants the ball to go to, and that it will go there. I once watched him throw a bounce pass that looked so simple, but was so razor sharp in splitting the defence - it was ten times better than any behind-the-back pass you find on an ESPN highlight reel. Of the other point guards I've actually watched (as opposed to those I didn't, such as the old-timers like Bob Cousy), only Magic Johnson and Jason Kidd are comparable.

And then there's David Robinson. My favourite player as a teenager was Penny Hardaway, but there's no player in the NBA, possibly in all sports, I admire more than the Admiral. David Robinson is class, not just as an athlete, but as a person. I like to think the reason why the San Antonio Spurs has remained such a professional and respected organisation unlike one or two others (see: New York) is due in no small part to his influence. I don't think I got to watch him at his peak - the early 90s, where by most accounts he could justifiably lay claim to being the best centre of all-time, but I did watch him in the late 90s and especially after he gracefully ceded leadership of the Spurs to Tim Duncan. He had no ego. I'm proud he calls himself a Christian, because he has shown complete integrity; no one speaks of him badly. Here's a brief news profile, and a more in-depth one. Here's a tribute post.

Let us Love and Sing and Wonder

2009-09-11T20:38:00.005Z

Weekend's here! Am happy after having had to do 8 days straight. Here's the song that's been stuck in my head for the last few days - John Newton set to new music by Laura Taylor, as featured on the album Indelible Grace III: For All the Saints. It was also covered by Jars of Clay on their Redemption Songs album. Band featured here is an Asian-American Christian group, I believe.

Let us love and sing and wonder
Let us praise the Savior's name
He has hushed the law's loud thunder
He has quenched Mount Sinai's flame

2. Let us love the Lord Who bought us
Pitied us when enemies
Called us by His grace and taught us
Gave us ears and gave us eyes
He has washed us with His blood
He has washed us with His blood
He has washed us with His blood
He presents our souls to God

3. Let us wonder grace and justice
Join and point to mercy's store
When through grace in Christ our trust is
Justice smiles and asks no more
He Who washed us with His blood
He Who washed us with His blood
He Who washed us with His blood
Has secured our way to God

4. Let us praise and join the chorus
Of the saints enthroned on high
Here they trusted Him before us
Now their praises fill the sky
Thou hast washed us with Thy blood
Thou hast washed us with Thy blood
Thou hast washed us with Thy blood
Thou art worthy Lamb of God

Words: John Newton
Music: Laura Taylor

Bible translations for non-literates

2009-09-02T20:55:00.003Z

There's a very interesting article over at the Lausanne World Pulse on advancing Bible translations for non-reading audiences. (HT: etrangere)

This is a great reminder to bookish people like me that print media is not the only form in which the Word of God can be conveyed. While I very rarely meet anyone who's illiterate, I have tried to think through (vaguely) how to teach/lead Bible studies for non-book people. That is, those who might have some ability to read, but struggle with it, or just aren't at all interested in it. This reminded me that while it's good to try to teach Bible reading skills (Observation etc.), they aren't the only tools at my disposal. I remember a Bible study years ago which I restructured as a drama being quite a hit! An oral translation might also be better at bringing out some aspects, such as tone and emphasis, much better than a written translation can.

Of course, anything that seeks to make the Bible accessible to more people is always a good thing!

Myth-busting

2009-09-02T20:22:00.006Z

Unsurprisingly, quite a few introspective "state of the nation" pieces coming out.

There's an outsider's perspective, from a decidedly secularist viewpoint: The myth of a moderate Malaysia, originally published in Forbes. I get the sense that the piece is more about his larger point that religion is best subordinated to modernity, with Malaysia as his prime example, rather than Malaysia itself. But it's an interesting piece nevertheless, since it probably is representative of the beliefs of many of the urban, upper-middle class, Malaysiakini-reading segment.

Another myth to come under attack is that of the monolithic community. This is a piece I'm generally happy to agree with.

I've also gone back to read my post from over a year ago - Race meets the Malaysian church, in conversation with my friend WN, who incidentally is trying to think through what it means to be a citizen at the moment over at his blog. And I don't think there's anything I'll change from that post.

15Malaysia

2009-08-31T00:01:00.002Z

Happy National Day Malaysia!

Old news for those back home, but I have enjoyed the 15 Malaysia project, a collection of short films (about 3-6 minutes each) by some of the nation's leading artists highlighting the joys and frustrations of Malaysia and Malaysians. Pete Teo, one of our singer-songwriters, was apparently one of the prime movers. One video is being released every few days. They include some unexpected figures!

You can also check them out on Youtube.

Travelling through Matthew 2

2009-08-24T18:34:00.006Z

I think it was J.I Packer who counselled Christians in their Bible reading not to spend too long a time away from the gospels, because it is there we see Jesus clearest. So I thought it was time to find my way back there. But which one? I've grown quite familiar with Mark, having studied or taught it for the last few years. And I know bits of John quite well, which is not the same as understanding it! So I thought I'll have a crack at one of the other two, and settled on Matthew, which is surprisingly unfamiliar territory. I know this is the gospel where we get the Sermon on the Mount. And the Great Commission. And of course 9:37-8, one reason why I currently do what I do! But that's about it.

I once wrote a long reflection on Matthew 1:1-25, still one of my favourite pieces. So I might as well pick up where I left off. Not strictly reflections, but some observations on Matthew 2.

2:1-12
One of the big things to come through in Matthew 1 is how the story of Jesus has its roots in the story of Israel. So we get this recounting of Jesus' family tree which takes him right back to David and Abraham. In case we don't get it, 1:20 reminds us again when the angel addresses Joseph, Jesus' earthly dad, as a "son of David". There's a short but stark reminder in the genealogy of the situation of God's people, deported to Babylon because of their sin. But now, in Jesus, salvation has come, the salvation which the prophets promised beforehand.

So, the shift in chapter 2 is actually very striking. We don't go the synagogues, to the leaders of the Jewish community, but to the palace of a pagan king and some strange, foreign men who mysteriously appear from the East. Imagine watching a Malaysian film with a local setting, local characters, and an emphasis on our own history: Hang Tuah, May 13, etc. And with liberal sprinklings of Manglish, an insider language. Then, all of a sudden there's a 2-minute scene set in America with some Mat Salleh* actors, whom you dimly recognise as minor characters on some D-list TV show from ages ago, making a cameo appearance. And then disappear before you know it. Eh?

The analogy is not perfect, but it's a bit like that here. Non-Jews take prominence. No Jewish people in sight really. Herod does gather them (2:3), but it's only the Magi who actually make the journey to see Jesus. And making some great one-liners at Herod's expense: "Hey, King Herod man, where's the king?" I haven't had a chance to look at it in the NIV, but I'm reading it in the ESV and we get a lot about kingship. Jesus born in the days of Herod the king (v.1). Magi asking where's the king? (v.2). The current king troubled - "Yo Magi, can't you see I'm the king?" (v.3) and asking about the chosen king (v.4). A prophecy about a king (v.5-6). The summons of a king (v.7). An expressed but insincere desire to worship the king (v.8) And on and on it goes, until v.12, where the king's command (Herod) is subverted by the warning of the King (God).

v.13-23
One of the things that struck me here was of course, Egypt. Again, now that we've been reminded of Israel's history in chapter 1, any mention of Egypt is sure to recall the Exodus, God delivering his people. The allusion seems to imply that God is doing his work of rescue again, but on a deeper level: rescue from sin. I had a quick look at a commentary to try to chase the Egypt reference a little more. This is a helpful summary: "In Egypt, then, God now kept His Son safe, as he had preserved Israel long ago and out of Egypt he would soon call him to his work of redemption as he had liberated Israel from Egypt to fulfill their role as his people." (emphasis in original) The tragedy of the slaughter of the babies and the citation of Jeremiah makes a similar point. In Jeremiah, the verses cited in Matthew are actually followed by signs of hope. The point: in Jesus, God is about to do something big.

And I guess that's the point of chapter 2. Pay attention to this baby. He's the One, the world-changer you're looking for.

*Caucasian males

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telegram from Japan

2009-08-24T18:33:00.004Z

A friend of mine showed me an email from K yesterday. K is a Japanese whom I got to know during my undergraduate days, a former journalist with Asahi Shimbun (I think) with aspirations of working for an F1 Team. He became a Christian during this time, and we lost contact after I graduated.

He's now back in Japan, and my friend had written to him after reminiscing about years gone by. And he wrote back! He says, paraphrased: "My time in Oxford feels so unreal now, like a dream. I wonder if it really happened...I've been telling my Sunday school here, actually only 2 children, about my Lord Jesus and how we should love him..."

That was really encouraging. Japan has so few Christians, so it is really hard to keep going. Run on, K!

Ah Long sequel

2009-08-21T21:08:00.004Z

This is one of my favourite videos of all time - Malaysian humour at its best. Long story short: kept me sane when I was taking my Finals exams 3 years ago now. Then I found out yesterday there was a sequel! Here it is: Ah Longs advertising Balsam Welding! (Probably should watch the first video beforehand)

Apologies to non-Malaysians, this is all going to appear very strange to you...

Carrying around death

2009-08-17T20:55:00.010Z

There's a particular phrase that, for some reason, refuses to be dislodged from the crevice of my mind today. It comes from Paul's second letter to the Corinthians, as found in the Bible. "We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus..." (4:10).

Mind-blowing, isn't it? I just can't get over it. We always carry around / in our body / the death of Jesus.

The spectre of death is present right from the beginning. This is an impassioned and deeply personal letter, and it throbs with emotional intensity. Imagine a dearly cherished friend, away in a foreign land, possibly a dangerous one. You're ripping the envelope apart the moment you spot that he's arrived in epistolary form in today's post. Bite your lip, as you read of some hardship so severe, that he "despaired even of life" (1:8) and felt the "sentence of death" (1:9). Try to ignore, unsuccessfully, the pangs of regret, about the previous "painful visit", where one of your own had spoken out against him. Hurts more than a hundred opponents. And that earlier letter of heartfelt admonishment - oh that letter! At least it's gone now - one filled with "great distress", "anguish of heart" and "many tears" (2:4). The sorrow from having to discipline someone on the same side is felt on both sides of this correspondence.

But our friend, Paul, knows who his God is. He is the "Father of mercies and God of all comfort" (1:3). Comfort, comfort, says Isaiah the prophet centuries ago. Comfort, comfort, Paul repeats, ten times in 5 verses (1:3-7). He is weak, but God's power works amidst such weakness, the most famous soundbite in this letter (12:9). All he needs is God's provision, for "our sufficiency is from God" (3:5 ESV). Not rhetoric, or charisma, or "success" shown in the absence of suffering, thus "proving" divine favour. The God who creates simply by speaking, and who removes veils from eyes, is at work; we only serve him (4:1ff). 'Paul therefore allows his humanness, his vulnerability, his seeming inadequacies to remain visible, so that when people look at him they will not see another paradigm of the myth of self-justification, but rather the fire of God's favour and power glowing through the translucent walls of an ordinary clay vessel.' [1]

We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. Four verse ten.

As I think about this, I find myself trying to escape the implications of what Paul is saying. To carry around the death of Jesus is basically saying, to die to myself every day. It's saying, persevere even though it's hard. And to persevere, you need to keep coming to Jesus, and not to yourself because that's the only way it's gonna happen. Gospel ministry can work no other way. But who wants to die? That difficult relationship with that person, when it's much easier, much less tiring to keep a distance? We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus. Tempted to subtly promote yourself, or put others down? We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus. Don't want to be awkward at the expense of truth and integrity? We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus.

Yes, I know, this Christianity thing, it's no mere psychological crutch, is it? But the promise is that true comfort, not a shallow one, is found from leaning on Jesus, who died and rose again for us. "So we do not lose heart" (4:16)

[1] An introduction to the New Testament: contexts, methods and ministry formation, David DeSilva, p.587

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9.58!!

2009-08-16T21:08:00.001Z

That's just a crazy time! Lightning Bolt strikes again!

Another to file under "Truth Stranger than Fiction"

2009-08-12T23:08:00.003Z

Dr. Burk Parsons, who works with R.C Sproul at Ligonier Ministries and Tabletalk Magazine - which some of my readers will know as a formidable bastion of Reformed theology - was an original Backstreet Boy! Yes those Backstreet Boys. With Brian, Nick, AJ and Howie. Really.

It gets better. He was then offered a chance to form NSync. Yes, the one with Mr. Sexy Back.

R.C Sproul and boy bands? You couldn't make this up. Btw, the whole interview in 4 parts with established Reformed blogger Challies is worth a read.

(HT: Between Two Worlds)

Books@Guardian

2009-08-12T22:29:00.003Z

The Guardian Books section has laid out a feast of sumptuous articles this week. First off, they highlight the Awful Library Books blog, which in turns features such gems as My Cat's in Love: How to Survive your feline's sex life and What's Wrong with my Snake?.

Their Top 10 list continues this week with the Top 10 teenage characters. Got a little excited at seeing Z for Zachariah on the list, a book currently lying about somewhere back home in Malaysia which I read ages and ages ago.

Then there's a tribute to Neil Gaiman. The comments thread was split. I've read Stardust and Coraline, which I enjoyed, but haven't quite seen that "it" factor that has his hardcore fans raving and has won him numerous Hugos. I would certainly be willing to pick up another Gaiman book. Even if he has also written a near-blasphemous Narnian short story, with adult themes and all. We shall speak no more of it.

Then there's the good bad book, i.e the books that you know are meant to be bad but you consume them anyway. I think GK Chesterton called them penny dreadfuls. That immediately caused a Malory Towers craving in me. And I guess the Star Wars Expanded Universe series falls in here as well (although the last one I read, Christie Golden's Omen, was pretty awful. See the relevant review here (spoiler alert!).

There's also The Travel Bookshop's 10 favourite travel reads.

OKlah, enough nerdiness dispensed.

Sunday School

2009-08-09T22:34:00.004Z

Despite the nerves, had a real blast teaching Sunday School today. Normally we split them up into more discrete age groups, but during the summer they get lumped into two groups: under 5s and 5-11s. I normally work with the under 5s, but was asked to step in to handle the 5-11s as a one-off. Such a wide age range was always going to be a nightmare! But I had real fun doing a drama with them - haven't done that for a while! - playing some silly game where I wasn't even sure of all the rules, and then doing a very short teaching slot on the Incarnation (!) and the danger of gnosticism (!!). Not in that kind of language of course! They're not that scary smart. Although I did show them a diagram which I stole from my notes on Christology. :-p The group were so charming, and some of them insisted on a very long playtime in the garden with me afterwards.

Do Sunday School every once in a while - it's a nice change and stops you from being overly serious and adult all the time!

Marriage

2009-08-08T20:21:00.000Z

I read with interest a provocative article that recently appeared in Christianity Today: The Case for Early Marriage. The author, Mark Regnerus, notes that current sexual/marital trends in the evangelical subculture, namely pledges of chastity and the like, have had minimal impact on our sexual behaviour. In America at least, we aren't that different from the world. He goes on to argue that this is primarily due to a deficient, even unbiblical, view of marriage. For all our defence of traditional marriage, we have simply come to view marriage as "a central source of human contentment" and "romantic love [as] the key gauge of its health". Thus, marriage has been transformed into an ideal. Result? Unsurprisingly, many young adults are now much more wary of entering something so 'big'. The message they hear is: get yourselves and your lives sorted out first. And so marriage, and sex, is put on hold. But, sex is hard to put on hold, hence our disappointingly worldly behaviour. There is also a demographic dimension: simply put, there are more women than men in church. And judging from conversations I've had, this seems to be true just about everywhere - East and West.

This, Regnerus argues, tends to exacerbate rather than solve the problem. He anticipates and answers objections such as economic insecurity, immaturity and so on. Marriage is, first and foremost, a covenant, where we learn what self-sacrifical love and commitment really looks like. "Chemistry wanes. Covenants don't". Marriage is not some ready-made perfect union where you will enjoy bliss upon exchanging rings, but a place where both partners will continue to be formed in character. In conclusion, young Christian couples who are maturing in their faith should be encouraged towards marriage.

Does a right, biblical view of marriage necessarily incline one towards early marriage? Maybe, maybe not. Certainly in my church circles, I would say people get married earlier than average, and that some definitely encourage this.

But whatever you think, Regnerus is absolutely right to point out that all too often, our views of marriage are misshappened. I know I want to claim that Hollywood and novels and pop music have not affected me one iota. Considering I just went "awww" this morning at this Sleepless in Seattle story while chomping on some bacon, I'll say my claim doesn't exactly rest on solid foundations.

Historically, Christians have given three answers to the purpose of marriage, as I only found out recently. There are
1. procreation
2. intimacy
3. societal order
with Roman Catholics typically majoring on the first and Protestants the second, and no one really wanting to champion the third! All three can be biblically supported. So although romance and chemistry has been downplayed somewhat in this post, they're clearly a gift that God blesses his world with, and married couples should not be ashamed to delight in it.

But all of this needs to be understood within a covenantal framework. That is, marriages are not in service to us, but in service to God. Marriages are not just about what goes on in the bedroom, but how they function as a social and family unit. Christopher Ash, who has thought about this subject deeply, shows this from a sensitive and compelling reading of Genesis 1 and 2*. I take it Regnerus agrees with him.

To be honest, I haven't thought about the whole "what is the nature of marriage" question at any length before, and the only reason I've dwelt on it more recently was due to one or two pastoral situations that arose this past year. (Isn't that usually the case?) It's very counter-cultural to my own thinking.

I'm still not completely sure if that mandates early marriage. I remember at a conference early this year, there was a "you should definitely be thinking about marriage" line handed down to all of us (who were mostly in early to mid-20s). But in many cases, most people were already seeking to get married. The question then becomes, are you being too fussy? Well, maybe. But maybe not. I don't think that it was necessarily wrong to encourage marriage. That is, to engender courage in people that getting married isn't a bad thing and you can trust God! But perhaps a parallel emphasis that singleness is also a gift from God was needed.

But I'm starting to get somewhat off-track. Anyway, an important subject to think about.

*Christopher Ash has written both a weighty theological tome on the subject, simply entitled Marriage, and a book for laypeople, Married for God. I've only read the latter. He has also written an excellent summary article for the Christ on Campus Initiative.

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Evening is the whole day

2009-08-06T20:13:00.003Z

I've recently finished Preeta Samarasan's novel - RRP hardback £16.99, I picked it up for £2.99 at Oxfam! I was a little apprehensive at first, wondering, probably unfairly, whether this was going to be pretentious and overbearing, but it exceeded my expectations. I'll probably go as far as saying it's the best Malaysian novel in English I ever read. Granted, that doesn't say much, considering I have not touched Rani Manicka, Tash Aw and Tan Twan Eng; my diet so far consisting of a few of the Silverfish collections, a tiny bit of K.S Maniam, and Adibah Amin in translation. And the last one probably doesn't count.

She exhibits very fine control over the narrative, subtly switching between the characters points of view and voice very well. The Manglish is spot on, and she captures the politics of family accurately enough that at times it made me squirm. I did feel Amma's transformation was a bit abrupt, and there were one or two things that didn't mesh perfectly, but those are rough edges that don't detract much from the overall novel.

Definitely worth picking up. I haven't given even a plot summary here, but for those of you who would like one, the NY Times review is your next click.

Wordsmiths: The Sympathy of Christ

2009-08-05T21:06:00.001Z

His incarnation is love stooping.
His sympathy is love weeping.
His compassion is love supporting.
His grace is love acting.
His teaching is the voice of love.
His silence is the repose of love.
His patience is the restraint of love.
His obedience is the labor of love.
His suffering is the travail of love.
His cross is the altar of love.
His death is the burnt offering of love.
His resurrection is the triumph of love.
His ascension into heaven is the enthronement of love.
His sitting down at the right hand of God is the intercession of love.

Such is the deep, the vast, the boundless ocean of Christ’s love!

— Octavius Winslow

HT: Of First Importance

Footnotes

2009-08-03T19:11:00.002Z

"If we forget that the newspapers are footnotes to Scripture and not the other way around, we will finally be afraid to get out of bed in the morning. The meaning of the world is most accurately given to us by God's Word."

- Eugene Peterson, Run with the Horses (cited in From Why to Worship, Jonathan Lamb, p.41)

Taking stock

2009-07-20T18:49:00.003Z

Angry in Malaysia by Tan Soo Inn

"My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow
to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about
the righteous life that God desires. Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and
the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you,
which can save you." (James 1:19-21 TNIV)

If you are a follower of Jesus in Malaysia, you are probably angry. Consider
the following...

Read the whole thing.

Alpha

2009-07-17T20:19:00.003Z

I've just finished watching a documentary on Alpha on Channel 4 (limited time online; not sure if non-UK viewers would be able to access it). This was of special interest to me since the church previewed is literally just down the road from me, and I have friends who've gone there. It's quite interesting. On the surface at least, pretty even-handed; going for a more descriptive approach. Although there were a few throw-away lines that insinuated that this was a bit of a slick marketing operation. For example, saying that there were pretty girls on hand to serve you food seemed to me deeply unfair in what it implied. Plus the Nicky Gumbel/Tony Blair comparison, which btw, for those of you not in Britain, shouldn't necessarily be taken as a compliment.

Still, it's always interesting to see how Christians are perceived, and always just as interesting to see what sort of questions non-Christians have. There was the line about religion being all about inclusivity, whether Christianity was really more of a psychological experience, and the person who found Jesus off-putting. Disappointingly, the show actually didn't dwell that much on the small group time, preferring, somewhat understandably, to dwell on the various agnostics and their backgrounds instead.

The narrator concluded that Alpha, in the end, was "organised niceness", run by decent people, with just that weird element of trying to get people to speak in tongues on the weekend (I'm afraid I'm not sold on this idea, looking at 1 Corinthians 14?) What the programme does show is that people do have real questions, and that not everyone is a New Atheist™. I was slightly disappointed by the way in which some of the answers seem to have been answered. But the programme only provided a few glimpses of such moments, so it's unfair to judge them on such scant evidence.

There have recently been some questions about whether things like Alpha or Christianity Explored are out of step with the times, and more importantly, whether they come across as being too much like a "package". My own thinking at the moment is that, like most things, they have their place. What we must work hard at is getting our bearings right. So, it isn't a short-cut, nor is it a synonym for evangelism, or indeed, the power and source of salvation.

I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile. For in the gospel a righteousness from God is revealed, a righteousness that is by faith from first to last,[a] just as it is written: "The righteous will live by faith".
Romans 1:16-17

Book Log

2009-07-14T18:56:00.006Z

An overdue update...

Planet Narnia – Michael Ward
Currently reading. Got this as a gift via an Amazon voucher from my lovely international team, after my boss overheard me talking about it (I think!). Fun reading literary criticism again. In case you haven’t heard of this, Dr. Michael Ward argues that Narnia is based on the seven heavens of medieval imagination. Chapter on Sol was particularly compelling!

A Praying Life – Paul Miller
I have surprisingly few books on prayer, and so thought a refresher would be good. This one exceeded my expectations. I can safely say there’s probably no other book on prayer like this one. Miller applies the gospel to our prayer life and makes us want to pray. Could have more on praying for things we don’t naturally incline to (eg. churches in faraway lands we know little about). But very much recommended.

Why There Almost Certainly is a God – Keith Ward
Great little book which gently but devastatingly takes apart Dawkin’s thesis. Witty, readable, philosophically inclined. Ward is a liberal Christian, so I have fundamental disagreements with him, eg. universalism, but worth a look for the discerning reader.

Beginning Well – Gordon T. Smith
Intermediate level book on what conversion actually is. Something I’m trying to think about, being involved in international student ministry. Ecumenically-minded, drawing from many traditions. Probably needs reread with pencil in hand? For a more introductory book, see Stephen Smallman’s Spiritual Birthline.

Theology in the Context of World Christianity – Timothy Tennent
Missions professor, recently appointed as president of Asbury Seminary. Reflects on issues of concern to global Christians which might not necessarily be obvious to Western Christians, eg. sin as guilt or shame?, the relationship of the Bible to other sacred texts, Jesus as Ancestor in the African context.

The Lost History of Christianity – Philip Jenkins
Well-known author of The Next Christendom explores Christian history in the Middle East, Africa and Asia and so fills a gap, as most Christian history books on the market focus on the West. (This is definitely changing with a recent glut of books on this subject). I struggled at times because my knowledge was shown to be really lacking, eg. not quite sure what Byzantium empire is really all about. Billed as introductory but still not easy reading. Nonetheless, important book.

The Tipping Point – Malcolm Gladwell
Yes, I know I’m really late on this one! But fascinating read even if his case is a bit overstated at points. See also critique of Gladwell’s thesis by Duncan Watts.

One Good Turn – Kate Atkinson
Took this on my recent mission trip as my light reading! Melancholy literary detective thriller, tracing how a road rage incident in Edinburgh changes the lives of everyone involved. I think I prefer her earlier book, Case Histories.

The Declaration – Gemma Malley
Interesting premise: what if we found a cure for aging? What would the world look like, especially with the threat of overpopulation? Good, but contrary to blurb, isn’t quite in the league of Meg Rosoff’s How I Live Now. The writing occasionally relies too much on the omniscient narrator.

A mission report

2009-07-07T19:11:00.002Z

I’m back! Got in late last night, straight to bed, and straight to work this morning. And now combating jet-lag, especially since while I could take it easy today, tomorrow is a pretty full day. No falling asleep in Bible study tomorrow night!

My 2 weeks away definitely counts as one of my highlights of the year. Possibly the highlight of the year. I was pretty apprehensive beforehand, but I’m now so glad I went. Can’t give you complete details unfortunately, as we do have long-term mission partners out there and so I shouldn’t do anything that would compromise their position, however slight.

We usually started the day with training sessions. The first was more biblically-oriented, as we thought about one key aspect of the Bible’s story (eg. creation, cross, resurrection) and how we might share the gospel in a cross-cultural context. The second session concentrated more on the culture of this particular country and some the particular challenges. We usually ended the day, just before dinner, with a devotion from Philippians – I led one of them – and prayer.

We also got, over the course of the 2 weeks, to meet both with believers and non-believers. It was a great experience, and often surprising, too! (People are very open in this country). For instance, I ended up chatting about George Whitefield, Jonathan Edwards and David Brainerd with one believer, which was a topic of conversation I can safely say I wasn’t expecting. Or in another chat with an unbeliever, I was rather taken aback by one of her objections, which was basically premised on a feminist reading of the Bible (isn’t it just a partriarchal tool designed to suppress women etc. etc.?). Now I might expect such an objection from an Oxbridge student, but certainly not from someone in this country! It was also good to be able to actually do an impromptu study on the rich young ruler (Mark 10:17ff) with another seeker. And it was really interesting to experience church in another culture, which is not quite like the models we’re more used to.

I think one of the things I also appreciated was seeing how much we have in common with other believers in other contexts. Contextualization is a word we often bandy about, and that’s not a bad thing. I work with international students, and I often get frustrated in trying to work out, and in getting people to see, that you can’t do things the exact same way with them as you do with local British students! But we mustn’t push this too far. In many respects, wherever you are, the challenges and issues are the same.

I also really appreciated just watching our mission partners and what they do day-to-day. You get a much better sense of how to pray for them, what are the issues they face, and so on. It was great to have some good chats with them. I especially enjoyed having dinner with one of them (whom I already knew previously) and getting a bit of one-to-one time in which I was on the receiving end of "ministry", as it were! He had some really good advice as I try to think through what I might be doing for the next 3 years or so.

I loved my team too. I have to say, I suspect it’s unusual to have a team in which the dynamics work out so well. That was definitely an answer to prayer.

So I’ve painted a very rosy picture so far, but as always, that isn’t quite the full picture. I did have some difficult moments. I anticipated the language barrier to be a problem when I came, and there was one day in particular where I had to remind myself that "I’m justified by faith, not by linguistic ability". There were certainly times where I felt like I had been pretty rubbish at serving others and not myself. Nonetheless, it was worth it. At the end of the trip, we did a short questionnaire designed to help us reflect on our experience. And one of the things this trip reminded me was that God is the same God no matter where we are, and Christ is what we need no matter who we are. This trip also helped sharpen my focus. Now anyone who knows me knows that I am anti anti-intellectualism, and that I am convinced good theology is essential to our spiritual health. I’m still convinced. But there is a kind of danger, especially for those of us who often read the many Christian and biblioblogs out there, that we end up in some rather pointless academic debates or stuff that frankly, people don’t care about!

Thanks again for your prayers, and it’s definitely worth thinking about going on a short-terms mission trip if you have the chance!

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Gone fishing

2009-06-18T18:50:00.003Z

Not that anyone would notice, but just to say I'm away from next Monday for the next 2 weeks. I'm on a summer mission team to an undisclosed location. Am having mixed feelings: looking forward to it but am also nervous at the same time! I'll be meeting students, and will also lead at least one devotional. I won't have much internet access, and even if I do, will definitely not be blogging.

Do pray for me. Maybe when I get back, I'll actually attempt to get back to semi-regular blogging again!

What I did

2009-06-06T19:18:00.002Z

What's happened since my last post:

This blog turned 5! :-0

Organised and led a sort-of-evangelistic event (badly)!

Saw my parents.

Spent some time wrestling with Mark 2:1-12 for a preaching workshop, and then subsequently gave a 10-minute preach on the passage - first time I've preached from the gospels.

Read a few more books - will try to update the sidebar soon! Tim Tennent's thoughtful book on theological reflection in global Christianity was especially stimulating.

Got upset as I handled, with counsel from others, a tricky pastoral issue.

Realised that Sharon was ready to stone me if I didn't get in that article I promised her for church magazine soon, so blitzed it and sent it to her Thursday. Am now starting to wonder if i should actually try to get it published in a Malaysian Christian magazine...

Finally found a night to go to the cinema to watch Star Trek. :)

Conceded that Barcelona were the far superior team.

Went woohoo as Magic got into NBA Finals...you can do it!

Cleaned my room!

The Space Between

2009-05-22T21:32:00.004Z

I'm sure it sounds like a strange thing to say, but I was feeling particularly unMalaysian this week. So it was really nice to go to an event tonight where I was surrounded by Malaysians - the most Malaysians I've seen in one place in nearly 2 years if you don't count last year's Christmas hols when I was home. I went to hear a well-known Malaysian political figure speak - I won't mention his name right now, but you all know who he is. Even asked a question, which is rare for me since I'm usually silent at Q&A sessions since I never come up with anything good to ask. That hasn't changed - my question was pretty lousy and I wished I'd sharpened it up!

But I am in a strange place right now. I'm currently part of a British world, yet not part of it. Like something grafted on. There're so many things I just don't understand or am not comfortable with. But I'm going to need time to feel fully Malaysian again, I suspect. I remember just thinking about all the conversations I heard when I was back, and again when I (unintentionally!) eavesdropped on another conversation amongst Malaysians just a few days ago, and just being surprised at the content and manner of those conversations. I always knew that when I eventually come back, I'm going to have to deal with reverse culture shock but it's really been hammered home this year.

I think I really have a much better idea what missionaries go through compared to as recently as 6 months ago. And this is without even suffering a linguistic handicap! Sure I've read up a little on cross-cultural issues, but being immersed in a situation where I work alongside British colleagues and with (mainly) East Asian students, with virtually no contact with Malaysians, whew! Different ball game altogether.

But I know this is a good opportunity too, to just learn, learn to depend on God, learn what it really means to be part of the people of God, learn to expand my worldview, while I remain in this strange place. For one more year, God willing. It is really hard. Thankfully I know one person who is in a similar position to mine, and hopefully we'll get to have at least one time each month where we can share stuff, but in the day-to-day, it can be tiring not to have that resting place available to you. Or just as likely, I haven't learnt yet what it means to rest in God. There's an absolutely brilliant chapter on ambivalence in Dan Allender's book The Healing Path and here's a great line which I need to hear daily: "Faith that is founded on the memory of God's intrusion into my story and hope which is freed in the imagination of God's promise to shape my story for good combine to enable me to open my heart and live for love today."

Sorry, but outside this blog, wasn't sure where I else I could dump some of my ruminations... :)

Dude, where's my Bible?

2009-05-11T18:36:00.005Z

I, and I know others as well, was really struck by an extended metaphor in yesterday's sermon. It's actually quite cheesy, absurd even. But maybe that's part of its staying power. It was certainly effective, stubbornly refusing to disappear like that stain on my kitchen table.

Imagine the Bible in my car. Where would it be? At this point, I thought we would be heading towards the Bible as engine, but that's not where we ended up. Is it

1. in the boot? Out of sight, out of mind? Something we sort of know is there, but in practice it may as well not exist?
2. in the backseat? Like an annoying backseat driver whom we just want to chuck out, or at least tune out?
3. in the front seat? We appreciate him as a conversation partner, a dispenser of good advice, and hey, like a good map, frequently worth consulting. But it's us that's still in the driving seat.
4. in the driving seat? Allowing it to lead us wherever we are?

This is actually a very helpful taxonomy and really gave me pause as to whether I'm allowing God's word to shape me as it should.

The literary critic George Steiner makes a point worth considering in relation to this. In a well-known essay, Steiner distinguishes between a critic and a reader. While recognising that this antithesis is, in reality, a false one, he employs it to make a salient point about how we approach a text. The "critic" becomes the judge and master of the text, whereas a "reader" is servant to the text. The former retains a distance, the latter attempts to draw near. But the former, in doing so, turns the text into a commodity; he empties it of any "real presence". Steiner is not dismissing criticism per se, that's his vocation after all! But only as readers first can we offer proper respect to the text, and by implication, its author. To be a "critic" first and foremost only serves to stoke the ego.

I think that's where the danger lies as we struggle to be disciples of Jesus. As we seek to "grow up in our salvation" (1 Peter 2:2), we sometimes confuse our increasingly sophisticated reading of the Bible with genuine Christ-like maturity. The pastor-scholar Dan Doriani, commenting on James 1:19-21, very insightfully maps out the potential pitfalls. As a new Christian, our reading might be naive and devotional. We have our highlighter pens out, as we earnestly desire to hear God's voice. Hopefully, we learn to be better readers, placing texts in their contexts. Maybe we even advance to becoming technical readers, with knowledge of Greek, biblical culture etc. As part of the community of believers, we become technical-functional readers, personally detached, even as we share our insights with others. But what we really need, Doriani suggests, is to become technical-devotional readers. Every technical skill remains, but we need to rediscover that child-like desire to let the word speak directly to our hearts again.

I currently read the Bible one-to-one with a younger Christian. And I increasingly see that unless I allow the Bible to really speak to me, to probe me, to be "consumed by the text", to use Steiner's language, I don't really have anything to teach. Or learn actually. A truly sophisticated reading of the Bible is one which reads our lives as well and seeks to "live into God's story", to borrow a phrase from Eugene Peterson. And that's really scary. So I need to ask myself regularly: Dude, where's my Bible?

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Religion and the public square at Veritas

2009-05-10T21:17:00.004Z

I was at the Veritas Forum at Oxford University on Thursday Night. I very nearly didn't go, as I was quite tired and I knew I had a pretty full Friday coming up. But I didn't really want to let my inviter down, and besides, the topic was a good one: the role of religion in the public square. The speakers were Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer, Head of Jewish-Muslim Relations for the Chief Rabbi of the U.K., Bishop Michael Nazir-Ali, who's currently at the forefront of the debates regarding the future of the Anglican Communion, and Professor Tariq Ramadan, who teaches at the University of Oxford and whom you see regularly quoted in the (British) media.

As you can imagine, the debate was pitched at a pretty high-level, and it took supreme effort on my part to concentrate. I didn't take any notes either, so I'm afraid there won't be any blow-by-blow account of the evening here! But it was certainly interesting. I was especially intrigued by Tariq Ramadan. His opening statement (all the speakers were given 5 minutes to make one) was essentially a lecture in hermeneutics, where he went on for a little bit about the need for context. He also distinguished between two authorities - here I lost him a little because either he was mumbling or my seating position wasn't great for the acoustics - but it seemed to me like he endorsed some version of a public/private split. I can't remember the exact phrase now, but he did have some pithy statement on the relationship between principles and ethics; basically, he defended his right to believe while accepting the need to negotiate with rival traditions in the public square.

But his biggest point, which he repeated throughout the evening, was the need to be consistent with one's own values. And after setting such a high standard for himself, he failed to meet it, it seemed to me. On the one hand, he would uphold "universal values" such as equality, but on the other hand, he would revert to some form of social constructivism at points. The other thing I struggled with was figuring out how distinctively Islamic Professor Ramadan's position was. I knew he belonged to the reformist camp within Islam, but I don't remember him quoting the Quran even once, or using Islamic doctrine as a springboard, although Bishop Nazir-Ali, more than once, invited him to do so. In some ways, I almost wonder if his views could have come from a secularist, although that's probably overstating it, and I'm sure Professor Ramadan would insist he is working within an Islamic framework. For him, the thing most needed in the Muslim world was simply more education. By contrast, both Bishop Nazir-Ali and Rabbi Dr. Brawer were not afraid to use the Torah/Talmud and the Bible as sources for their reflections, as they should. I don't think I was the only one who thought so, during the Q&A, a Muslim student in the audience challenged Professor Ramadan to show how his views were part of mainstream Islamic thought. (Obviously, I have insufficient knowledge to make a judgment).

Dr. Brawer was arguably the clearest of the speakers, but also the least interesting, as he didn't really say all that much. Bishop Nazir-Ali, I thought, acquitted himself pretty well. Although there was a point in the discussion where it was all about just war, and I wasn't sure if that was just a tangent. Towards the end of the evening, we got an especially sharp disagreement on what constituted "Judeo-Christian tradition" and its impact on European civilisation. Professor Ramadan insisted that the contribution of Islam to Europe must not be overlooked, whereas Bishop Nazir-Ali defended the Judeo-Christian tradition as necessary to provide the necessary undergirdings for Europe as they cope with the challenges of the future. To put it another way, Bishop Nazir-Ali thinks that we need a Judeo-Christian foundation if we want an increasingly plural society to remain inclusive. (Nazir-Ali had earlier made a distinction between civic and religious pluralism, which I think is an important one)

Like I said, it was a sprawling discussion, and certainly quite academic, so I'm not even sure if I represented anyone fairly! But this continues to be an important topic, especially as mainstream commentators are beginning to recognise that God is back on the agenda.

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Wordsmiths: Goodnight / They Sit Together on the Porch

2009-05-09T21:48:00.005Z

It's been ages and ages since I've actually featured a wordsmith, since I moved back to Oxford, I think! So I thought I may as well do two wordsmiths at one go! I've stolen the first one from Steve McCoy's National Poetry Month blogfest. The second is from Wendell Berry, a writer who's thought long and hard about the natural world, and whom I would love to get to know more. Both, I guess, are loosely connected thematically and capture the way a day fades away beautifully. Enjoy! (Photo: Michael Dressel. For previous wordsmiths featured on this blog, click here.)

Goodnight by David Ferry
Lying in bed and waiting to find out
Whatever is going to happen: the window shade

Making its slightest sound as the night wind,
Outside, in the night, breathes quietly on it;

It is parental hovering over the infantile;
Something like that; it is like being a baby,

And over the sleep of the baby there is a father,
Or mother, breathing, hovering; the streetlight light

In the nighttime branches breathing quietly too;
Altering; realtering; it is the body breathing;

The crib of knowing: something about what the day
Will bring; and something about what the night will hold,

Safely, at least for the rest of the night, I pray.

They Sit Together on the Porch by Wendell Berry

They sit together on the porch, the dark
Almost fallen, the house behind them dark.
Their supper done with, they have washed and dried
The dishes–only two plates now, two glasses,
Two knives, two forks, two spoons–small work for two.
She sits with her hands folded in her lap,
At rest. He smokes his pipe. They do not speak,
And when they speak at last it is to say
What each one knows the other knows. They have
One mind between them, now, that finally
For all its knowing will not exactly know
Which one goes first through the dark doorway, bidding
Goodnight, and which sits on a while alone.

Who am I behind closed doors?

2009-05-05T21:40:00.006Z

This really hit home for me today in my quiet time:

...You may have heard these words (or some variation on them) quoted before: "What a man is in secret, in these private duties, that he is in the eyes of God and no more" [John Owen]...

...It is not my visible service so much as my hidden life of devotion that is the index of my spirituality. That is not to despise my public life, but to anchor its reality to the ocean bed of personal fellowship with God. I may speak or pray [ed's note: or blog!] with zeal and eloquence in public. I may appear to others to be master of myself when in company. But what happens when I close the door behind myself and only the Father sees me?

- Where God Looks First (p.159), In Christ Alone, Sinclair Ferguson

Malaysian issues

2009-05-02T21:24:00.006Z

On current form, I'm afraid this blog is probably going to be nothing more than a linking outpost for a little bit.

There was an interesting survey, albeit a little dated, to discover the view of Malaysian Muslims on questions of identity, as well as related issues and concerns. Makes for interesting reading, and some of the findings were surprising, at least to me.

More contemporary is the recent ruling on the conversion of children in divorce cases where one of the spouses have converted. There's a good summary and analysis of the issues involved at the Nut Graph.

(HT: Ps. Sivin)

Bulls-Celtics

2009-05-02T20:59:00.002Z

Wish I could be watching! If you're not an NBA fan, basically what was expected to be a rather blase first-round series has turned out to be one of the best first rounds ever. Game 7, the final game is tonight. Game 6 highlights below. As someone whose primary strength is shooting, I was enthralled by Ray Allen here.

Gavin Peacock's new career

2009-04-26T21:39:00.004Z

People might enjoy this piece on Gavin Peacock, former Premiership footballer - I remember him from his time at Chelsea (when they still had players like Paul Furlong and Frank Sinclair! How Chelsea have changed from the mid-90s), now studying to be a pastor.

(HT: Stephen Murray)

Keller on substitutionary love at the LMC

2009-04-19T20:50:00.011Z

I was at the London Men's Convention yesterday, my second time, but first as a mere conference-goer. I really enjoyed my first time two years ago, where I served as a steward at the Royal Albert Hall. So upon seeing the theme this year was basically "Jesus" (what can be more crucial than that?), and that the main speakers included Tim Keller and Mike Cain (author of this winsome book), I was ready to make another trip! And of course, getting to use it to spend a day with the brother is great too. :)

Thank God for Tim Keller and the gifts he's given him. The danger for many evangelicals, of course, is that we have our own celebrity culture, where we put too many individuals on a pedestal. So, deep breath, remind myself: Tim Keller is a sinner saved by the grace of God. Tim Keller needs a Saviour, and he is dependent on the Holy Spirit. With that in mind...anyone who has followed this blog long enough will know that I'm a bit of a fan, and his talks yesterday, on the cross and resurrection respectively, were just superb. He's a no-frills preacher, laidback, no gimmicks, faithful. But he is so insightful, both in his reading of the biblical text, and of the world we live in. When he preaches, he makes truth fresh, obvious, and it gets at your heart.

I was going to blog my notes from the first talk here, but sadly, I left my notes at a friend's place, so I don't have them at hand. But hurray, a quick search turned up someone else's (well-written) blogged notes! Like me, and I suspect, just about everyone in the hall, it was Keller's point on love as substitution which he found most arresting. So I'm just going to point you to his notes.

A preview:
Keller identifies three substitutionary motifs in John’s account of the death of Jesus:

Jesus as the Passover Lamb: shown by the specific reference to "hyssop" in v.29 (see Exodus 12:22) and the fact that Jesus’ bones remain unbroken.
Jesus as the Rock: Dr Keller linked John’s description of "blood and water" pouring from Jesus’ pierced side to Paul’s puzzling statement in 1 Corinthians 10:4: "the rock was Christ". Paul is referring to the incident in Exodus 17, where the Israelites "quarrelled and tested the Lord" in the desert. Instead of Moses’ rod (a symbol of judgment and authority) striking the Israelites for their disobedience, it came down on the rock, which thus produced the water the people needed. In the same way, God’s judgment against sin struck Jesus rather than us.
Jesus as the Ransom: his cry of "It is finished!" has connotations of "The debt is paid!"

Read the rest here and here.

In response, what can we say but thank you so much, Lord Jesus, please help me to live for you in light of what you've done?

Takeaways from the getaway: On Jesus Christ!

2009-04-10T00:07:00.002Z

This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. - 1 John 4:10

We didn't have a theme song on our retreat, but as the week went on, it became clear that this was the song that fit best with the messages we were hearing from 1 John. It was certainly the song that I personally found most arresting that week! And it's an appropriate response, I think, this Good Friday.

Consider Christ
Consider Christ, the source of our salvation
That he should take the penalty for me
Though he was pure, a lamb without a blemish;
He took my sins and nailed them to the tree

My Lord and God
You are so rich in mercy
Mere words alone are not sufficient thanks.
So take my life, transform, renew and change me
That I might be a living sacrifice

Consider Christ, that he could trust his Father
In the garden of Gethsemane
Though full of dread and fearful of the anguish;
He drank the cup that was reserved for me.

Consider Christ, for death he has defeated.
And he arose, appeared for all to see.
And now he sits at God’s right hand in heaven
Where he prepares a resting place for me.

©1996 Bryson Smith & Philip Percival

Listen here.

New Cabinet

2009-04-09T21:22:00.004Z

The Malaysian Insider has a breakdown of Prime Minister Najib's new cabinet.

Political analyst Khoo Kay Peng says elsewhere that it lacks the wow factor, but truth be told, it was hard to see how Najib could ever find that elusive magic wand. Unless he installed lots of unknowns, but he would probably have ended up with a "what?!" factor instead. Or invited PAS to form some sort of unity government (joke!!!). I wonder if there's a bit of a talent gap in the next generation of politicians? The Cabinet could definitely be trimmed some more - I've always been baffled by the existence of the Federal Territories Ministry.

All in all, nothing all that surprising. We haven't seen the end of the aftershocks from the political tsunami of March 8 just yet.

Takeaways from the getaway: on thinking about other religions

2009-04-08T21:28:00.006Z

There were various seminars on offer at the student getaway, and I was asked to co-lead one on other religions. Now I’m patently not an expert on world religions, and when you factor in that people can spend 3 years in university doing religious studies, and I had 75 minutes...the task seemed gargantuan! So when I sat down to think how I would do this seminar, I had to think about what I wanted to achieve with it. And one of the big things I came up with was to try to model (very much imperfectly) how to think about the topic of other religions from an explicitly Christian perspective. I thought I’ll offer here some bits and parts from that seminar and how I attempted to run it.

I ran the seminar 3 times over the week, and each time I started by asking why people were in my seminar. They fell primarily into 2 camps: one camp felt as if they had absolutely no knowledge on the subject, and so wanted more information. One or two of them were perhaps motivated by the increasingly multi-cultural nature of British society. The other camp were those who would inevitably say, "I have a friend who is..." and so they wanted to, essentially, know how to be a good Christian and friend.

I then tried to show that while we had all sorts of good questions and agendas in coming to the seminar, and indeed, to the Bible, it would be helpful to begin from another starting point. In essence, before asking our questions, I wanted us to take a step back and proceed to ask, what is the biblical story? After all, if we call ourselves Christians, we would inevitably want to take the Bible as our authority, our foundational story. But just as importantly, I wanted people to see that the Bible wasn’t just a 'Christian' book, but made even grander claims than that. It claims for itself that it is the narrative of everything, from the beginning to the end of history. It focuses in on particular individuals, families and nations, but it is actually telling the story of humanity. And so the Bible is for all peoples, of every religious background, of every age. To ram home the point, I included this great quote from a Hindu scholar to Leslie Newbigin, a missionary in India for many years and who’s written extensively on the topic of mission – some of my readers might be familiar with him. This Hindu scholar said:

"I can’t understand why you missionaries present the Bible to us in India as a book of religion. It is not a book of religion – and anyway we have plenty of books of religion in India. We don’t need any more! I find in your Bible a unique interpretation of universal history, the history of the whole creation and the history of the whole human race. And therefore a unique interpretation of the human person as a responsible actor in history. That is unique. There is nothing else in the whole religious literature of the world to put alongside it."

And so the Bible, while not necessarily answering every single specific question we have, nonetheless gives us fixed points in our reflections on this question. It gives us the shape of the story we’re in.

I then went through 4 questions:
1. Who is God?
2. Who are we?
3. What’s gone wrong?
4. What’s God plan for the world?

And tried to go through these questions in light of the issue of other religions. Let me highlight how I tried to do this with the first question. Firstly, I went to Psalm 97, and asked what we learnt about God from it. From Psalm 97, and from quite a few of the other psalms, especially those that stress God’s kingship, we can learn quite a bit! I then asked how what we learn about God here impacts how we think about other religions. What does the truth, for example, of God as God of all nations shape our thinking? Or the fact that there is only one God? I argued that (although I have to confess I’m not completely sure if this is that explicit in Psalm 97!) that we find both a challenge and an invitation to adherents of other religions. Another way of putting it, which I learnt from my seminar co-leader, is "subversive fulfilment" (which might also be borrowed from Newbigin!). The gospel comes as fulfillment of the religious longing in the heart of humankind. Yet the gospel also stands in contradiction to human wisdom twisted by sin.

I then went to Acts, and one example of how Paul allowed this fixed point to shape his engagement with people of other religions. In Acts 14:8-18, we find the story of Paul and Barnabas in Lystra, where they perform a healing. Immediately news spread and they are feted as gods. And so Paul uses this as a preaching opportunity. But he does so aware of his audience, who would have been pagans who followed traditional Greek popular religion. Earlier on in Acts 13, he had preached to a Jewish audience, but he can’t employ the same rhetorical methods here.

So he begins with common ground, with their shared humanity (v.15), correcting their mistaken notions in the process. He then proclaims the truth that there is one Creator God (v.15b), and indeed He is a God who is sovereign over all the nations (v.16). He then moves on to the truth that God has revealed himself (v.17), that He is the provider and sustainer of life. That would particularly resonate with his hearers, from an agrarian culture, but implicitly it posed a challenge too, since that meant Zeus, the god of vegetation and weather, whom they worshipped, wasn’t in control! Paul had mixed results (v.18-19).

And so I did the same with the rest of the questions (although I think my one on sin was quite superficial!). If we’re all made in the image of God, then surely we need to think of all human beings in that sense first before we think of them as Hindu/Muslim etc. If God left us with a cultural mandate in Genesis 1:26-28, then surely it is right to celebrate aspects of culture which are not blasphemous, although the question of how to disentangle culture from religion is a much more complex one which I steered away from! And so on.

I suppose one thing I realised and would have liked to rectify in my seminar was that Jesus did get sidelined a little. One of the interesting things in Paul’s sermon in Acts 14 is that he doesn’t mention Jesus at all, but I’m pretty sure he would have eventually got there if he had time and opportunity. But he needed to lay the ground first with people whose worldviews must have been radically different from his.

Jesus is mentioned, of course, in question 4, but otherwise I didn’t really think through how he would have fitted in. In John Dickson’s book, A Spectator’s Guide to Other Religions, he has an interesting chapter near the end called “What’s Wrong with Jesus?” in which he shows how Jesus just doesn’t fit into any of the other religions various doctrines or ethics or philosophies, and that’s one way to do it. I recommended John’s book in the seminar, btw, and I was interested to notice that it sold out at the bookstore by the end of the week! I should be in marketing...

One other thing I’ve learnt, 75 minutes is pittance. Not once in the three times I ran my seminar did we get through all our material. Admittedly I was pretty interactive and so allowed people to come back at me rather than rigidly stick to what was in my outline. But still, it’s amazing how quickly time flies! The second time I ran it was probably the smoothest, probably because people seemed to have their expectations adjusted accordingly.

Well, it’s the first time I’ve done anything like this, and so it was a good learning experience. I’m not sure how much I helped students - I certainly hope so!

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Takeaways from the getaway: on Sehnsucht

2009-04-06T21:04:00.006Z

This time it was the mattress in the corner of the room.

It had been a great Tuesday at the student getaway. Good conversations, and a sense that people had been helped by the seminar I was presenting. Even better was the 10 minutes when I walked into the kitchen to calm my nerves just before the start of the main evening session, which I was due to lead for the first time. There I found a friend, feeling a little downhearted that the day hadn’t quite gone the way he hoped. A few words of encouragement, then heads bowed low and hands clasped. More words – petitions delivered upward this time. Nice warm fuzzy feelings. Then off I went to lead the session and enjoyed it very much. Even shockingly managed to deliver a half-intended gag with perfect comic timing. And bags of fun after Bible time.

Before you know it, it was time to call it a night. I meandered into my room, looked at my mattress, and then all of a sudden, I felt inexplicably...sad.

But why? The day had turned out better than I expected. And perhaps sadness is not quite the best word for it. Because it wasn’t as if all those mountain peaks of jubilation, those feelings of bliss, had altogether evaporated. Perhaps, bittersweetness is the better term. A little like a cocktail of spirits and bitters. Great day, sure but midnight beckons. Another day. It was fun while it lasted. All good things must come to an end. Etcetera.

And I knew what it was. That nagging feeling that we’re not quite there yet, that yearning for “more”, whatever that was. Sehnsucht. Christian scholar David Naugle, in Reordered Love, Reordered Lives, has the lowdown:

The German term Sehnsucht describes this obstinate aspiration for something that satisfies even though we seem perpetually estranged from it. Amidst the storms and stresses of daily life, this "inconsolable longing" gets triggered unexpectedly and stabs us in mind and heart with a “pang” in most unexpected ways and times. Whether it’s elicited by a blue sky, a beautiful face, the melancholy of a requiem, the lure of romance, the crashing waves of the sea, the scintillations of sex, the profundity of a film, an illuminating line of poetry, a beautiful song, or an unobstructed view of the Milky Way, we occasionally experience a mysterious and tremendous feeling that attracts and baffles us simultaneously. We need “it” and want “it”, whatever “it” is. We are convinced it is what we have been searching for all our lives. (p.28)

But was it such a bad thing? Well, surely yes? Why would I want my feelings of joy to be contaminated by all these unwanted dregs of melancholy? Unless I’m a masochist. Or is this how it’s going to be all the time? Never 100% happy. Suddenly that Buddhist doctrine of getting rid of all desire doesn’t sound so strange after all.

But when I think about it, I begin to see, that far from a curse, Sehnsucht can be a gift from God. What if I never experience it? I'm saying I’m happy with current lot, with the world as it is. It’s the shrug of resignation. But I’m not happy with the world as it is. I shouldn’t be. Life, relationships, work went well that day. But not always. It certainly didn’t go as well later on in the week. I’m not in Eden anymore. Things go awry. I go awry.

Sehnsucht is that sudden jolt that I’m in a foreign land. I bear traces of Eden, and the world bears traces of Eden. But the garden doesn’t exist anymore. I’m homeless. I hear the echo of a tune I’ve never heard, news from a country I’ve never visited, as C.S Lewis memorably puts it, in Sehnsucht. For, as Lewis also suggested, the Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are far too easily pleased. God is looking to whet our appetite, ring the alarm to prevent complacency. And it reminds me too, that the loveliness of what I'm seeing is but a window into what it will be like, all the time, when God comes to take his children home.

Bittersweetness. But I shouldn’t just look at the first two syllables, but the last 2 as well. Sadness and longing, but satisfaction and contentment as well. The cross and the subsequent gift of the Holy Spirit makes that possible. I don’t just gain a new status, but a new life when God made me, us, his disciples. No longer a wanderer, but a pilgrim. And so a new mission. Surely that dispels any talk of being too heavenly minded to be of no earthly good. On the contrary.

That wasn’t the first time I experienced Sehnsucht, and it won’t be my last. When I looked at the mattress that night, it symbolised the end of one day which happened to be good, with no guarantee that the next would be similar. Jesus’ words take on a new poignancy then: "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." Rest now? Maybe, maybe not. But a Sabbath-rest spent in the presence of God in the new creation; definitely.

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Takeaways from the getaway: On Doubt

2009-04-04T21:17:00.007Z

If only to try to provide grist for this blog, I've decided on this cheesily titled series 'Takeaways from the getaway' (cue groans), where some of my reflections et al. on the recent student getaway I was on will be used as jumping off points for some of my posts.

When in doubt, tell the truth
– Mark Twain

I’ve gotten to know someone who is doing postdoctoral work here in biochemistry a little. He is not a believer, although he occasionally comes to church, and we tend to have a chat after the evening service when I see him. Often, he asks me what I’ve been up to during the week gone by. And to my shame, sometimes my stomach tightens up and goes all squishy at the same time. I mumble something about some of the practical work I get up to, maybe mention the Bible study prep that took up Monday night. And I become intensely aware that I’ve received the unwanted blessing of X-ray vision and see his internal eyebrow rising a little too high.

And I imagine him being similarly endowed with supernatural vision and catching a glimpse of several moments in my week. He might scratch his head as he watches me and a few others with our eyes closed and talking to the ceiling. He might scrunch up his face as he sees me cutting some pictures and gluing together lolly sticks for toddlers. He might wonder why on earth I’m at my table looking intently at a paragraph in an ancient book for an hour. And he might concur with noted atheist writer Sam Harris. While religious people are not generally mad, their core beliefs are. And from time to time, that makes me pause. The weeds of doubt begin to sprout. I have a BA from an educational institution of some standing, an MA with first-class honours (that should be proof enough there is a merciful God!), and this is what I do? Is it worth it? Is it even sane?

I doubt(!), though, I struggle with doubt as others have. Or maybe that’s because I haven’t come to terms with my particular doubts yet. For most of the time, I have strong confidence in the existence of God. To be honest, I don’t think I could ever be an atheist. To me, it seems too clear that its end point is despair. Does that make me someone who leans on faith as a psychological crutch, then, rather than someone prepared to go where the evidence leads? I don’t think so. I have prior faith commitments, to be sure, but when I consider the best arguments for theism, I find them compelling.

But when I reflect upon it, my doubts are of a different nature. I can easily believe that God exists. Indeed, even that God is in control. But when it comes to the business of life, that’s when I see where my struggle lies. I don’t necessarily ask it, but it’s there in the back of my mind. Is God good? Does he actually care for me? The struggle, for me, lies not between theism and atheism, but theism and deism. That is, God is out there, sure, but is God near? Is he for me?

And when those doubts gain the upper hand, it doesn’t necessarily lead to me renouncing my Christian faith. Instead, I beat a hasty retreat to living in the here and now with perfunctory references to God. That’s easy. Or easier. Easier than grappling with the prospect of hope. Opening myself to the possibility that I might discover more of a God who loves me more than I could imagine, who wants to make me more in line with what he’s created me to be, that’s mind-blowing. But I can’t cope with the prospect of disappointment either, that God simply doesn’t show up. Or worse, won’t show up. That’s where doubt focuses you and me. Vaughan Roberts describes it well: doubt is an attention-seeking child.

We all doubt, to varying degrees – the Catholic writer Michael Novak calls doubt a razor’s edge that runs through every soul. The messiness of life virtually ensures its existence. And if all the culture-watchers are right and we live in post-modern times, characterised by incredulity towards metanarratives, then the conditions are even more ripe for doubt.

Assurance was the theme of our recent student getaway, with talks from 1 John. And students did show up with questions. There were intellectual kinds of doubts. Doubts that crop up because we’re talking about things that need work to get our heads round. Predestination. And Scripture. Big questions. The latter, especially, seems to me to be the urgent question of our times, and yet one which I believe we can develop robust answers to. And doubts that weren’t strictly due to the lack of evidence, but due to us deeming it insufficient. I wonder if there’s something to the criticism of conservatives/Reformed types that we sometimes foster a culture which demands that we have everything neatly tied up, although I think in my context, this is more due to university rather than church culture.

There were other kinds of doubts. Friends who we thought were going strong as Christians, but have dropped out. That can shake you – will it happen to me too? Especially when I know I’m a pretty rubbish Christian? I’m not where I ought to be.

The answer, as it always is, is Jesus. Not in a superficial way. Not that, as my student pastor says, we bury our doubts. We name them, and we examine them. But we also consider Jesus. Jesus, who really did become human. Jesus, who really can and does sympathise with us. Jesus who is good and trustworthy, and who gave up his life for us on the cross. The cross tells us of the seriousness of our sin, and the certainty of forgiveness and restoration. And as we struggle to follow him, in spite of our doubts, we know that we follow him – that’s a big theme in 1 John.

Doubt calls attention to the dissonance we feel in our lives, the disordered hearts that we have. Doubt reminds us of our finitude as human beings. But God can use doubt too, to point us back to faith. Faith that rests on historical evidence, and faith that acknowledges God has broken into our world. God has shown up!

That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we have looked at and our hands have touched—this we proclaim concerning the Word of life. The life appeared; we have seen it and testify to it, and we proclaim to you the eternal life, which was with the Father and has appeared to us. We proclaim to you what we have seen and heard, so that you also may have fellowship with us. And our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son, Jesus Christ.
- 1 John 1:1-3

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Servant of God, or, what one evangelical looks like to the world

2009-04-02T22:08:00.005Z

I'm always fascinated by how the media portrays evangelicals/evangelicalism*. I think part of it is because I'm interested in the medium itself, and as an evangelical, I am also naturally curious about how I'm perceived by the world at large. Of course, at the same time, it can be a bit of a risky exercise, since it can leave you feeling incandescent with rage or self-pity when you feel (inevitably?) misrepresented! Hey, we evangelicals have a strong doctrine of sin after all! :-p Still, I gave in when I saw that BBC3 had a documentary following a British teenage evangelical, and caught in on the internet. The above is Part 1 of 6, all of which you can find on Youtube.

It's actually quite fair-minded, and by the end of it, I confess to feeling even a little proud of Deborah. She's probably the most mature 13 year old I've ever seen! Their family looks pretty level-headed, and it's quite refreshing to discover that not knowing who Posh Spice isn't going to destroy your life.

Now I'm sure most of us can also spot some of the negatives. It's quite easy, and valid, to pick on her gospel presentation. A lot of us nowadays cringe at something that sounds nothing more than fire insurance, which is what her gospel outline sounds like. Remember though, she's 13! So the hope is as she grows up, she would receive some neccessary biblical corrective teaching on whole-life discipleship. Deborah, do read C.S Lewis's essay 'Learning in War Time' at some point! She's also obviously got a very sensitive and caring nature, and there is a danger where the doctrine of hell could overwhelm her in a way that could be damaging. The other thing that caught my attention was how much "Christianese" there was, which must sound completely alien to anybody that's unchurched.

But at the end of it, I was struck by her boldness, which nonetheless was never expressed in an arrogant spirit - quite the opposite. And I was really interested that a lot of the people she spoke to weren't put off by her, although they probably found what she had to say hard to swallow. In one sense, her age was an advantage. And I was also struck by how much influence her family must have played in her character. Negatively, this could be construed as "brainwashing", as the more charitable comments of skeptics on youtube put it. Positively, though, her level-headedness could also be attributed to the benefits of a stable upbringing, which is increasingly less true of many British teenagers today. There's certainly some truth in the fact that she's culturally conditioned, but then, aren't we all?

Now this documentary isn't going to change anyone's presumptions about what evangelicals are like. But it's good every once in a while to inhabit someone else's eyes and see what strange creatures we are! And to, in spite of our warts and all, not be too quick to see only the bad in evangelicalism*, but rejoice in some of our positives as well.

*in this case, Western evangelicalism, since obviously, Asian evangelicalism wouldn't quite look the same!

Back...with reviews of 2 books on 2 movements

2009-03-30T18:40:00.007Z

Thoroughly enjoyed going on a week-long student retreat, and then doing some children's work at my church family weekend away, but it's taken a lot out of me! So am still recovering...

But I thought I'll break my blog silence with a couple of quick, brief book reviews.

Post-charismatic? by Rob McAlpine

This is not a book for non-charismatics. Nor is this a book for ex-charismatics, despite the title. Those who fall into those categories can and will benefit from reading this. But ultimately, this is an insider's book. It is for those who wish to remain charismatic but are weary of being characterised as charismaniacs. It is for those who want to aim a flaming arrow at the next bigwig who pronounces imminent revival for our nation, or who want to force a dollop of petrol down the throat of the next releaser of "the anointing". And it is for those who don't want to be forced to retreat to a position of long-range sniping, nothing more.

I've been pretty interested in the history of charismaticism ever since I read Nigel Scotland's Charismatics and the New Millennium, especially as I find setting the charismatic movement in its historical context lend much needed perspective often lost in the heat of the next prophetic moment. That book, written by an Anglican charismatic, focused on the British side of things in particular. But I discovered that most books tended to focus on the health-and-wealth side of things or deal with second-blessing theology, which frustrated me. There wasn't much stuff that dealt with the apostolic and prophetic movement side of things (although there are a few biblical studies on prophecy, such as those by Wayne Grudem and Jack Deere), which seemed to me to be the kind of stuff that dominates Malaysian charismaticism. From what I know, there were quite a few books in the 80s critiquing this when it was especially promienent in America, and one or two more recent ones dealing specifically with the Toronto Blessing, but most of them are out of print and hard to get.

So I was quite pleased to discover Robbie McAlpine's material on the internet, but I didn't get much of a chance to plough through as he had secured a publishing contract and had to take it down. So I thought, I'll wait for the book! And here it is.

McAlpine works with YWAM, an organisation that I have personally found both a blessing and a source of exasperation. He wants to tackle charismatic disillusionment by tracing the origins of a lot of charismatic theology, and in doing so provide relief for those who have been wounded by charismatic hype and excess. He covers three areas, of which the first was of most interest to me. The other two are health-and-wealth, and the shepherding movement. The first, however, is the Latter Rain movement. Although the term Latter Rain will probably not be familiar to many, but a lot of today's underlying theology and terminology ("Overcomers", "Joshua/David Generation" etc.) originate here. McAlpine looks at the teachings of William Branham and George Warnock in particular.

But he also attempts to offer a constructive way forward, and so the last third of his book is an attempt to provide guidance on biblical spiritual formation, on doing community, on right expressions of authority, while remaining sensitive to the leading of the Holy Spirit. You could say he leans in an "emerging" direction. Although I wouldn't myself put such a label on him.

McAlpine mostly achieves what he sets out to do, and that's a good thing, considering there aren't many books like his out there. There are a few things I could nitpick. He's actually quite hard on cessationists, which is a bit of a pity considering he is actually extremely gracious throughout the book (He's just as good at picking apart the critics of the charismatic movement!). He clearly didn't want to land firmly on the side of either the Calvinists or the Arminians, which meant that he indulged in a few generalisations which would not please either side. He assumes a bit of knowledge on the part of his audience, as I said at the beginning of this review, those who have never been part of the charismatic movement might be confused by some of his descriptions. And I wish he had done more in explicitly showing the reader how looking at the historical roots of the movement bear out today. Once or twice I was asking, "Yes, I see how that worked in the past, but how does heretical doctrine X/detour Y/etc. show up in the contemporary charismatic movement?"

But this is a much needed book, and I hope the Holy Spirit will use it to truly heal many.

Alternative review.

Don't Stop Believing by Michael Wittmer

So the emerging/ent movement has been around for a while now, and so has its critics. There was D.A Carson and his Becoming Conversant with the Emerging Church, which probably didn't achieve anything but tons of hate mail for poor Don. There was R. Scott Smith's Truth and the New Kind of Christian, which was decent (Tony Jones was happy to commend it) but too narrowly focused on philosophy and was always going to be unlikely to achieve any kind of mass appeal. There was John MacArthur's The Truth War, which, judging from some reviews I read, was abysmal.

Now you'll expect my next sentence to be either "and yet another critique of Emergent that misses the mark" or "at last! A worthy critique!". Well, to be honest, I feel like I'm being unfair to the book by framing it as a critique of the emerging church. It certainly is that, but I think it better to consider this as a more positive book that seeks to remind us that Christianity is both about right belief and right living. Mind, heart and hands, as it were.

Mike Wittmer has already written a superb book on living Christianly in every sphere of life (Heaven is a Place on Earth), so I was quite excited to see he was coming out with this book. What he does in this book is to tackle a series of questions which bring out the differences between traditional evangelicals and emergentish types. For example, must we believe something to be saved? Can you belong before you believe? Is it possible to know anything? In each case he shows the position of conservative evangelicals and "postmodern innovators" (his term), the pros and cons of both positions, and then a third way forward (or biblical, but then every Christian writer must claim that his position is biblical!).

And I think generally, he succeeds. Some chapters are particularly strong. His final three on whether we can know anything, whether the Bible is really God's word, and his concluding thoughts were spot-on, I thought. Wittmer has probably provided the most accessible explanation of Reformed epistemology! As was the chapter on the cross and how both penal substitution and Christus Victor are complementary. His endnotes - yes, I'm a geek, I read endnotes - show that he has definitely read widely in the emerging literature, another big plus.

There were other chapters where I thought he could have said more, and certainly a few where, while I agree with his conclusions and have no objections to his approach, I would have taken a different route, I think. I think I occasionally wanted more discussion of specific biblical texts, but that's just me. I think the one quibble I had was terminology. Are "conservatives" and "postmodern innovators" really the best phrases to use? I'm just afraid that some people who would otherwise be receptive to this book might be turned off by what they might perceive to be caricatures.

That would be a real pity, because this book has real value. I've only had a brief look at another book, Why We're Not Emergent, by Kevin DeYoung and Ted Kluck, which seems to cover much of the same ground but is a bit more focused as a critique of Emergent. Don't Stop Believing is more of a book for fence-sitters, I think. It would be especially good for those who are ready to plunge in headlong into emerging stuff undiscerningly. It would also be great for those put off by fundamentalist/conservative style churches but aren't ready to go off in a completely new direction just yet. But as I indicated earlier, it need not only be for those who are acquainted with the emerging movement. I think us younger evangelicals would be helped as this book helps provide a few safeguards from going completely off-track in our zeal.

So, don't stop believing!

Alternative review.

N.B I use emergent/emerging interchangeably in the review, but I am referring more to the strain represented by the likes of Brian McLaren and Tony Jones, rather than to the wider emerging church, which in any case, has now largely abandoned the term and preferred "missional" instead.

P/S So much for being brief!

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encouragement

2009-03-09T21:01:00.003Z

Yes, am still really busy (panicky?) - and this is just to say you probably won't hear anything much from me this week and next, especially as I'm away on student conference all next week. Preaching seems to have gone well, and I might mention more about that in another post.

The most encouraging thing from last week? There's a lovely Japanese Christian couple in the evangelistic Bible study group I lead. Last Tuesday, the wife, whose English isn't very good, was asking me how I was doing, and then proceeded to say: "We pray for you everyday. We know that you care for us, and we want to care for you too".

Me :-O errrr....I think you give me far too much credit and yourselves too little...

It's little moments like that that makes it worth it, that keeps me going.

Life

2009-02-27T21:43:00.003Z

Yes, it's pretty obvious isn't it, I've been pretty busy recently. Last week was particularly bad - I was really struggling and was grateful for people picking up some of the slack. My own diagnosis, which I still think is right, is that I was on a bad downward spiral: I was tired, which led to me experiencing culture stress pretty acutely, which led to more tiredness. Spending Saturday in London last week helped somewhat, though not perfectly. Nonetheless I thankfully seem to have recouped some of my energy reserves. The workload this week hasn't changed but I seem to be dealing with it better. Worked every single night this week! I'm beginning to feel like an investment banker. Well. Pre-credit crunch anyway. And without the money. Though there's heavenly riches yada yada. :)

I'm going to make my debut next week! Am speaking for 10 minutes on who is Jesus to a fairly disparate group of non-Christian international students. Writing this talk has been really hard. It's all about being selective as to what to include and what not to include, having to monitor any cultural presuppositions from creeping into the text - that's harder than you think! - and trying to find the right pitch for it. I have absolutely no experience of preaching evangelistically. Nada. Not even in a training context. So pray pray pray!

I've been reading through Ephesians with a younger Christian, and have found it both hugely enjoyable and challenging. It's been fun digging into a book I haven't looked at for quite a while now, and exciting to watch him grow and discover things he's never seen before. (Ephesians 1:9-10 anyone? Or chapter 2, a huge favourite of mine?). Quick aside: Max Turner in New Bible Commentary's pretty useful. But I'm also thinking through how to help him see for himself how the Bible speaks into his particular situation instead of me giving him canned answers. And more and more I'm beginning to see that if I don't allow God's Word to preach to me, I'm going to have a really hard time helping anyone do the same for themselves.

Day off tomorrow! Looking forward to it!

Boxes

2009-02-15T22:11:00.004Z

From Epilogue TV

Zac Trust training day

2009-02-09T22:07:00.003Z

Was at a Zacharias Trust training day on Saturday, which I really enjoyed. Especially when I don't have to pay for it! :) I got sponsored by my church. All four speakers were brilliant communicators, albeit with different styles.

In the morning, we had Alister McGrath and John Lennox on engaging the new atheism. It's the first time I've heard Prof. McGrath in person, and he's an exceptional speaker. His lecture covered what was familiar ground for me, as he exposed the fallacy of assuming that science was incompatible with faith. (I know I often warn against the cult of Christian celebrity, but I was sorely tempted to go and get my McGrath book for him to autograph!) John Lennox then tackled the ethical dimension of the new atheism, concluding that the new atheism had no basis in which to ground its morality.

But it was probably Michael Ramsden's talk that was the most interesting I've heard in ages. He surprised me, and I suspect, virtually all the audience by essentially giving us an economics lecture in the first half of his talk, as he sought to explain, as simply as he could, the nuts and bolts of the credit crunch. His basic point was that the current financial system as it stands is ultimately based on trust, which is a subset of morality. And he then went on to speak, ultimately, the gospel into the situation, and that what we need is more than an economic solution, we need to repent and believe! I'm oversimplifying massively here, and I don't think I've even begun to convey how electrifying the talk was.

We ended the day with a man of much wisdom and experience, the imitable Michael Green, who spoke on the confidence we can have in the gospel of Jesus. After being dazzled somewhat by rhetorical fireworks throughout the day, it was great to be reminded, once again, of what the gospel was. Michael Green expounded the gospel, seeking once again to open our eyes afresh, and proceeded briefly to offer some evidence we can be sure Jesus rose from the dead, and that the Scriptures we possess are reliable. A good way to end, especially since none of us will ever have brains as big as Ramsden and gang. But it is the gospel that forms the bedrock of our confidence, not the intellect of some big names.

Apologetics no longer floats my boat the way it once did, but I was reminded that the body of Christ is made of many parts, all of them indispensable, and so we must pay tribute to Christian apologetics for the service it renders to the glory of God.

...and a note on Perak...

2009-02-06T21:35:00.001Z

Certainly a low point in Malaysian politics.

Raising the next generation

2009-02-06T21:06:00.006Z

The latest 9Marks ejournal has some interesting stuff on raising the next generation of pastoral workers as the church's job, including a very stimulating interview with Mark Dever. One excerpt:

9M: When you talk about the importance of a church having a 360 degree view of person's life, you are relying on a certain philosophy of ministry. What assumptions are you making about how ministry and Christian growth work? Why not just train me in Greek and homiletics and put me behind a pulpit, like a seminary can do?

Dever: That's a great question. I'm assuming that ministry is more than simple proclamation. Simple proclamation is essential to ministry—it's a non-negotiable. But then that proclamation takes place in the context of a community of people who know each other. They're geographically in the same place; they assemble regularly together; and, as a consequence, they know each other.
There seems to be the presumption in the New Testament of pastoral authority accompanying pastoral relationships, as in Hebrews 13, where the members are told to consider the lives of the leaders (in verse 7) before they are told to obey those leaders (in verse 17).

The importance of knowing one another also fits with what we hear the Lord say in John 13 about our witness: that the world will know we are his disciples by the love we have for one another.
I in no way want to denigrate the centrality of preaching the word. But if we just preach the Word without having this relational web or context for ministry, which is the local church, then we don't know how to do membership, how to do discipline, how to disciple; we're not going to be a very good witness either (or if we are, it's accidental)...

Read the whole thing.

The other interesting section was the profiles of various church-affiliated training programmes, and particularly the one on Ministry Training Course (MTS) in Australia, as that's the one which provided the template for church apprenticeships here in the UK. A few of their reflections on the benefits of these apprenticeships:

Apprentices learn to integrate Word, life and ministry practice.

Apprentices are tested in character.

Apprentices learn that ministry is about people, not programs...They learn that ministry is about prayerfully proclaiming Christ to people, not administrating endless programs.

...Another problem with the academic training model is that it suits certain personalities. But our best evangelists and church planters might be those who struggle to learn in the passive context of the classroom. These people thrive in a context where they were talking and preaching and building ministries and being tutored along the way. In academia they would be deemed failures.

And on seminaries:

"...An apprentice model has the advantage of on-the-job training, but the disadvantage of training with only one man's perspective and capacity. Seminaries have the great blessing of "the multiplier effect," preparing many students under the best minds in their fields of study. And the best seminaries do this with field-service requirements that will also involve students in the real life of the church.

No system is perfect, but the blessings of a good seminary education are seen both in the ministry retention rates of well trained graduates as well as in the increasing availability of first-rate seminary training in the developing world. Such training will do much to curb the destructive health-and-wealth gospel that passes for Christianity in too many nations.

...I believe the best ministry preparation takes place where there is a partnership between the seminary and the local church. Some things are well learned in a classroom. Some things are best learned in the dynamic of a local church..."

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Snow

2009-02-05T22:56:00.005Z

Two figures, St. James Park; a snow-covered Soho Square in London. [Pics from Times Picture Gallery]

It's not uploaded on my computer, but I had a snowball fight this morning, and got to see my first snowman (never had enough snow to see one built before)!

The Sunday School answer is still the best one

2009-02-04T23:01:00.006Z

So I was making my way out after listening to the lunchtime talk from Joe Boot on whether Christianity is restrictive or promises true freedom with a non-Christian friend. I confess, I think he did ramble on a bit, and I wasn't sure if he really spoke to the heart as well as to the mind, as it were. But it was all in all a good presentation contending for the intellectual credibility of the Christian faith, and he marshalled the philosophical arguments well.

Anyway, I then noticed a girl whom I had chatted to briefly last night at another event, and so decided to go over and say hi. And got ambushed.

Me: Oh, hi... (interrupted)

Girl: (obviously still buzzing from the talk, speaking at 100mph) Yeah wasn't that a really good talk but I really disagreed with him as I think it was all based on an assumption that needn't be made that life had to find its meaning in God I mean we can obviously derive meaning from other things like family or friends and find fulfillment in that don't you think?

Me: (trying to pick myself up from the bullet train in front of me) Errr...yes...but isn't it, um, true, um, that his central point was how much life would simply be meaningless without a God? And um, what an empty life that would be?

Girl: Sure but do you really need a God for that I mean I don't see why you need God for life to be meaningful at all when you can be perfectly happy with what you've got at the moment...

Me: (screaming silently at brain to come back from lunch break and voicebox to stop stuttering) Yes, I can see where you're coming from... (obviously stalling for time while brain wakes up from siesta)...so um, what you're saying is that ultimately, there's no reason why it can't be up to us to find our own meaning in life...

Girl: Yes... (looks expectantly at me while I desperately attempt to look to be in deep contemplation)

Me: Errm...(here I started a sentence - twice - before hastily rephrasing it)That's interesting, as um, I think he (Joe Boot) chose a particular line looking at how ultimately only Christianity lends our lives deep meaning. But you're right, why shouldn't we be able to um, make our own meaning? But the question isn't simply pragmatic, it isn't just about where we find meaning or fulfillment or happiness, it's also about truth. If God is God, if he's real, he's there, then surely he's the one who has the final say as to where we find real meaning or happiness? I mean, if there's no God, then you're right, we can invest meaning in whatever we wish. But if God is there, then surely he's the one whom we derive meaning from, and so we want to live in conformity with what he says.

Girl: (finally slowing down a little) I see...so what you're saying is, there's actually another issue at stake here, whether God exists or not...

Me: (Whew!) Yes, exactly, that's what we need to think about first...

Girl: But...I don't see how that question can ever be answered. I don't think there's any way we can ever find out if God does exist or not.

Me: (depending on reflex at this point, and probably the Holy Spirit) That's interesting, because that's exactly what the Christian claim is. You know, in John's Gospel, it says that we can actually find out whether God exists, what he's like because, because, and this is what Christians believe, Jesus has made God known. Look at Jesus, Christians say, and you'll know God.

Girl: ...never really thought about that before...

Me: And so Christians will say, look at Jesus' claims. What's he like? Is he whom he says he is? I mean, if he isn't, then Christianity falls completely. But if he is, can you see how that completely changes everything? (Girl nods) It just turns your world upside down! So we need to find out more about Jesus. He's the pivotal figure.

Girl: So you're saying I need to go find out more about Jesus because he's basically the pivot, the one on which everything stands? Yeah I can see that.

Me: Do you think you'll be exploring more on this then?

Girl: Yeah, I think I will! Got to go!

Me: (still slightly dazed) What just happened??

The conversation lasted, I think, only 7 minutes or so, but I don't think I've quite wrapped my head around it just yet. But I guess, the Sunday School answer is really, still the best one. I certainly hope she'll realise that.

*Conversation not verbatim obviously, but I think I've reproduced the phrasing fairly accurately

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Reprise

2009-02-03T22:51:00.005Z

Nearly 3 years ago now I had my first significant conversation about possibly pursuing paid full-time gospel ministry. And here I am, much further on this expedition than I thought was even possible a year ago.

Today, rather unexpectedly, I got to sit down with someone at the same stage I was then: an international student and finalist, taking tentative steps and peeking through that door marked "Full-time paid gospel ministry". And wonderfully, this student, having only peered through a peephole of this weird and wonderful and frightening world, then got up with a glimpse of a much broader vista. Well, ok, those are my words. :) But I hope I did help in some way, as we explored how to think through those questions, and as I got to lay on the table some options and resources that had not previously been considered, I helped this particular person just a little further along the way.

Walking home, I had one of those out-of-body experiences where I was thinking to myself: Man, I can't believe I actually said this or that! Was that me? Ugh!

And then I thought: Cool!